A Season For Everything

The Beauty of Emptiness

2011-11-08T14:39:00.000-08:00

There are times in our lives where we have to deal with emptiness. Often we feel worn out, heartbroken, emotionally drained or a combination of all of those things. We feel as if we have been poured out and there is nothing left. We see these times as discouraging and more of a valley than a mountaintop.

It is at these times we often wonder why God has allowed us to come to this place.

In contemplating this why, God showed me something wonderful - the Beauty of Emptiness - empty wine containers at a wedding, an empty alabaster jar, and an empty tomb. All of these things were an emptiness that Christ worked though. If these things had been full their significance would have never been seen. There had to be an emptying for Christ to shine through.

When I feel empty instead of looking at is a depletion of me, maybe I should see it as more room for Christ to work in me - letting me become less and Him becoming more.

While We Were Sleeping

2011-03-26T07:41:00.000-07:00

The Parable of the Ten Virgins

1 “At that time the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. 2 Five of them were foolish and five were wise. 3 The foolish ones took their lamps but did not take any oil with them. 4 The wise ones, however, took oil in jars along with their lamps. 5 The bridegroom was a long time in coming, and they all became drowsy and fell asleep.
6 “At midnight the cry rang out: ‘Here’s the bridegroom! Come out to meet him!’

7 “Then all the virgins woke up and trimmed their lamps. 8 The foolish ones said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your oil; our lamps are going out.’

9 “‘No,’ they replied, ‘there may not be enough for both us and you. Instead, go to those who sell oil and buy some for yourselves.’

10 “But while they were on their way to buy the oil, the bridegroom arrived. The virgins who were ready went in with him to the wedding banquet. And the door was shut.

11 “Later the others also came. ‘Lord, Lord,’ they said, ‘open the door for us!’

12 “But he replied, ‘Truly I tell you, I don’t know you.’

13 “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour.
Matthew 25 1-13

In 1995 a movie came out called, "While You Were Sleeping". In the movie a young woman who is secretly in love with a man that doesn't even know she exists is catapulted into a series of humorous, but difficult situations, when she saves his life and is mistakenly identified as his fiance. While the man is in a coma or "sleeping" a lot happens and he wakes up to find his life isn't the same. Today I think it can be said that in many ways the church is sleeping and while it has been sleeping a lot has been happening.

It is amazing that in today's age of media and news that we as Christians are often going through the motions as if we are sleep walking. We really do not have an excuse that we don't know what is going on around us. Just turn on the news or talk to a neighbor. If you aren't aware or have been in autopilot for a while, don't worry you have a lot of company. I can honestly say I was there about 5 years ago. It is almost as if the church in America and other parts of the world has lulled its congregations into a stupor where we just don't see that we not about our Father's business.

Here are just some of the things happening While We Were Sleeping,

There are between 140 - 170 million orphans in the world. Yes, those numbers are correct! If we were truly awake and being obedient to
would those numbers be so high? Now not all of us are called to actually adopt a child into our home, but we are all called to help and be a part of aiding these children and their potential new families.

There are 27 million people in modern-day slavery across the world.

There are 1 million children exploited by the global commercial sex trade, every year.

There is 32 billion in total yearly profits generated by the human trafficking industry.

There are 244,000 American children and youth estimated to be at risk of child sexual exploitation, including commercial sexual exploitation, in 2000.

1.3 billion people (over a fifth of the world's population) live below the international poverty line of $1/day and a further 1.6 billion (another quarter of the world's population) survive on between one and two dollars In the latter half of the 1990s, one third of the world's willing to work population was either unemployed or underemployed, the worse situation since the 1930s.

In 1997, 57% of the people living in the Third World had no access to sanitation In 1997, 40% of all Third World children under the age of 5 were underweight or starving. In 1996 the average daily intake of calories in the Third World was 2090 cal, unchanged since 1970. About 840 million people worldwide are now malnourished.

I could go on but you can get the picture. People, especially children, go without families, clean water, food, and they are subjected to trafficking and other horrors that we witness through media.

If we are truly followers of Christ and his commandments are very specific in regards to loving our neighbor, feeding and clothing the least of these and to look after orphans and widows, why are these problems so large? Could it be that while we were sleeping and being comfortable in our salvation that we forgot there is work to be done? While we were sleeping the enemy has gotten the upper hand.

In Matthew the parable of the ten virgins talks about the wise and foolish virgins. The foolish that fell asleep while waiting on the bridegroom. I fear if Christ came today we would fall into the foolish five. Let's wake up and get to work!

Let us rub the sleep from our eyes and put on the armor of God and take back the territory that we have lost during our slumber. Let us arise and go forth in kindness, love, giving, and showing the Light to the darker parts of the world. Let us never forget that we are all called to follow Christ's example and that if we bury our talents or salvation until the Master returns there will be wailing and gnashing of teeth.

Christ talked a lot about those that would think they were his followers but in the end would be told "depart, I know you not". We need to get off the fence, get out of the Church at Laodicea, and stop sleeping! There is much to be done and there isn't a lot of time to do it. It isn't just the Christ's return is near but everyday we wait is a day a child goes without a home, a family, clean water, safety, and hope.

Reread Matthew 25 and look up Proverbs 24:25. Can we truly say we don't know? Can we truly say we were asleep?

The Prodigal Point Revisited

2011-01-10T18:33:00.001-08:00

I think for most Christians we can all relate to the story Jesus tells of the Prodigal Son. The story of a son who asks his father for his inheritance early so he can go live his life on his terms. Then after squandering his money and sinking to depths he thought he would never get to, he decides to go back home and ask to be at least a servant in his own father's house. Upon his return his father welcomes him home with love and reestablishes him to the place of son with much celebration. I have always found it interesting that this story is so relevant to most of our lives.

There is a point in time when we stop running from God and start going back towards. That point in time when our direction changes, to me, is called the prodigal point. The point when we change our direction from one that is of our own making to one that is in God's plan. It can be a slow gradual change or a definite ninety degree or higher angle turn.

I think as Christians we often feel that point is the moment of salvation but in reality it is more at the point where we realize it is all about Him and not about me. Is is the point where we realize, He must increase and I must decrease.

I am not sure that there was one exact point in time that I can say definitely on this day I started back towards my Heavenly Father but there was a point where I understood that to continually search all directions of my life compass when the needle was pointing to God was going to be futile.

I think there comes a time when we have tried it our way, realize what we thought we wanted isn't making us happy, or we still feel something is missing that we begin to look outsides ourselves for the answer. Even as Christians I think we spend some time wandering the Fields of Ourselves looking for answers that just don't seem to come or seem to be wrong.

I realized that after the birth of our third child that God was calling me to stay home with our kids. I didn't get all the calling right as I also thought they should be in private school which ended up being a financial nightmare, but the part of being with my kids was right. This seemed so contrary to my previous college ambitions and career I had when I quit working. I have a degree in Business with an International Concentration. Yep, I wanted to work for a global company, travel to foreign places, and be somebody. Did you see the reoccurring word in all of that - "I".

I wanted, I was going to, and my career. So full of self. So lacking in looking to God for direction. My first job out of college was no where in the international arena. I was working for a company in Tallassee, Alabama. Definitely not to be found in international destinations or travel magazines. A nice, cute, and southern town but it definitely did not require a passport. I was working for an international company, but in the manufacturing facility where I did technical support I wasn't about to be able to be asked to convert my American dollars for Euros, Pesos, Yen, or any other exotic foreign currency.

My training in imports and exports, foreign customs, and my minor in Spanish gave way to the clean up song from Barney, a cute little ditty from a tomato and a cucumber and how to get three kids out the door in under 30 minutes if necessary. My desire to "make things happen" became a desire to keep my sanity amidst toddler meltdowns, play dates, and school functions. My negotiation skills became overshadowed by negotiating the lines at Toys R Us and the dreaded Chuck E. Cheese as well as negotiating nap time in exchange for a Disney video later.

The jaguar I hoped to have one day became a mini-van and the nice clothes became functional and machine washable because you can't even hope to get spit up out of silk blouse. But before I start to sound as if I wish I had the Jag, the nice clothes, and knew how to make a deal in six languages, I can honestly say that once I came to the prodigal point all that didn't matter. A "thank you mommy" and time playing with my kids has become far more rewarding than any score on an annual review. My children became the priority and learning to follow God's lead became the business plan.

I wish I had learned it earlier and maybe it is more like accepted it earlier. I know that it wouldn't have made it necessarily easier, but I would be further down the road and would have spent more time in His will instead of mine.

I started heading in the direction of learning what His will for my life is and not what my will is. I haven't quite mastered it yet and know I probably won't quite get there for awhile but I am headed in that direction. It is hard to head back to our Father broken, ashamed, and humbled by the mess or stress we have created attempting to do it our way. The thing is, that is just one of the times He pours out His unfailing love on us. He understands and He is able to restore us to what we were meant to be.

The prodigal point is a point of beginning and understanding. It isn't a point of perfection, but a point of persistence and providence. It is the point we go forward and know that It is His will that matters and not mine.

Skating in my Socks while it is Pouring

2011-01-01T20:39:00.000-08:00

The other day I was in the kitchen putting away dishes. I was in socks and as I went to cross the floor I started skating across the linoleum like I used to do as a child. For a few seconds or inches I was carefree again feeling the joy of gliding across the floor. I skated back to the dishwasher and realized what a wonderful feeling sock skating can be. It is like a time machine taking you back to a time when life seemed much simpler and a lot more fun. It is often difficult to remember times like those when you deal with a loved one that struggles with depression, anxiety, and life in general.

Depression, anxiety, and life are very difficult things for the person struggling with them but it is also very difficult for those around them. It is like it is constantly raining, not just sprinkling but a real downpour. It is as if the sun rarely shines and you are left standing in a puddle, dripping wet, while searching for a rainbow that just can't seem to form. I started thinking about the brief moment of happiness I felt as I glided across the floor. How I wish the person I was thinking of could feel that moment, could experience the elation of just letting the world slip away for just even a few minutes.

I think at times we want someone to snap out of it, just look at the positive, and learn that life isn't all that bad. But this is much easier said than done for a person struggling with these issues. Their world looks very different than our own, or at least mine for that matter. I have come to the realization that we probably all live in worlds a little different from each other.

I have had to realize that even for a normally upbeat person like myself there are times when life can seem overwhelming but for the person struggling with depression and anxiety these times are almost debilitating. They struggle to see the positive, they struggle to realize the blessings in their lives, they struggle to try to see the silver lining, and they struggle to just focus on today and take things one day at a time.

I have real compassion for those that are trying to deal with these things. I know that even in my darkest days I still can find a candle flickering in the dark and can make my way toward it. I am not sure how I would be if there was no light or I couldn't see it. Even trying to be a light for someone that struggles with depression can be an uphill battle in the dark.

These uphill campaigns while daunting at times are worth the battle. Those we love that struggle with anxiety and depression need to know they aren't alone. They need to know someone is standing in the gap for them, loving them, and praying for them - even if that someone is in socks skating across the kitchen floor.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
1Corinthians 13:7

Christmas Reflection - No Room in the Inn

2010-12-27T13:30:00.000-08:00

"And while they were there, the time came for her to give birth. 7And she gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him in swaddling cloths and laid him in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn." Luke 2:6-7

This is the part of the account of Jesus' birth that we often focus on when we read the Christmas story. We often think about how difficult it must have been for Mary and Joseph to arrive in Bethlehem and not find a place to stay with the impending birth of Jesus. How we seem to agonize over the fact that the New Born King had to be born and sleep in a the place animals spent their evening. A manger for a bed and a cold and dirty place for Him to be born.

We often wonder if the very people He lived among had understood who He really was, would they have resigned Him to such a place?

Often we look at His humble beginnings and relate them to His own humility and humanity. We see his ability to understand where we are by coming to us in such a place.

The thing that really struck me this year was the "no place for them in the inn" is still very true today in our own lives. How many of us have so much going on that there is very little room for Jesus in our own lives? There is the whole trappings of Christmas that seem to resign Jesus to the nativities of our mantles and not to our actions and service toward others. But it really goes beyond Christmas. If Christ came to us at other times in the year, would there be room for Him?

Would we rearrange our schedules, would we take the time to welcome Him, would we put those things behind us that keep Him from coming closer? Is there room in our lives for Christ or does He have to get in line behind friends, family, jobs, kids, and just our every day lives?

We often cringe at the fact there was no room over 2000 years ago, but the sad reality is it is often the same way today.

As the new year starts, I pray that we are able to move aside those things which take up room that aren't really important and often keep us from being obedient or becoming more like Christ. Let us rid ourselves of those things which would keep Christ in the manger and not with us.

Shattered Faith

2010-11-29T16:12:00.000-08:00

Every year for the past 6 years or so my mom has sent each of us a new ornament for our Christmas tree. It is a tradition that the kids look forward to about this time of year. This year was different, we actually got to pick out our ornaments when she was here in September. We spent a fun afternoon deciding on which ornament to pick. I remember having a difficult time picking one. In the end I chose a simple ball type ornament with the word "Faith" hand written on it with a little bit of hand embellishments.

Mom took the ornaments with her when she returned home and as she usually does she sent them up here for us to unwrap as a pre-Christmas present and tradition. When the box arrived this year, the kids were excited and I have to admit I was too. When I opened the box and got ready to give each child theirs I discovered mine was broken. I wanted to cry. Not so much because of the loss of a material object but what it represented, it was as if the way I had been feeling and everything our family has been struggling with this year was symbolized in the broken "Faith" ornament.

There it lay in the wrappings broken beyond repair and I could just feel the weight of our year upon me. A year that has been very difficult and filled with loss, uncertainty, brokenness, and at times, yes - a struggle to believe that God was in the midst of everything. My faith was not broken but it has taken a beating this year. As I stared at the broken ornament, I heard a small voice remind me that even in the midst of brokenness and sorrow God is at work. God is able to take what was and is broken and restore and resurrect it into something stronger and victorious if we allow Him to do so.

It is amazing at how silent God can seem at times but He is always there and can take our sorrow and difficulties and make them a venue for His work. Yes, the ornament was broken, but my faith was able to be made stronger by listening to my Father show me the beauty of His faithfulness.

True faith that it takes to follow God can not be made out of fragile glass that can break, but has to strengthen as we walk forward. It is like the grain of sand that becomes a pearl. Layer by layer and experience by experience our faith should become stronger so when the valleys come it can be shaken and at times wounded but never totally broken. I realized that my faith will survive and will be made stronger by the year we have been through.

I am not sure I can replace the ornament with another one just like it, but I know the lesson I learned from it is worth more than the shattered pieces I just haven't had the heart to throw away yet. At those moments when God reaches down in our valleys to touch us and strengthen us we realize He is close enough to sense the tears and understand the pain. Out of the brokenness of what was He is able to create something more beautiful than before, and isn't that really what Christmas is all about?

Planners, Calendars, and Lists, Oh My!

2010-08-09T11:22:00.000-07:00

I am one of those people who understands the importance of structure an organization, but as Anna Hathaway says as Princess Mia in The Princess Diaries 2, "the concept is grasped, it is the execution that is illusive." Believe me I have tried many things to get on track so to speak. There are areas I am better in than others but as a whole, I seemed destined to stay just to the right or the left of the organizational target.

I love calendars and planners. I love three ring binders with tabs. I love all the items to help us organize, I just can't seem to keep the momentum going. In all the sea of stuff to keep me organized, somehow I manage to keep rocking the boat.

To add to the complexity, my husband is the exact opposite. I can say I am better than I used to be. I have had to be to keep both our sanities intact! He doesn't quite see how I don't see the value in being organized and structured. The reality is I do, I just can't seem to keep it going. I am just way too much Mary and not enough Martha. Somewhere in me I just have to find a way to balance it all.

In my attempt to solve our online calendaring problem, the problem being we need an online calendar that works well with our Blackberry phones so we can all be synced up and on the same page, or screen as the case may be. Sometime I think all of this syncing thing just adds more complexity, but I digress. I came across this list that I think is really funny but too true at times.

To give credit where it is due, it is from Mandi Ehman and it was posted on www.cozi.com. So here it is...

Top 10 Reasons You Shouldn’t Plan a Weekly Menu

When it comes to planning a weekly menu, there are plenty of sites that tell you all the reasons you should plan ahead. Let's look at the top ten reasons you shouldn't:

10. You’re a non-conformist by nature, and since meal plans are popular, you refuse to give in.

9. You like to spend your free time staring blankly at the pantry trying to come up with dinner ideas. It’s like a hobby.

8. You prefer the “seek and you shall find” method of meal planning. You stock the shelves and the fridge, and your family is required to seek-and-find their meals there.

7. You like to test your cooking skills by looking through the cabinets at 5:15 in the afternoon and creating a gourmet meal out of the random ingredients you find.

6. Your family enjoys having the same seven dinners every week, so there’s no need for a menu plan.

5. You’re a free spirit and refuse to be bogged down with “organization” of any kind.

4. You want to be able to blame an empty refrigerator and pantry when you tell your extended family they can’t drop by at dinnertime.

3. The grocery store is your “happy place” and you like making extra trips to pick up last-minute ingredients.

2. You want to do your part to boost the economy by spending lots of money at the grocery store, even if the food goes bad before you use it.

1. You like to use the excuse “We don’t have anything to eat” as a reason to go out to dinner.

Now, unfortunately, I can relate to some of these. :) Not that any of these are specific reasons I use for not using a meal plan. Afterall, I have planned meals before, but when you seem to misplace the meal plan in the stack of papers on the edge of your desk it isn't that helpful. Then there is the family that decides they want to switch the nights all around because they don't want what is scheduled for that night.

I pray that one day God will get through to me and I can embrace more of the Martha without having to sacrifice the Mary part. I can honestly say, He isn't finished with me yet. It gives me hope in knowing that God does understand unfinished work and that one day it will all come together in an awesome and organized way.

Have Another Glass of Sweet Tea!

2010-08-01T19:08:00.003-07:00

If I could sum up a southern experience it would be sitting outside on a porch in the late afternoon in September as the sun is starting to set drinking a cool glass of sweet tea while you reflect on the peach cobbler you just had. Sitting around with friends or family and just catching up. Chatting till you get the first bite – bite from a mosquito that is. Then you continue to catch up and you can tell how engrossed you are in the conversation by whether you notice you’re being eaten alive and have become a blood donor for the mosquito population. When the conversation is really enthralling you don’t mind the “skeeters”.

My husband often teases me for having the ability to talk to just about anyone about anything. I think it is a southern thing. In today’s world of email, cell phones, text messaging, I don’t think it will be Sherman’s march to Atlanta that will cause a disruption in the southern way of life, but the march of technology into our lives. Now, you don’t have to see anyone to talk to them and you don’t even have to have really have met them in person to call them your friend. While some of this is great, and in the essence of full disclosure and honesty, one of my best friends is a wonderful lady I met online, I think at times it has it draw backs. After all, sweet tea is at its best outside during the summer or fall with friends. Sure, you don’t have to worry about skeeter bites in your home, well most of the time anyway, but I would rather deal with a little loss of blood than a big loss of the human factor that makes us relate so much better to each other.

Technology can’t duplicate the cool condensation you feel when you pick the glass of tea and then move it to your other hand so you can slap the mosquito on your leg. So grab your sweet tea, get your mosquito repellent, and go on and enjoy the sunset. Leave the computer, phone, tv, Ipod, MP3 player, etc inside and drink it all in outside.

Five Stones of Faith and One Stone of Deliverance

2010-06-27T18:54:00.000-07:00

I was drawn to the story of David and Goliath in 1 Samuel Chapter 17. It is one of those stories I heard very often in church as a child. The interesting thing about the Bible stories we tell children is we often leave out some of the important details. Even in reading the passage as an adult I missed something I seemed to see in a different light the other day. In the account in 1 Samuel you have the story of the young shepherd boy, David, being sent to check on his brothers who are fighting with Saul against the Philistines. As he draws near to the conflict he realizes there isn't really any fighting going on as much as the Israelites cowering from the giant Goliath. You have two armies facing each other but nothing much getting done because there is a Giant taunting the Israelites to come out and face him and there doesn't seem to be anyone brave enough to answer the challenge.

As David assesses the situation he realizes that the Philistines can not continue to defy God and he offers to kill the giant. Now, here is a young man that is probably in his teens offering to do what and army of much older, bigger, and stronger men are not willing to do. King Saul decides to let this boy go forward and face the giant. He tries to arm him with armor but David has trouble moving with the extra weight and the unfamiliarity of the battle gear. So, he goes to a stream and picks up five smooth stones. This is what caught my attention!

Here is a young man facing a giant with his peoples' fate in his hands not to mention his own life and he chooses five stones. It is not that he only chose five that amazed me but that he chose so many. This young man felt assured he would be able to not only get one shot off but a few more at least. Facing a giant he was not as big as or battle worn as, he had faith he would live long enough to get off five shots. Consider how a sling had to be used. You had to be able to stand still long enough to get the momentum going to sling it and you had to be able to aim as well. This isn't a weapon you can just operate while in motion. He had the faith in God that he would have enough time and stamina to get off five shots to bring down the giant.

What happens next in the story as you read it is all the more wonderous, "48 As the Philistine moved closer to attack him, David ran quickly toward the battle line to meet him. 49 Reaching into his bag and taking out a stone, he slung it and struck the Philistine on the forehead. The stone sank into his forehead, and he fell facedown on the ground. 50 So David triumphed over the Philistine with a sling and a stone; without a sword in his hand he struck down the Philistine and killed him."

It was the first stone he drew out that killed the giant! He didn't need the remaining four. The faith of the five stones brought the deliverance of one stone. David knew God would handle the giant, all he had to do was to be faithful in answering the call. How many times in our lives do we cower from the giant or ramp up ourselves with all kinds of firepower to take it down? Maybe sometimes we have to learn that if we would give the battle to God instead of our own plans we would be more victorious in our lives. Whether it is five stones or fives loaves of bread, God is able to do far more that we can plan for or think of if we trust in Him.

I am sure that day long ago when David went to the stream to pick up his stones, he knew that the biggest giant that had to be conquered was a lack of faith. It is not that giants we see before us that lie between us and our victory, but the ones we create that hold us back. On that day long ago David learned that five stones of faith cleared the way for the one stone of deliverance.

The Path

2010-06-14T05:58:00.000-07:00

We went hiking this past weekend on part of the Appalachian trail in northern Georgia. It was beautiful and a wonderful time to get out with the kids. My oldest daughter and I usually end up at the back of our crew because I stop to take pictures and I try to keep a laid back and consistent pace to keep my asthma from acting up. As she and I were hiking along a very root intensive and rocky path she said to me, "This path is like the Christian path. The paved path is like the path of the world." It is amazing at times the perception of our children.

She is correct. A Christian journey isn't always easy and shouldn't be easy. If we are to become more refined in the image of Christ it is going to be difficult. There are going to be difficult rough spots along the way, but along the way there is also much beauty to see others can't imagine or feel.

If we stayed on the paved road we might get somewhere quicker and with less wear and tear on ourselves but we would miss so much of what God has to offer. The question is to where does the paved path takes us?

The Christian path may not always be smooth, but it is well worth the journey!

"But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it." Matthew 7:14

The Scars

2010-05-30T20:39:00.001-07:00

24Now Thomas, one of the Twelve, called the Twin, was not with them when Jesus came. 25So the other disciples told him, "We have seen the Lord." But he said to them,"Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe."

26Eight days later, his disciples were inside again, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, "Peace be with you." 27Then he said to Thomas, "Put your finger here, and see my hands; and put out your hand, and place it in my side. Do not disbelieve, but believe." 28Thomas answered him, "My Lord and my God!" John 20:24-28

One of the things I have always thought neat about the story of Christ's resurection was the fact He still had the scars from the nails in his hands and the wound at his side. Here was the Son of God that had been risen from the dead, surely He could have been risen into a totally perfect body. Why then have the scars?

As we can read from Thomas' initial reaction he needed the scars to prove that his savior had risen, he need to feel the scars.

I think often of the scars we have in our own lives. Hurt and pain from shattered dreams, failed relationships, unrealistic expectations, and just plain things gone wrong. At times I know we wish we could erase them and make them go away. Why can't our mind just blot them out, why doesn't God just make it the way it was so we don't have to carry our scars with us.

I am not sure why exactly Christ had scars but I do know that they were a part of Him people knew, they understood the meaning of them, and they showed people who He was. The perfect person took the sin of the world upon Himself and came away scarred. But instead of removing the scars he made them a way for others to see the power and love of God.

How often do we use our scars to show the love of God to others? How often do we see God's hand at work in our lives and come away changed and marked so that there is no mistaking what He has done.

We all have scars from things in our lives. We can see them as damage and a rift in our lives or if we allow God to work in them and through us they can be a bridge that brings us closer to Him and brings others closer as well. Once the skin has scarred it will never be the same, it is changed forever and likewise once we are touched by His grace and love we should be changed and never the same.

Thomas wanted proof that His savior was the man He saw die and Christ understood that. Jesus has an interesting way of understanding where we are coming from. He also understands how to relate to us in a time of worry, anxiety, and hurt. He understands scars - He understands the marks left by others, the marks of sacrifice, and the marks from pain. He understands that in this world we will not be whole and unblemished, but through His love and grace we can reach beyond our scars to His and be healed.

"Behold, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;..." Isaiah 49:16

Happily Ever After... Revisited

2010-05-15T05:48:00.000-07:00

When I was young I read the fairy tales - Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, The Swan Princess, etc. In each of these books a young lady generally has to deal with a hardship and with the help of magic or her fairy godmother the girl escapes the hardship and spends her life with a charming prince and lives, "happily ever after".

The problem with these stories is what is "happily ever after"? As a young girl I dreamed it was life with a wonderful prince and no worries or hardships and that if anything "bad" came your way it was whisked away with a wand or it was conquered by the charming prince.

Ok, now to wake up and face reality. It isn't reality for us to live in a fairy tale word in the real world. It isn't real to think life will be hardship free, that a ball dress never fitted on us or tried on will look fabulous the first time we put it on just minutes before the ball. After all, would you buy a ball gown you had never tried on a few hours before the ball just because you thought it looked the right size? Now to think of it how many of us have ever worn a ball gown? I am sure the closest most of us have come is a prom dress or our wedding dress. Now seriously how many of you went out a few hours before your wedding and bought a gown without trying it on - "bibbity bobbity boo!". Only a fairy godmother could pull that one off.

I think the problem with the whole "happily ever after" concept is it is a difficult standard to be set for girls. Do I think fairy tales are bad, no. Do I think we need to set more realistic standards for our daughters as they get older, yes. We need to bridge the gap between the "happily ever after" and just "ever after".

"Ever after" is sweats and a t-shirt with baby food on the sleeve, a husband who works all day and doesn't quite understand we work at home too, it is hair that needed cutting 4 weeks ago but had to be delayed due to illness, sports events, a last minute school project. "Ever after" is also financial difficulties, meals at McDonalds, clipping coupons, wearing your hair in a pony tail or hat with no make up and then running into a well dressed friend you haven't seen in a while. Yes, all those things are "ever after". But "ever after" is also wet sloppy baby kisses, the pride of a 6 year old who painted their version of "Starry Night" by Vincent VanGogh, wiping tears away from an 11 year old who misses their best friend and feels their world is falling apart, cheering on your daughter at a swim meet, friends that keep your world from falling apart, and getting an unexpected gift of flowers from your spouse (even if it has been 6 years or so who is counting :) ), etc.

All in all whether your "Ever After" is happy is pretty much up to you. I have found that most of mine is happy. Is my life a fairy tale? No, but it is a tale, my tale. Full of mundane everyday life activities with bursts of surprises, joys, incredible sunsets, hardships, and financial struggles, and more laundry than I am sure Cinderella ever did. I am sure if I could change parts of it I might but then it wouldn't be the same story and I might have missed out on some of the wonderful parts of my tale thus far. We aren't promised a life of rainbows and sunshine all the time. After all you have to have the rain to make the rainbow. The other thing that makes rainbows so special is they aren't an everyday occurance. Their beauty lies partly in the fact they are only seen once in a while. My story may not be a fairy tale, but it is a fairly good tale and one that I am glad to be a part of.

Sisters!

2010-05-04T17:48:00.001-07:00

Last week the kids and I were in Target. We were making our weekly trip to get the stuff on the Target List. As we were finishing up our shopping, our oldest Michaela said, "Emily isn't like any of us, she is definately her own person." Emily is our fourth child. She definately marches to the beat of her own drum. Anna in response to Michaela's statement said, "Well she has parts of each of us."

She went on to say, "She can be grumpy like Michaela, she can be a pest like Jake, and she is like me as well". I looked at her and asked, "In what way is she like you?" Anna smiled and said, "She is extraordinary."

I had to laugh. Yes, she is indeed like her sister - Extraordinary. These two extraordinary sisters are "best buddies" as Emily would say. They even have a best buddy walk they do where they put their arms around each other's waist and step together at the same time. I am very proud of Anna being so kind to her little sister. There is a 4.5 year age difference between the girls and, for the most part, Anna doesn't let it get in the way.

We are very blessed that all four kids get along really well. In this day and age that can be extraordinary.

The Best Buddies and their Best Brother!

Ahoy Matey!

2010-04-29T11:36:00.000-07:00

Anna and Emily decided to play pirates last night. The game has lasted into today! They build their ship named the Queen Anna's Revenge in the den. Their pirate names are Captain Crystal (Anna) and Seashell Sally (Emily).

There is nothing quiet like hearing your 4 year old voicing, "Walk the plank, ya scurvy dog!"

They wanted to go on a treasure hunt so I made them a map and "hid" some treasure. Anna brought me a show box for the treasure chest. After a long search they found the secret treasure hidden in Hot As Fire Cave other wise known as they dryer!

It is great to see them using their imagination and playing together sweetly.

At the Crossroads

2010-04-23T18:53:00.000-07:00

I stood at the crossroads with a storm approaching from so many sides. I had a decision to make and wasn't sure which direction to go. How do you make a decision on which way to proceed when you don't know what lies beyond what you can see? As I scanned the landscape hoping to glimpse something that would tell me which way to go forward I noticed a man sitting along side the road. He looked like he had traveled this way before. I approached him slowly and with some trepidation. Would he be able to help or would I be able to trust what he told me? I just knew I had to find the right way and couldn't face any more disappointment and shattered road ways.

As I approached him, he smiled and said, "Hello".

"Sir", I replied, "Can you tell me what lies beyond the crossroads or which way I should go?"

He stared at me for a while and then began, "funny thing isn't it standing at a crossroads or on any road for that matter not sure what lies ahead?"

He continued, "You never know how standing at a road can change your life. There was a blind man that stood beside a road calling out for help. One day a man walked along that road on his final journey into a city. The blind man realized who was walking by and cried out for the man to help him. Many around him tried to silent him, but he continued to cry out until the man turned and spoke to him and healed him. The thing about it is if he had let the crowd silence him or had lost his courage he would have lost his chance to see. For you see the man that had the power to heal him was alive but several days more and then was killed."

I stood there mesmerized at the story the man told. In his story was a blind man that could see even less than I did and yet he knew he had to cry out for help and have the courage to call on the one that could help him.

So, I responded, "I feel like that blind man. Though I can see where I am, I am not able to see the direction I should head in or what I will face."

He responded, "what did the blind man do?"

"He cried out", I responded.

"So why is it I have not heard anything from before you approached the crossroads or since you have been standing here for quite a while? In reality the first words from you came in response to a greeting from a stranger just standing here."

"But I didn't see anyone at first and what good what it do to call out into a darkened sky?"

"Is that not the same thing the blind man in my story faced? He had the once chance for the man that could heal him would not pass that way again."

I realized he was right. I had figured there would be a sign, that I would know where to go. The reality is I was just as blind as the man but I was also less in that I had convinced myself I had no other option or choice.

I looked at the man and said, "to whom did the blind man call out to?"

"Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!"

I realized right then and there that I had to give my journey over to the only one who could see for where I was headed, the only one who could guide me safely home.

I stood there as tears silently and softly trailed down my face. It is an amazing moment when you begin to "see" the journey from a new perspective.

"Sir, could you please tell me your name so I can thank you properly?"

"Don't thank me, thank the Master of the Road - Jesus, Son of David, the one who gives mercy to those that call out to Him. The one that can give sight to the blind no matter from where the blindness comes from. The one that journeys with those that call out to Him.

"And your name sir?"

He smiled and said, "My name is Bartimaeus."

Standing in the Gap

2010-04-21T14:45:00.000-07:00

I know many of us have people we know whether they are family or friends that seem to be incapable of lifting themselves out of the dark times in their lives or the valleys they seem to stay in. Times when depression seems to cloud everything and hope seems so far a way and at times nonexistent. Many times these people would love to find a way out but just can't seem to find it and we feel so helpless in how to help them.

It is a difficult place to be in when all you can really do is pray. Sometimes just being able to pray seems so confining and frustrating. There is power in it but at times it is still difficult. I think it isn't so much just being able to pray but realizing that it is beyond our control and it is in God's hands.

How do we deal with knowing it is out of our control? Knowing that no matter what we do we can not affect a real lasting change. Knowing that whatever small success we may see with a loved one, it is only temporary until the Great Physician is given the room to truly deal with the issue.

I am reminded of the times when my children would skin their knees or get a cut and I couldn't really doctor it until they would move their head out of the way from looking at it so I could really see what needed to be done. They had to look up and trust that I knew what I was doing. It is so difficult at times to look up and know that a loved ones difficulties are beyond me.

I think the conflict we feel is that at times our loved one will say that if we would do this or that things would be better and they might be for a time, but it is fleeting kind of aid like my child asking me to just blow on a scrape or just kiss it and it would be better. The reality is blowing on the wound or just kissing it won't fix it or clean it out. Real care has to be taken so the wound heals properly.

The case with a loved going through depression, a difficult time, loss, or any other valley is that we can and should be there for them but we have to be able to give God room to work. It can be a helpless feeling, but it doesn't have to be hopeless. Standing in the gap or walking through the valley is a place where we often have to remember it isn't about what we can do, but what God can do.

God's Call Revisited

2010-04-15T20:26:00.001-07:00

One day I was driving my son to our church's pre-school and we were discussing the story of Jonah. We discussed the fact that God had given Jonah a job to do and Jonah did not like the assignment so he chose to disobey God and ended up inside the whale. My son Jake seemed puzzled over the fact why God would do such a thing to Jonah since it was obvious Jonah did not like the job God gave him to do. He then asked, “Why doesn’t God do his own jobs?” After all, as he went on to say, “God can do anything.” After I looked for impending lightening bolts to come from heaven so I could dodge them, I sat there for a moment and thought about what my four year old had asked. It seemed incredulous that a question a then four year old had asked is the same question, most of us still ask today. I was glad that Jake was only four and so I felt a peace that God knew he wasn’t trying to be irreverent, but curious. But sadly that isn’t the case for most adults. It is such a simple question, but it carries a lot of meaning, as does the answer.

It is amazing how many people from the Bible have to have asked that question. “Why doesn’t God do his own jobs?” After all, this is the same God that created the universe, the sky, the sea, the animals, and people, sent his only son to die, and then raised him from the dead. The problems we as individuals and nations face should be a piece of cake to resolve. But that isn’t how things work. As we can see studying the Bible, God has usually used mere humans to bring about His plans and works.

Often when we think God is telling us to do something or take a certain path we begin to swim against the current. Like Jonah we begin to look for a destination in the opposite direction. We begin to say, “Surely I misunderstand what God is telling me”, or “I am not capable of that assignment – I don’t know how to (fill in the blank)”, or “God just doesn’t understand, I am not that strong of person”. There are countless other excuses we come up with and all have the underlying question of “Why me?”

Most people think a call from God is a big important job such as being called to be a missionary, a pastor, or other church leader. While these are calls from God they are not the only calls. In fact, God calls all Christians to be come like Christ.

Philippians 2:5 “Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:”

Micah 6:8 “He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.”

This means we are all called to do certain things. For example, all Christians are called to:

Share the Gospel Acts 1:8, Acts 2:32
Be faithful Stewards Matthew 25:21
Love our Neighbor Mark 12:31, Matthew 19:19, Galatians 5:14
Love God Luke 10:27

Regardless of our perceived talents or lack of talents we are all called to these opportunities. It is usually in this main focus of becoming like Christ that we are called to do something beyond what we expect or feel capable of doing.

Why don’t we often respond to God’s Call?

I have discovered it usually boils down to the Five I’s:

* Indifference

I really don’t feel compelled to…
Who cares?

* Insignificance

I am not important enough to…

* Inability

I am not capable to do…
I don’t know how to…
I have never done that before…

* Impossibility

You are asking the impossible
It has never been done before

* Insecurity

I am afraid
What will others think?

All of these responses are totally opposite to the reaction Christ had in his response to people, situations, and events. In fact all Christians do not have a reason to use any of the Five I’s as a response to a calling from God.

WHY?

* We are all significant in God’s eyes:

Jeremiah 1:5 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."

Psalms 139:13 “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.”

Hebrew 2:6 “But there is a place where someone has testified: "What is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?

* God will never ask more of us than we are capable of doing with his help:

Proverbs 2:8 “for he guards the course of the just and protects the way of his faithful ones.”

* With God’s help all things are possible:

Mark 9:23 'If you can'?" said Jesus. "Everything is possible for him who believes."

Mark 14:36 "Abba, Father," he said, "everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will."

Luke 18:27 “Jesus replied, ‘What is impossible with men is possible with God’."

* God is with us:

Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

* If we truly love and care, how can we be indifferent?

Luke 10:36-37 "Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?" The expert in the law replied, "The one who had mercy on him." Jesus told him, "Go and do likewise."

Revelation 3:16 “I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm--neither hot nor cold--I am about to spit you out of my mouth.”

God’s call in our lives is very important. Jesus had a call and he responded willingly even unto his death. In her book “Here am I send Aaron” Jill Briscoe writes about the last words Christ says on the cross. As he is dying Christ says, “It is finished.” What was finished? Surely his human life here was finished but there is more to it than that. Christ’s’ work here was finished as well. He came, lived, and completed the call God gave him. In her book Jill Briscoe goes onto ask how many of us could actually tell God “It is finished” upon on our death. Most of us, in fact the majority of us would sadly have to say we have not even responded to or started our work here.

Our call form God can be seemingly small and unimportant or obviously big, to somewhere in the middle. Every day we have the opportunity to change lives and situations by following God’s will.

Sunsets and Star Gazing

2010-04-11T18:56:00.000-07:00

We were invited to go on a star gazing journey last night up to Brasstown Bald, Georgia. It was a wonderful evening and night. A late night to be sure, but a fun and educational one. The kids got a chance to get out and see the night sky without the light pollution and with nature all around them. We watched the sun set and then waited and watched as the stars became clearer in the night sky! We were able to see a few planets through the telescope and even got to see the rings around Saturn! We also were able to see star clusters and several constellations!

It is amazing at how truly wonderful and awesome the night sky is with all the stars! It was wonderful to experience God's creation from a different perspective than the daytime one we are so familiar with in our usual schedule. I am glad we had the opportunity to get out and enjoy nature and the beautiful canvas of the night sky!

The Stealth Christian

2010-04-06T18:39:00.001-07:00

The Advancing Technology in Christianity in America – the Stealth Christian

stealth (n.) The act of moving, proceeding, or acting in a covert way.
stealth (n.) The quality or characteristic of being furtive or covert.

Go to any church in America for about 6 weeks and then request the church membership rolls and you will witness a phenomenon that permeates churches today – the Stealth Christian. People who come in and out of church in such a way as to fly without the radar picking them up. They come in to grab a sense of well being and then fly out without really giving anything back and don’t expect them to let their brief time in the Christian arena to have truly changed them in anyway. In many churches today you can have membership rolls which by their numbers would dictate that churches should be packed and doing financially well. The reality is that most churches are lucky to get a constant 50%-60% attendance by their “members” and if you expected it to be the same people every week that is a toss up as well.

Why this new Stealth mode for today’s “modern Christian”? For many, church has become a sort of buffet to help you feel good one day of the week and give you the idea that you are doing the right thing.

Average Stealth Christian: “Church? Yes, I go to church – it doesn’t really matter I have been one Sunday out of the last three, but I go to church.”

I am reminded of the line by the Queen Ant in the movie A Bugs Life, "It's the same every year, they come, they eat, they leave; that's our lot in life. It's not a lot, but it's our life." For so many they come to church, partake of the service and some fun things, then they leave. They may or may not come back the next week, but when they do: they come, they eat, they leave. They don’t give back financially, ministry wise, teaching wise, administratively, or any other number of ways churches need help.

In our “ME” focused world we have come to expect so much and give so little. The amazing thing in all of this is that it is so contrary to what Christ taught and so contrary to what God expects. We want to take the parts that we like and then adjust the parts we don’t like or ignore them all together. It is a good thing Christ doesn’t treat us like that.

We were not called to be Stealth Christians. How anyone can get that from Christ telling us to be light in a world of darkness, I can’t quite figure out. When he said in John 13:34-35,"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." Christ was expecting people to see a difference with us. I would ask those Stealth Christians how being stealth accomplishes this mission?

When you ask people why they don’t go to a church regularly or get involved you will hear a myriad of “reasons”:

· I don’t like being tied down to one church.
· I have to have some time to spend with my family.
· I am sure people won’t miss me if I am not there once a while.
· It was raining the past few weekends.
· I have small children and it is so difficult to get everyone up and ready that early on a weekend morning.
· I am not sure all it applies to me.
· I just didn’t get up in time.
· I just don’t relate to the people there.

You think it, and I am sure ministers and church lay people have heard it. For a true believer in Christ these are not acceptable reasons. If you find you can skip church and don’t feel missed or you don’t notice a negative difference in your walk, then you need to find a new church. If you don’t feel recharged, changed in some way, excited to get back, love the people in your church, then you need to get a new you and/or get a new church. Now, I know that churches have some areas they need to work on and in total fairness, my next blog entry will be about that. But, the bottom line is that many of us want to complain about or skip going to our church, but not do anything about getting in and helping out.

The Stealth Christian is a detriment to Christianity in America and the Church as a whole. They generally don’t study their Bible, aren’t truly sure of what God requires of us, and don’t feel joy because they are so focused on themselves. They expect much of pastors and lay leaders, but have no desire to give anything back. They feel entitled to church programs but don’t feel they should serve in them or give back financially. They want kids programs for their children at their convenience – just make sure they fit with their family’s schedule and don’t contradict with sports events or other extra curricular activities.

It is as if “Christians” in America feel like the church is a free buffet that you can come, pick and choose from it, feel “full” for some time, and then consider to go back to when you feel “hungry” or when your world falls apart and you need comfort. Yes, the church is also known for serving “comfort” food on its buffet and that is a real draw for people as well. The church was never and is never supposed to be the Starbucks of your life. Listening to people order in the coffee cafés of our time is amazing, but isn’t that what we expect in church today? Here is a scenario I think will show you what I mean:

Stealth Christian: I’ll have a short service heavy on the music, little preaching, fun stuff for my kids, and that quick shot of feeling good. No heavy accountability or sermons that challenge me.

Church Greeter: That will be $15.00 and you will need to spend at least 1 Sunday a quarter helping in the nursery.

Stealth Christian: $15.00 and a service contract? That is outrageous! I am at church right? It is supposed to be free and I don’t do service contracts.

If we don’t do “service contracts” then has our heart really been changed by Christ? God’s gift of salvation doesn’t come with a service clause, but because of what Christ did for us and the magnitude of it, we should want to serve - not because we have to, but because we want to.

If we come, we eat, we leave, what are we teaching the next generation and what are we leaving for them in the way of church? I think it is time we come, we learn, we change, and we serve. Stealth mode is great for a military going into enemy territory, but as Christians going into church, why do we need to act as if we are going into enemy territory and need to be invisible? Stand up, stand in, be accounted for and counted on.

The Great Omission Rewind

2010-04-05T06:47:00.000-07:00

Omission (n.)
1.the act of omitting.
2.the state of being omitted.
3.something left out, not done, or neglected: an important omission in a report.

In my last post I posted about the Stealth Christian. This post will cover how the modern church has contributed to the creation of the Stealth Christian. Even though believers ultimately have the responsibility for the depth of their relationship to Christ, the church bears responsibility in the creation of disciples and teaching people what God expects of them.

Through my years of involvement in churches and in talking with people, I have learned that there are major areas where the church has strayed off course in creating Visible and Viable Christians.

I think a true measurement of a successful church is not measured by how many people attend the church or have been baptized in the last three years. For the church, Spiritual Success should be reflected in how many of those converts are actively serving in the church and witnessing in their community. Based on the Great Commission in Matthew 16:18-20, I believe God judges His Church on two tasks:

1 raising believers up out the water
2. making sure they are led to a daily walk with Him.

It seems as though many churches have forgotten the second half of the Great Commission. It is almost as if the latter half of it has become the Great Omission.

There are so many churches across America where the membership rolls do not truly reflect how many people are consistently and actively involved in participating and serving in their church. There are mega-churches, micro-churches, and somewhere in the middle churches regarding sizes of members and concrete structures. Today many people consider a 20,000 "member" church to be a “successful” church. However, let's take a closer look at this. If it were just a numbers game, then the Church should be well and alive in America, but the reality is it is diminishing. Can we really say that a 20,000 "member" church is successful if they only have about a 50-60% attendance rate? Or if only about 20% of their members are actually involved in serving in the church?

Mega churches have grown in this country and while there are some positives to them they strongly contribute to the Stealth Christian in that they give them a safe place to hide with very little accountability or responsibility. But it isn't just mega churches with the problem. Churches of all sizes are struggling with this. The bottom line is a church should not define its success based on the rolls of "members" it has. But since we have to quantify things somehow in this day and age, why not make the numbers success based on the total number of members with at least an 80% attendance rate during a year, and an over all 70% serving rate of all its church body? How would "successful" churches rate then? If I have a company and only 50% of its employees show up and only 20% of the people do the work that is necessary, my business will not be successful. Why should the church be considered successful if this is the case? We need to reevaluate how we are quantifying and defining success in the American church.

Secondly, the other standard often used is how many baptisms are done in a year in a church. The focus on this number has caused the church to lose its focus on one of its most important callings - teaching people to be disciples and what it truly means to be a disciple. Far too many churches raise a new Christian up out of the water and leave them standing in the same spot so that soon they are standing in a puddle from the water dripping off instead of seeing wet foot prints leading away from the spot. The church is in such a hurry to "save" people that we aren't truly showing them what this means or training them to develop a relationship with Christ. If the church focused not only on the journey to the cross, but also from the cross to the transformation, to the resurrection our churches would be in better shape. Jesus' disciples were with him three years, sitting at his feet, learning through their mistakes, seeing Jesus interact with others. Why are we so quick to throw a quick new member or new Christian class at a new believer and think the job is done? The journey from the cross begins there but continues until our last breath. Why do we focus the success on the beginning, getting the person on the road, but not constantly checking with them, teaching them, mentoring them, and encouraging them?

The journey to a deep relationship with Christ takes time and if we ignore the journey what good did getting on the road do for the new believer? Oh, that's right - well at least they are going to heaven. Is this what it has become "fire insurance"? Or as a church aren't we supposed to focus on making sure our members not just get there, but get there and hear, "Well done, good and faithful servant.” Has the church become like a burger giant with over a billion served? Shouldn't the church be claiming a billion serving?

If we want to see stronger churches, we have to have stronger Christians. We can't build a strong or successful Church with a body plagued with Stealth Christians. Only through Viable and Visible Christians can we be successful.

Let's get real - the message hasn't changed, we have changed in how we respond to the message. The message of Christ should drive us, not us drive the message. We were called to be lights in a world of darkness, we were called to help the least of these, we were called to love our enemies and our neighbor as ourselves, we were called to be different and let others see the difference in our lives as a testimony to a living savior. We were called to draw people to Him, not have them drift away because they don’t find the reality of His message in the Church.

Christ saves people, we should take them by the hand after that and lead them to a better understanding of what their new life requires of them and also gives them. It requires sacrifice and courage but they will also know a new life and a more abundant life. The journey is never easy, but we will never make it to the "well done faithful servant" unless we are faithful with what He has given the Church - new and not so new believers.

While ultimately it is the individual believer that will have to answer to God for his or her lack of involvement in furthering the kingdom of God, I believe as believers we will share some of the responsibility as well. We are to be about our Father's business, the business is one that encompasses more than filling pews, and making sure we get as many people to wade through the baptismal pool. We should be about getting them in the pew, through the pool, and becoming perfected in Him.

Passover

2010-04-01T11:30:00.000-07:00

We have been going through a study called Celebrating Jesus in the Biblical Feasts by Dr. Richard Booker, with some friends in a small group. This has been an eye opening and interesting study. We are studying how the different Biblical Feasts the Israelites celebrated pointed to Christ. We celebrated Passover last night with a Passover Seder. It was a wonderful time with friends and a time focused on God and His provision to us through Jesus, the ultimate sacrificial lamb. The kids enjoyed it as well.

I have been amazed through this study how much we often miss the message in Jesus as the Passover Lamb. It is such a beautiful way to celebrate the Easter Season instead of getting lost in plastic grass, bunnies, and eggs. Anna, our eight year old asked why we hadn't done this before. She really enjoyed it as did the other kids. Emily the youngest didn't quite like the parsley dipped in salt water that she ate, but overall it was a wonderful experience for them.

I am glad they had the opportunity to experience this and I hope it is an event that turns into a tradition.

Some Fun Snapshots of a Fun Spring Day!

2010-03-27T21:25:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we headed out today to go to an Easter Egg hunt at a church we planned to visit today. After that we ran a few errands and went to the park for a picnic supper. It was so pretty today in Georgia, a rare treat lately with all the rain we have had of late, so we took advantage of the wonderful spring day.

Here are some pictures of the girls we took here and there. Somehow, Jake managed to escape a photo yesterday. I will have to add some of him later.

There is an interesting story about Mr. Wooly above, but I will save that for another day. Just to give you a little bit of information, the sheep was a door prize at the Easter Egg hunt! I will write about it later this week!

Where are Such Great Minds Today?

2010-03-17T08:11:00.000-07:00

The Constitution is not an instrument for the government to restrain the people, it is an instrument for the people to restrain the government." Patrick Henry

"If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of currency, first by inflation, then by deflation, the banks and corporations that will grow up around them will deprive the people of all property until their children wake up homeless on the continent their fathers conquered." Thomas Jefferson

"We, the people are the rightful masters of both Congress and the courts, not to overthrow the Constitution, but to overthrow men who pervert the Constitution." Abraham Lincoln

"The money powers prey upon the nation in times of peace and conspire against it in times of adversity. It is more despotic than a monarchy, more insolent than autocracy, and more selfish than bureaucracy. It denounces as public enemies, all who question its methods or throw light upon its crimes. I have two great enemies, the Southern Army in front of me and the Bankers in the rear. Of the two, the one at my rear is my greatest foe.. corporations have been enthroned and an era of corruption in high places will follow, and the money powers of the country will endeavor to prolong its reign by working upon the prejudices of the people until the wealth is aggregated in the hands of a few, and the Republic is destroyed." Abraham Lincoln

"Our constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other." John Adams

True Friends - What a Wonderful Blessing!

2010-03-15T13:44:00.000-07:00

But oh! the blessing it is to have a friend to whom one can speak fearlessly on any subject; with whom one's deepest as well as one's most foolish thoughts come out simply and safely. Oh, the comfort - the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person - having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik, A Life for a Life, 1859

A true friend unbosoms freely, advises justly, assists readily, adventures boldly, takes all patiently, defends courageously, and continues a friend unchangeably. ~William Penn

But friendship is precious, not only in the shade, but in the sunshine of life, and thanks to a benevolent arrangement the greater part of life is sunshine. ~Thomas Jefferson

On His Team

2010-03-11T12:19:00.000-08:00

My kids and I were returning from the house of some dear friends today and we were discussing helping others. Our 8 year old, Anna said that, "we help others because Jesus helps us." The four year old, Emily pipes up and says, "I like Jesus." Then Anna went on to say that, "God gives us power". She went on to say, "that God is like our cheerleader cheering us on." To which her brother responded, "No, He is more like our coach and our parents are our cheerleaders". Anna then said, "yes that is right". "Our parents help us out with our homework and take care of us," she went onto say. "God is in charge and the one at the top."

I have never quite thought about it that way but there is truth to that. I think as parents we take turns as cheerleaders and assistant coaches, but we can never replace the Real Coach. The One that should be calling the shots, the plays, and the direction for our kids.

The one thing about being an assistant coach or cheerleader is you are an active participant and not a spectator. You have a job and if you want to see the team do well you have to get your mind in the game. You have to make sure the kids see plenty of opportunities to practice and they have to know the Playbook by heart.

We need to keep cheering them on toward a higher goal and helping them go forward when things are difficult. When they cross the goal at the end of the game and step out of time and into eternity, we want them to be able to face the Head Coach knowing they did the best they could do and that they gave their best effort for His team. It isn't about a trophy, but hearing the Head Coach say, "Well done!"

One of those days...

2010-03-06T11:27:00.001-08:00

Here is what happens when you give an almost 12 year old boy two balloons and a few minutes while he waits for his sisters to get ready to run errands...

You just have to love static cling and a boy's way of looking at things!

Reconsidering Carry On Baggage

2010-02-28T19:08:00.001-08:00

"For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness."
Ralph Waldo Emmerson

I would venture to say we all have tons of stuff we carry around each day apart from the normal grocery, Target, and Walmart bags of stuff. We carry around our memories, our experiences, our dreams, and ideas. But most of us also carry around much heavier things like sorrow, bitterness, anger, and unforgiven transgressions that just weigh us down. I think the contemporary term is “emotional baggage”. How many carry ons do we have? Is our emotional baggage made by the Boomerang Corporation, you try to lose it but it just keeps coming back?

We shouldn’t keep anger, bitterness in strife in our lives. It becomes oppressive and just keeps us in knots. It is like carrying around excess luggage that doesn’t benefit us. We all have experience and times that make us angry. Sometimes it is at other people or other situations and sometimes we are angry for other people we think that have been mistreated. Anger when worked toward something good is a good thing, but few of us use it for that. We hold onto it let it fester, add it to past grievances, and let it take root in our minds and hearts. It is like the quote: "Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the only one who gets burned. "

We need to let our anger and bitterness go. Let it out and not let it poison our hearts and minds. Anger is a natural response but shouldn’t be a natural condition. Don’t let your emotional baggage keep returning. This is one time you don’t need to put on a return address. We can’t truly love others and ourselves while we harbor bitterness and resentment. Life isn’t always fair, people don’t always act they way we wish they would, and things don’t always end up the way we want them too, and we don’t always have control, but we do control how we react and deal with things.

If you are harboring anger, resentment, and bitterness don’t be an accessory or victim to their crimes, kick them out, call in the joy police and go forward. We can’t fly without paying a penalty if we are over the limit on carry on baggage, the same applies in life with emotional baggage. We will pay a penalty if we carry too much.

Would you?

2010-02-20T16:26:00.000-08:00

What would you do if you knew within your circle of friends one would betray you, one would deny you, most of them would take a while to truly understand you, some of them would argue over who should be closer to you, and in general they would question your ideas and the things you told them? What if you knew exactly which one would do each thing? Would you still have called them friend? Would you still have chosen to become close to them, confide in them, and spend time with them?

Most of us if not all of us would say, no. We don't want to have those kinds of friends. We have a definition of friend that generally doesn't include someone who betrays us or denies our relationship, and in reality who wants friends that don't understand us?

Many years ago twelve men were called friend by Christ and He knew everyone one of them and yet, He called them to Him and called them friend.

The question is if you knew then what you know now about those you have called and do call friend, would you still have forged on with a relationship with them?

I know twelve men are so glad He did. Aren't you?

The Vessel

2010-01-17T18:54:00.000-08:00

I hurried about the Potter's shop working here and there
There was so much work to do that I whizzed around not taking care.
When suddenly a vessel fell and cracked upon the floor.
I stopped mid-step with fear and dread and began to feel the horror

For much care he always gave as he moved about his shop
Always making sure that he handled things as if there was no spare
I picked the vessel up and looked as if in a stare.
There were cracks with pieces missing that I was sure there was no repair.

How clumsy and how careless I had been.
Oh, how I wish I could make time go back again.
There was nothing that could be done, the vessel now was broken
I did not hear the potter come in until his voice had spoken.

What are you staring at and what is in your hand?
Scared and timid I look up without an answer planned.
I knew he expected honesty and so with my courage failing
I showed him the cracked vessel upon which I had been dwelling.

"I am so sorry sir", was all I could muster and a tear ran down my cheek.
I was afraid to look right at him so all I could do was peek.
"You left me in charge to watch your shop and in my hurry I lost all care.
It is broken now and I believe beyond repair".

To my surprise he looked and smiled
and seem to address me as if I was his child
"Yes, the vessel looks broken in your eyes,
But to mine it appears to hold more than it implies"

"But, sir though it is still all together it has lost all of its value
Just look at it, it seems to be without the ability to do what it was meant to do.
There are so many cracks some big and others small
But not just that, there are holes about the vessel and now it won't hold anything at all."

He looked upon my worried and tear stained face and bid me sit beside him
I didn't understand what he had in mind as the light was becoming dim.
Then from a lamp near on the floor he took a candle
I wasn't sure what he thought he was doing since his efforts seemed quite futile

He put the candle down inside it and found some kindling sticks
He lit one and put it in the broken pottery with all its cracks and nicks
All of a sudden light poured from the once ugly vessel
I stared in wonderment at what I saw that had made me so humble

This couldn't be the same old broken pottery
Light poured through every crack and hole so mightily
The pattern of light was unique and didn't shine in all the same places
It seemed as though light had filled all the empty spaces

I don't understand how could something so broken be so beautiful now?
How could something so damaged and seemingly beyond repair be more now that it was just a bit ago, I started to avow
With kind and understanding eyes the potter looked at me and began to speak,
"Most pottery starts out seemingly whole but over time all pottery becomes weak.

It usually falls, gets bumped, and often dropped, it gets nicks and cracks and rarely stays unblemished
But just because it isn't perfect doesn't mean its value is diminished.
With each unique crack and whatever size whole becomes a new piece of artwork waiting to unfold.
For if you put a candle in a piece seemingly whole, how would you see the light shining, it could not shine so bold?

It is only with the cracks and through the holes that light can shine through and let others see
That there is more to this vessel than just plain old pottery.
There is the ability to shine a light from within and guide others to safety and show them the way,
There is the ability to show others that though they may be worn or broken there is no reason to stray."

I looked at the vessel and began to understand that the cracks and the valleys in my life that I felt made me less,
Were really opportunities to shine His light and to others bless.
It isn't the cracks and the holes others see when the light of the Shepherd burns from within,
It is the light of His grace and love without end that draws others close and calls them to Him

I looked at the Potter and began to see that his love for his craft was really His love for me.
Though I had damaged the vessel and his piece of art
What he was really concerned about was really my heart
And though the vessel be marred and rejected, with His saving grace and Light we are perfected.

A Way Home...

2009-12-17T21:59:00.000-08:00

I remember when I was learning to drive. It is one of those experiences that I always looked forward to in high school, but once I was in it, I dreaded it at times. I didn't mind so much when I practiced with my mom, but my dad was another story. I always wanted to do so well when I went out driving with dad, but I always felt those were the times I did the worst. I am sure the pressure I put on myself didn't help, but I usually came away from those times thinking public transportation might not be so bad afterall.

I remember one time in particular where my dad decided he would take me out to practice driving. He drove first and drove us to some point and then told me to drive home. I had not been paying attention and had no idea how to get back home. I remember he was angry and I got a lecture on paying attention and how important it was that I knew where I was and how to find my way home. I managed to drive back home with him giving me directions, but I remember feeling humiliated and once again, was wondering if we lived near a bus route.

It is interesting how situations in our lives can remain so vivid and make such an impact. The other thing that is interesting is how God can use those circumstances years later to show us something. At times I have felt as if God was so far away. I know in reality He has not moved, I have. The interesting thing is He has always given me a clear way back home. I don't have to wonder how to get there or how to find my way back. I only need to drop to my knees and open my heart to Him. I have to reach out and call to Him and I will find Him. I don't have to wait or wonder, I just have to pray.

I did manage to get my driver's license and I never had to get a bus schedule, but I did learn to pay attention, to know where I was going, and how to get back. Those lessons have been useful when I have moved or gone on trips. The funny thing about life is you don't always know where you are going, but God is always able to give directions, and always makes a way home for us.

In this time of year when we reflect on a baby born in a manger. It is incredible to believe that even before I was born, God had a plan to make a way home for me. A way for me to come home that broke down any barriers. A way home that comes through love and grace and because God was willing to sacrifice His son. It is awesome to comprehend that a baby born over two thousand years ago still provides a way home today!

Our way home doesn't start with a GPS, a map, a disgruntled father, or by putting the car in gear - our journey home begins when we realize He is standing at the door and knocking and we open the door and let Him come in. Our way Home begins at the manger and goes through the cross.

The Holiday Season

2009-12-17T20:22:00.000-08:00

We have been trying to make this holiday season fun for the kids. Our family has been on a difficult journey for the last few months. Between illnesses and changes we could not have forseen we have all been walking on a winding and at times bumpy road. I know God is in control and that we will all come out on the other side stronger and wiser, but sometimes the going through isn't fun or easy. Many times when God wants us to grow and head in a new direction it isn't always comfortable, but it is doable with Him.

So, that being said, we have tried to get out and do some things with the kids to make our journey a little more pleasant.

Here are a few things we have done:

Light Show:

Matthew West Concert with Bob and Larry:

We have also gone through a Walk Through Bethlehem at our neighbor's church and have even done some fun things at home. Anna made a Happy Birthday Jesus cake this week.

We are trying to keep Christ as the focus in what we are doing as well as spending quality time as a family. I know in the years to come the kids may not remember what they got for Christmas this year, but I know they will have memories to look back on to take with them the rest of their life. They say the best gift we can often give is ourselves well I think that is especially true when it comes to our children. Spending time with them is something that never wears out or gets old.

If we only could remember that through the year. It isn't so much the things we buy, but the time we spend and how we spend it.

"An Explosion..."

2009-12-05T07:40:00.000-08:00

We have a wonderful three year old who will turn four next month. She is definitely a terrific part of our family. Just like her brother and sisters she brings her own uniqueness to our family. She is very shy in public and around people she doesn't know very well, but once you get her in a comfortable environment with people she knows, she just doesn't know how to be quiet. She talks and talks and talks. This has only been a recent occurrence as she seemed to be a very quiet and shy child even around people she knew up until about September. Since then the flood gates have opened!

She has a wonderful way of looking at things and being the forth child is always attempting to keep up with her older siblings. She particularly loves doing school when they are doing school. One of the great things about homeschooling is having them learn together and along side of each other. She loves to be big and have school time as well. I generally take some time with her and work just with her on her letters, numbers, and other preschool types of things. Well this week she wanted to do an "spirment" (otherwise known as an experiment).

I got some great durable test tubes that I have and some dye tablets and decided we would work with colors and seeing what colors were formed when you mixed them. So we filled up 3 tubes with water and dropped a red tablet in one, a blue tablet in another and a yellow tablet in the last one. So now we had all the primary colors. We took 3 more test tubes and mixed a little of red and yellow and made orange and so forth. Emily was really enjoying this. We finally had six tubes with different colors in each. I thought this was going well.

Then Emily says, "Can we do another spirment"? I replied, "another one?" She then said, "yes, let's make an explosion - an explosion of an abomination!" I told her there would be no explosions in the house regular or the type involving an abomination. Funny how her favorite word right now happens to be "abomination". You can tell she enjoys spending time with her older siblings.

I just love the time I get to spend with my kids! I am so thankful for it!

Well I am trying to come up with another "spirment" for this week and think I have found it. NO, there are no explosions but I am thinking over the Christmas holidays we should build a volcano. I would love to see how she reacts to that. We could dye the "lava" red. Maybe we can have it run over some green trees. :)

The Tears of a Child

2009-12-01T20:09:00.000-08:00

I think one of the most difficult things to deal with as a mother is the sadness and tears of a child. They can be tears over a scrape or an injury, or the emotional hurt of a friend moving or a change in their life they weren't expecting.

I can honestly say that since having children I have learned more about my Heavenly Father than I ever had before and ever could have on my own. My children have shown me a depth of love I had not known before them. It is that kind of love that wants to take the hurt away knowing that I can't and knowing that the best I can can do is just hug them and cry with them at times.

How do you get a child to understand that God understands what they are feeling? That there is a plan in what they are going through and that every tear that falls He is aware of. How do you explain, that it is ok to be upset but that you still have to be in control of your actions and how you express your frustration?

I think sometimes as adults we are often too afraid to hurt, to afraid to truly deal with our emotions. I think sometimes the reactions and feelings of a child are so much more real than ours. Some would say that as we get older that we learn to control our emotions and that emotions give way to reason and logic. I think that we have lost too much of our dealings with emotion in our attempt to reduce hurt and pain and seem more in control.

We shouldn't cry at the drop of hat or over spilled milk, but when we are hurting or feel a loss, or just plain disconnected from those in our life or with our life, I think it is okay to feel. It is just as okay to feel pain and loss as we are able to feel happy or excited about something. Why is it we are fine with happy, but steer clear of pain? Can we have one without the other? In order to understand happiness or joy, don't we have to know how we have to know what it is like to feel the opposite way?

As I learn to better help my children through the sometimes painful sides of life, I learn that it is emotion that makes us who we are. It is emotion that sent God to send His only son to die on the cross for mankind. It is the powerful emotion of love that makes a difference. If we are to love as God commanded us to love, how can we not feel emotion at the loss of a friendship, the death of a loved one, the separation from those we love, the injury of another, the difficulties of our neighbors, and all the other situations in life that should make us feel?

Sometimes we have to let go and actually accept that feeling love, feeling loss, feeling joy, and feeling pain, are actually gifts. Gifts that can help us relate, reach out, reach in, and reach toward heaven.

As I sit and hug a crying child, I am glad that they are able to feel. Glad that I am able to feel so many emotions as I attempt to console them. I am also glad that I have a Heavenly Father that understands my emotions, loves my child and me, and knows that even though we feel sad for this moment in time, that light will come after a night of darkness and there will be joy in the morning.

Let it Shine

2009-11-19T06:29:00.000-08:00

Our family took a walk through one of the wonderful parks in our area this past weekend. As we were walking we came upon this beautiful little tree that was all decked out in yellow.

As I looked closer, I began to realize that it was the only thing around that was colorful. The rest of the landscape looked brown and gray and sort of lifeless. I was reminded of the verse in Matthew 5:16, "In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." The other verse that came to mind was Luke 11:36, "Therefore, if your whole body is full of light, and no part of it dark, it will be completely lighted, as when the light of a lamp shines on you."

It struck me as here was a an actual vivid example of a "light" shining among the darkness. It is what we as Christians should be in a world of darkness.

I will have to admit I haven't felt like shining for the past couple of months. Our family has been through a challenging and soul searching time. It has been more like I have focused more on the circumstances of things and let them sort of block the light within me. I began to see this small tree as God's gentle reminder that though things can look dark and challenging around me that I was still required to reflect His light and His love.

I was reminded of Joseph being sold into slavery by his brothers and going into Egypt, not by his own choice but by the choices of others and his circumstances. He didn't choose to go, but ended up there anyway. Even with the hardships he faced, he still trusted God and still reflected God's love and faithfulness in what he did from the prison to the palace. We all have Egypt experiences in our lives where we end up somewhere we hadn't planned on being or that we want to be, but we have to stay lit. We have to be faithful in our circumstances. We have to remember that what can be meant for harm can be worked for good through God.

I am often amazed at the small ways God reaches out to me and speaks to me. I have been trying to reboot my enthusiasm and spiritual mindset for several weeks and just couldn't seem to get back on track. It was like trying to get a wet wood back into a roaring flame. The flame never went out, just was having a hard time refueling. I think times like these are teachable times if we allow them to be.

A long time ago in a desert a shepherd's life was changed by a burning bush. This past weekend, my life was shaped and redirected by another well "lit" bush that seemed to refuse to know it was time to go dormant for winter.

In this week before Thanksgiving, I am thankful for a God who is always loving and faithful and never leaves me in the dark, without shining a light to show me the way forward.

"Arise, shine, for your light has come,
and the glory of the LORD rises upon you." Isaiah 60:1

Monkey in the Middle

2009-09-29T17:24:00.000-07:00

One of my least favorite games when I was growing up was Monkey in the Middle. I am sure many people have played it. It is a game where someone is in the middle of two people. The two people on the outside take toss something like a ball between them and try to keep the person in the middle from getting it. Usually the person in the middle is chosen to be in the middle because they are shorter, younger, or slower than the other two people. If by chance the person in the middle gets the item being tossed back in forth they become one of the people tossing the ball. Being the "Monkey" in the middle is usually not fun. I remember many times when I could end up in the middle for quite a while.

The weird thing is as an adult I often feel like I am in the "middle" again. I am between a rock and hard place, two decisions, friends that are not on the best of terms or stuck in the middle of a situation. It is as if life is a never ending series of Monkey in the Middle games where your truly has taken on the role of the monkey again.

I generally try to find out how to deal with my issues in life from a Biblical perspective but wasn't able find a reference to monkeys in the Bible. What I did find was example of others who had found themselves in the middle of conflict or in the middle of difficult relationships. The one that I can relate to right now is Jonathan. Jonathan was torn between a father who was king and his best friend David. He knew that his father was set on killing David, but he also knew that David was God's chosen to lead Israel. Jonathan was in the middle.

Sometimes even in the "middle" is a very lonely place. You wouldn't think it is since there are others around you, but it can be lonely. I think at times it is in the "middle" places of life that we especially need God to give us our bearing and focus. If we chase to one side or the other trying to grab hold of something or do it on our own we only get frustrated and tired. Focusing on God helps us see Him and not the game going on around us.

Between a rock and a hard spot is where the Israelites found themselves after leaving Egypt. Egyptians behind them and the Red Sea in front of them. The God of then is the God of today and He is still capable of guiding His children through these kinds of circumstances.

I think at this point in my life when I feel like I am about to go bananas, I know I just need to focus on Him and know that He will guide me through to the other side.

Finding Peace

2009-09-01T07:11:00.000-07:00

"In all my perplexities and distresses, the Bible has never failed to give me light and strength." Robert E. Lee

I found this quote this morning when I was reading through something. I think it is wonderful! I have also found that in times of "perplexities and distresses" that leaning on God is very comforting. God is not a God of confusion and if we are confused and frustrated we need to give it to God and seek guidance from Him.

I have been at peace at times in my life when it just didn't seem like it should be possible. I have found when I am not at peace it is becomes I am not handling things Biblically or I am relying on others or myself to figure it out.

We all have times in our life that are perplexing and distressing, but we have to make sure we keep focused on God and doing things according to His will. Not an easy task always, but very worthwhile and peace inducing.

When Silence Isn't Golden

2009-08-30T11:45:00.000-07:00

He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.
— George Herbert

Have you ever experienced the kind of silence that truly screams at you when it is caused by a gap or break in a relationship? It is the kind of thing that seems to consume you and leave you asking what went wrong, what did I do, or why? When you are use to the rhythm of a relationship where you share your joys, sorrows, frustrations, ups, and downs, and then all the sudden nothingness, the silence it causes can be deafening.

It is as if the absence of a friend and their relationship leaves a large pothole in the road of life you can’t seem to get around it. Partially because you want the pothole fixed and partially because in life a really good friend is a hard to find. To go right over or around it and keep going without trying to fix it seems cold and immature. The problem is with these kind of potholes you have to have help from the other person to fix it and sometimes that is difficult.

I think that sometimes we allow the Gorilla that caused the pothole to become bigger than need be. Why is it as women we often are leery of letting a friend know they have hurt us or done something that has caused us to question our friendship? We generally are able to tell others about it, but not let the one person who could fix it know. I have found many times that the other person isn’t really aware of what it is and would fix it if they knew. Why do we let it fester instead of just being open about what is bugging us? Do we hope that with time it will all go away and we won’t have to deal with it?

I think that as mothers and women in our children’s lives we need to deal with issues a little more openly and honestly but lovingly as well. We all want to be dealt with fairly when we make mistakes and mess up so we should deal with others the same way. I would hope that we all give others the chance to make amends or find out what they did that was wrong. Sometimes it is just miscommunication and we all know what happens when we assume or are given incorrect information.

So today, I would challenge you if you have a Gorilla or his handiwork slowing your journey through life, stop and deal with it with love. The road of life is bumpy enough without having to deal with major potholes.

I wrote this a couple of years ago when I was going through some issues with a friend. The issues were resolved and I can gladly say we are still close friends! I think sometimes we need to reflect on this to keep it from being an issue. God Bless!

The Stones Fell at Their Feet

2009-08-27T09:25:00.000-07:00

They stood in a circle, a group of men who knew the law and knew they had a case. This is what they had waited for. A chance to show their power, their knowledge of the law, and their "outrage". This was a chance to remedy a growing problem and carry out justice in their mind.

As they approached the "judge" with confidence in their stride and their faces registering a victory, they drug their victim along. They didn't seem phased by her tears and there was no sympathy in their harsh treatment. They hauled her up before the group and thrust her in front of the "judge".

"Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?"

With that silence fell, the kind of silence that seems the loudest. The kind that waits for a response that will change the course of history. The "judge" addressed as "teacher" bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger as if the mob around him was not there. They pressed further as if the drums of victory were beating louder in their hearts. They had to have a response, they had to be justified in what they "knew" was right. They pressed again.

The "judge" addressed as teacher stood up and looked at them. Silence fell again. But this time it was totally silent. Nature even seemed to stand still to listen to His response. He looked at them and said with authority that was like no other, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her."

Silence for a moment, and then there was the small sound of something falling to the ground and dust flying up in a small cloud. Another small thud and then the sounds of feet retreating from the scene - first a few and then others. The mob dispersed as if the first stone, that fell at their feet, had rippled across the crowd and sent them slowly and reflectively in another direction.

When the crowd had gone, the teacher looked up at the accused and said,"Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?"

"No one, sir," she said.
"Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."

There are enough issues attacking churches and Christians today that we don't need to implode from within by letting emotion crowd judgement, letting pride proceed penitence, and letting desire for control conquer compassion. We need to let the stones of discord fall at our feet and seek forgiveness for our issues before we let the stones in our hand become obstacles to our relationships with others and God.

Again, let us take in the words of Jesus:

"If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her."
...
"Has no one condemned you?"

"No one, sir," she said.
"Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared.
"Go now and leave your life of sin."

These are the times...

2009-08-25T21:04:00.003-07:00

I do not remember many of the quotes or passages I was required to memorize when I was in elementary or middle school. I do remember two probably because I can often apply them to my life. The two are the poem “If” by Rudyard Kipling and an article by Thomas Paine written during America’s Revoutionary War period. The beginning of one of Paine’s articles is one many of you will remember once you have read it. The following is the beginning of an article:

“These are the times that try men's souls. The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of their country; but he that stands by it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and woman. Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly: it is dearness only that gives every thing its value. Heaven knows how to put a proper price upon its goods;…”

I have often quoted the first sentence, “These are the times that try men’s souls.” on many occasions in my life, especially as a parent or as a wife. We all have those times that try our souls. I think that Paine is correct in giving credit to those who would give service to their country but I also think this passage could apply to our lives as Christians. There are so many times as a parent, a spouse, a friend we are tried and that we have to make decisions and do things that others are not necessarily thankful for at the time. Evil, like tyranny, is hell and is not easily conquered. In addition, like the tyranny Paine talks about, the battle with evil is not an easy one, but once we have conquered it the triumph is glorious.

We all face those less enchanting times in our lives that try us, and that the work we do is not appreciated. This is especially true for those that work to further God’s kingdom here on earth. Our pastors, Sunday school teachers, missionaries, prayer warriors, and all those who reach out to others in the name of Jesus are often tried. In 2 Timothy Paul writes about this.

2 Timothy 4
1In the presence of God and of Christ Jesus, who will judge the living and the dead, and in view of his appearing and his kingdom, I give you this charge: 2Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction. 3For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. 4They will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths. 5But you, keep your head in all situations, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, discharge all the duties of your ministry.
6For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure. 7I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 8Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.

Paul challenges us to keep going and know that though we often feel as if we aren’t making a difference or that our work here is not appreciated; God knows what we are facing and He will reward those who continue on despite the struggles.

I hope this weekend as you head off to church that you will let your pastors, teachers, choir directors, nursery workers, prayer warriors, etc. know that you appreciate the work they do. We are all called to be about our Father’s business, but those who have been called to lead us in our calling need to be encouraged as well.

And remember that even the times that try our souls are not forever, but for a season.

I wrote this a couple of years ago, but I felt as if God was calling me to post it again.

This and That

2009-08-22T07:45:00.000-07:00

I haven't been updating my blog as much in the past few weeks. I was gearing up for the school year. I just love new school supplies! Pencils, pens, paper, oh my! In the process of starting school two weeks ago I ran into illness with three of my wonderful kids. The three girls all came down with something different. The youngest two have recovered but the oldest was just diagnosed with mono and walking pneumonia on this past Tuesday.

So, now we are trying to get her healed up. It isn't much fun being stuck in your room and in bed most of the day. She is an avid reader and it is almost impossible to keep her in books. I am heading off to the used bookstore later today to try to get her a few more books. Sadly, she will probably finish them off in a few days.

We have some awesome curriculum this year and I am excited to really get into it. We took a break for a few days to get the others all healed up and rested. I will have the oldest do school but at a pace that won't wear her out.

Well, I guess I had better get back to the daily chores and other things that make up what is my life.

The Harvest or the Barn?

2009-08-11T09:02:00.000-07:00

I have always been amazed at the pretty and modern factor of so many of our churches today. Church buildings that are beautifully decorated, high glitz, super comfortable all under the guise of making people comfortable and welcome as well as giving to God our best. Then there is the muli-media capabilities that present the up to dateness of our congregation and the oohh and ahh factor. These allow us to spot light the talent of the people in the church and again we feel to give God our best.

What are we really saying though and what are we really doing? If we feel we need to do all this who are we trying to reach?

We often criticize people in our faith for being superficial and not being real. We claim people are unwilling so share the difficulties of their lives and that we try to pretend everything is just wonderful when we all face valleys in our lives. But aren't we do the same with pretty well furnished churches that keep most churches struggling financially and keep its members and leadership stressed as to how the bills are going to be paid?

Let's get real on all levels. God isn't going to look at how nice our church buildings are or how wonderfully decorated and welcoming they are. He is going to look at how many people we brought through the doors and brought into His kingdom. He is going to look at how we dealt with orphans and widows. He is going to look at how we treated our neighbor and how we reflected His son. His son that was a carpenter who taught generally outside as he walked along or sat in a group of people. The funny thing is that no matter the effort and money we put into an actual church building it is never going to look as good as what God can do, so who are we kidding?

As Christians we have confused needs and wants in our church experience as well. We need video screens, bright and cheery classrooms for kids, matching furniture and welcoming decor. Why? Did Christ have any of these things? Did the churches in Acts have any of these things? Do children starving without clean water in all parts of the world care about these things? Does our neighbor that doesn't know Christ really need these things? Do we as members in our churches need the time and financial distraction of these things when we have enough things in our lives distracting us from the Great Commission?

Now, before you start saying well we need churches. You are right to a point. Having a church building is wonderful to meet in, to fellowship in, to have a place to bring the searching and lost to, and to be a launching pad for evangelism. But ask those that are persecuted in other parts of the world if the "building" is necessary. Even with that example, I do think the physical building is a wonderful thing. It is our thought about what we have to have in it and around it that we have to really consider. We also have to consider the timing of bringing those kinds of things into a reality in our churches. If we have to borrow for them or the cost takes away from what we can really be doing for the Kingdom of God we need to think about whether they are needs or wants at the given time. Also if we need to fill a church with people then we need to realize as that is accomplished we will be able to accomplish more of our other goals and actually get others involved and have them feel a part of what we are trying to create.

I am sure others will say if we are going to do if for God, it should be done really well. No argument here, but what are we doing for God? Are we using the building to show off His glory or are we using our actions and lives to do that. Are we putting our time and efforts into things that moth and fire can corrupt or are we storing treasures in heaven? I think we should do things really well when it comes to doing them for God, but we need to consider that we shouldn't do them at the expense of what He commands us to do and what He expects of us. We shouldn't put the material objects before the mandates or the furnishings in front of the flock.

There are many churches struggling in these economic times and many churches that will not make it in these times. Many of these are due to heavy debt burdens the churches have accumulated to be all they could be in a material sense under the guise of doing if for God. How is building bigger barns going to help us if we are focusing on them and not the field that is white unto harvest. If we aren't harvesting, who is going to fill the barns/churches and how can we afford the upkeep? From God's perspective which is of more value, the harvest or the barn?

Passionate Purpose v.s. The Will of God

2009-08-09T13:19:00.000-07:00

There have been times in my life where an idea would come to mind that I would feel very passionate about. I just knew that if I could get it to come together God would be glorified in many ways. I mean after all surely the idea had to come from Him. They are good ideas, ideas that serve others, ideas that would surely bring others to know Him or know Him better, ideas that I thought God would surely be on board for.

I felt passion for them. Not just I wish I could or wouldn't it be nice if... No these were ideas that I had plans for that I felt surely would get a Hallejuah, she got the message.

We all often have times when we have good intentions about things we are passionate about. And sometimes that is exactly where God is leading us but at times it is more like us leading us. How often did I actually stop and ask God, is this what you want me to do?

I think often we validate what we want to do with the fact that it can fit in the mandates of God to be light in a world of darkness, to tell others about Him, and to have Him be the focus of our plans. Kind of like the looks like a duck, walks like a duck, sounds like a duck, so it must be a duck kind of logic. But God works in different ways than we do. We can't apply man's logic to the workings of God. He is above that.

I am often reminded of King David and his son Solomon. King David wanted to build the temple, He made preparations for it and had plans for it, but he wasn't the one God chose to do it. The task fell to his son Solomon. David had a passion but it wasn't to be God's plan.

I think at times I have become so involved in passions and plans of my making that I often don't see what God is truly calling me to do or maybe what God is calling me to do seems to pale in comparrison in my mind to what I have come up with. Surely God called me to something grander than that or why would I feel so passionate about this if God wasn't teh author of it?

God is in the big and miraculous but He is also in the small and simple. He works in the everyday. He doesn't need me to fulfill His plans but allows me to be involved. God is in a manger in a small town, God is in the lives of simple fishermen, God is in the compassion for two sisters who lost their brother, God is in presence of children who people chastise, God is in the calming of fears of His friends, God is in the washing of disciples feet. God is in it all!

My passion for Him and His call needs to be in His purpose, not one of my own design. He doesn't need to get on board with my ideas, I need to get on track with His.

Something We Can All Relate To...

2009-08-06T10:46:00.000-07:00

The Mourning Booth

This is a great video. I think we can all relate to this skit by the Skit Guys. I think we have all been there or have been with those who are there or have been there. I think sometimes we feel we have to do something for those that are in "the valley" but in reality sometimes just being there is what they need.

Even when we are in the valley it is hard to hear things will get better or you shall overcome this. Sometimes just having someone hug us or hold our hand is what we need. When you are in the dark place known as the valley very bright light can sometimes hurt our eyes or make us cringe. The shiny and happy people of our lives don't really offer us the comfort we need.

I think we can all relate to this and I hope we can learn something from it.

You can check out more things from the Skit Guys on www.tangle.com

At What Cost?

2009-08-02T13:32:00.000-07:00

Keeping in line with my previous blog, I wanted to share some of the things I have been wrestling with for the past few months.

What does it mean to be a Christian parent?

Does it mean we make sure our kids do church stuff?
Does it mean we thank God for our kids?
Does it mean we try to make sure they get some Bible learning along the way?
Does it mean we feel as if we ride the fence between two different worlds?
Does it mean we assume our kids would never do what those "other kids" do?

Or

Does it mean we embrace the vision for moms and dads and families as a whole that God intended?
Does it mean we realize we are in the world but should not be of the world?
Does it mean our family's goals and focus should be on what Christ has called us to be and not what our neighbors are doing?
Does it mean that we are willing to sacrifice the comforts of this world for eternal life and eternal things that moth and fire can not corrupt?
Does it mean that making the difficult choices that aren't always popular are understood to have eternal consequences instead of short term discomfort?

What does it mean to have the awesome responsibility to raise up children in the knowledge of God and help lead them to a relationship with Jesus Christ?

Is it part of our To Do list that we just check off once they wade through the water of a baptism pool?

Do we realize that the call of a Christian parent is a call to sacrifice not just our time and money but ourselves?

Are we willing to go against the tide that accepts what the world has to offer in exchange for what God is offering us?

Today more than ever Christian families are under attack. We can blame it on all kinds of things and not that they don't have a part in it but the reality we as Christian parents are to blame if we don't truly understand what God is calling us to as parents.

Christian parenting should be more than providing stuff, activities, and basics for a child. Christian parenting should be more than offering no worse than what the world sets for a standard. Christian parenting shouldn't look like worldly parenting. But sadly for most of us it does. The real difference in Christian parenting these days in most cases is that many of us make sure our kids are in church on Sundays and sometimes we talk about religious stuff but other than that there isn't a real difference.

Here is a challenge that I think brings it home. For the next two weeks keep your current schedule. Don't change anything. Write down what you and your kids did for every hour of the day. Then at the end of each day go back and figure out how much time was spent honoring and glorifying God or even just strengthening your and your kids relationship with Him. How often did you or your family pray? How often did you talk about things that God has shown you? How often did you and your kids read a Bible or do a devotion or just talk about how something in your life was affected by God's promises or calling? Calculate how much real family time you spent. Calculate how much time you spent with God? Calculate how much time you and your kids spent in the world as the world? Was their a real difference in how you or your kids did things compared to others?

I think we have to be real here. I think it is time we quit playing Christian dress up on Sundays and become who we were called to be - followers of Christ that are willing to follow no matter what the cost. We are called as Christian parents to parent according to God's standards and not what others may say is right. We aren't called to something easy but we are called to something that is wonderful. We aren't called to build bigger barns by working insane hours to make sure we have a big home, a three car garage, every video game platform, all kinds of extra-curricular activities for our kids and countless other things we work toward and plan for. We are called to bring up our kids in the knowledge and admonition of the Lord. We are called to show our children the love of God and the sacrifice of His son. We are called to make a difference and be the difference. We are called to be on our knees and in the trenches fighting for our kids and our families.

What are we willing to sacrifice for our families and our children? Are we willing to take back our families no matter what the cost? Or are we content to keep plugging along in our comfortable lives hoping that our kids will catch all they need from our short visits to church and the values we think we are passing on?

If as Christian parents we take our job seriously, we are going to have to sacrifice. Sacrifice our time, sacrifice our financial gain, sacrifice our needs, and so much more. In Matthew 16:26, Jesus asks the question, "For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul?" I think the question that we need to answer answer as well is, what will it profit us as parents if we gain the world and sacrifice our children in the process?

Are We Comfortable or Comforted?

2009-07-28T06:35:00.000-07:00

I have not posted in a while because I have been wrestling over a lot of things and could never seem to get them in word form correctly. I think there are times when we wrestle with things and we have to just get to a point where we understand them more before we can share with others.

I think there are times when God brings us to a point of discovery that doesn't seem as exhilarating as I am sure the discovery of land from the ships of Columbus must have been. It is the kind of discovery where you feel worn out and like you have been wrung out. It is the kind of journey where there aren't fun and tacky t-shirts and beautiful post cards with the words "Wish You Were Here!". It is the kind of journey where you feel blistered, hungry, and somewhat not yourself. Like you just finished crossing a desert and want nothing more than a cool drink of water and a bed to sleep in.

I have been through a time of accepting the whole call of being a mother as something more than what the world would say it is. I have been through God convicting me of what a child's education should be. I have been through a time of God showing me how important my relationship is to him in regards to my relationship with others. I have wrestled with how to measure my successes or how I view success by how God would measure it and not how the world would measure it.I have also been wrestling with accepting that the call of a daughter, or son for that matter, of the Heavenly Father is not one that will always make you feel comfortable but one in which He will always be there to comfort you.

I will post more on these discoveries this week, but the question for now is:
Do the goals we have and the lives we lead reflect a desire to become what God has truly called us to be or do they reflect one of comfort and worldly success? This isn't always an easy question to answer. Often we find we have truly missed the mark for God. I know that I have in many ways. Are we comfortable or comforted?

The Prodigal Point

2009-07-04T18:28:00.001-07:00

Comments and Ideas Please

2009-07-04T16:35:00.000-07:00

I wrote the story below about 5 years ago. I know He gave me the story to write because it only took me about an hour to write and it just flowed from my fingers as I typed. It was during a time when I was struggling with my heart knowing that God heard my prayers but mind struggling with it because of all the things going on in my life. It seemed as if the doors to heaven were closed when I cried out. I know God heard me and I can see that with distance from then. It was at this time that I sat down one afternoon and an hour later I had written this story. I know God was showing me in His gentle way that He is always listening, and will show us in His way in His time.

I am considering sending it to some publishers to see if it is publishable. I sent it shortly after I finished it five years ago to one publisher and received a rejection letter. I decided it wasn't in God's timing, but lately have felt him pushing me to try again. I would love comments and constructive criticism on it. I know there are typos and mistakes, so please forgive them. If you want to let me know where they are, please do so. Sometimes when you are writing something you tend to make the corrections in your mind and they become more difficult to see when they are on paper. For those that have read it before, please forgive the redundancy.

Thank you and I hope you enjoy...

Emily's Gift

Emily woke up early with a smile on her face. It was Valentines Day! She was very excited. Emily loved Valentine’s Day! It was filled with pink and red, her two favorite colors and they were going to have a party at school. She got dressed in the new dress her mom had bought her. Emily ran downstairs to eat breakfast. Her dad was already at the table.
“Good morning honey,” he said. “Why are you so excited?”

“It’s Valentine’s Day!” Emily almost shouted.

“Yes, it is”, he said with a smile, “How is my little sweetheart?”

“Fine” Emily said with a huge smile.

“How do pancakes sound?” her mom said coming over to give Emily a hug.

“Can you put a chocolate chip smiley face on them?” Emily asked.

“Smiley Valentine pancakes coming up” her mom replied.

After she had finished eating her mom said, “Can you take some muffins to Mrs. Esther for me?”

“Yes!” said Emily excited.

Mrs. Esther was their neighbor. She was an elderly lady that lived next door to them. Emily liked to visit Mrs. Esther. You always had to be on your best behavior at Mrs. Esther’s house and you had to remember your manners, but Mrs. Esther was very kind and she told wonderful stories about when she was a little girl.

Emily’s mother got the muffins ready and sent Emily next door. She walked up the sidewalk to Mrs. Esther’s front porch. During the spring and summer, Mrs. Esther had a beautiful yard. Mrs. Esther spent much of her time working in the flowerbeds and Emily knew you did not go in Mrs. Esther’s flowerbeds. That was one rule she had learned when she was younger. Emily skipped up the porch steps and knocked on the door. She waited patiently and she heard Mrs. Esther shuffle across the wooden floor to the door. Mrs. Esther opened the wooden door and looked at Emily through the screen door.

“Good morning Emily. You look very pretty this morning.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Esther” Emily replied. “Here are some muffins mom made”.

Mrs. Esther opened the screen door and taking the basket from Emily said, “Come inside. It is cold outside sweetie.” Emily stepped into the house and felt the warmth. Mrs. Esther went to put the muffins in the kitchen. The familiar aroma of Mrs. Esther’s house made her smile. It always smelled like dried flowers, apples and cinnamon. Emily loved the way Mrs. Esther’s house smelled. Mrs. Esther called out from the kitchen, “I know you have to get to school, but I wanted to give you something.”

When she came back into the room, she was carrying a little pink bag with a red ribbon. “I got you something for Valentine’s Day”, she said with a smile. Emily’s eyes sparkled. She had never received a present from Mrs. Esther just for her. At Christmas time, Mrs. Esther always baked cookies and a pie for her family. Mrs. Esther sat down beside her, “I hope you like it."

Emily looked in the bag and inside was a small blue velvet box. She picked up the box and opened it. Inside was a charm bracelet with one small charm. The charm was a silver heart with red jewel inside it. Emily smiled and hugged Mrs. Esther. Emily couldn’t believe Mrs. Esther had remembered. Last fall, Emily had told Mrs. Esther how she would love to have a charm bracelet. She told Mrs. Esther how her mom had said she would have to wait and how disappointed she had been. Emily had thought she would get one for Christmas but somehow Santa had overlooked it. Emily had kept a hope that she would get one for her birthday when she turned nine in May. Holding up the sparking charm bracelet, she felt so happy. “Thank you Mrs. Esther! Thank you so much!”

“I thought it might go with your new dress. Now hurry on back to your house so you can get to school on time.”

Emily gave Mrs. Esther one more hug and skipped out of the house, down the porch and onto the sidewalk. As she skipped down the sidewalk passed the big oak tree in Mrs. Esther’s front yard, she saw the wooden and iron bench under the tree. She and Mrs. Esther had shared a lot of time on this bench. Mrs. Esther would tell Emily stories, show her how to crochet, talk about life, and listen to Emily when her parents were busy or Emily just needed someone to talk to. Emily had heard other people say Mrs. Esther was not overly friendly or she was kind of stand offish, whatever that meant, but Emily didn’t care, she had always been nice to her. When Emily had asked her mom about it, her mom had said that Mrs. Esther had just seemed really sad since her husband Mr. Charles had died. Emily did not remember much about Mr. Charles. He had died when she was two. Emily always felt a little sad that Mrs. Esther lived all by herself. She couldn’t imagine how awful it would be if she was all alone.

Emily looked at the charm bracelet and the little heart charm. She wished she had something to give Mrs. Esther.

Emily had a wonderful time at school and she had a whole box of Valentines to show her mom when she got home. Emily ran into the house almost out of breath. “Look mom at all the valentines I got.”
“I see, they are very pretty Emily.” “How was your class party?”
“It was a lot of fun and everyone loved the heart shaped peanut butter and jelly sandwiches you made.”

Her mom smiled, she remember how much she had enjoyed the heart shaped peanut butter and jelly sandwich her mom had made her when she was little, so she had cut out little heart shaped sandwiches for Emily’s class.

“Mom,” Emily said, bringing her mom’s mind back to Emily and the kitchen they were sitting in, “I’m going upstairs to put away my things and change my clothes. Then can I play for a while? I don’t have any homework tonight.”
“Yes, Emily, you can, “ “Don’t forget to bring down you valentine for Daddy.”
“Thanks mom, I won’t forget and make sure you let me know before he gets home.”

Emily went to her room. She did all the things she was supposed to do and then sat down on her bed. She had a fun day but somewhere in the back of her mind she couldn’t stop thinking about Mrs. Esther. She looked at the charm bracelet. If only she could think of something wonderful to get Mrs. Esther, then maybe she wouldn’t be sad anymore. Emily’s mom found her sitting on her bed staring out the window. “Why so serious, Emmie? I thought you had a good day.”
“I did momma, I was just thinking about Mrs. Esther.”

“I was trying to think of something nice to give her since she gave me this wonderful charm bracelet. I feel bad I don’t have anything to give her.”

“I am sure Mrs. Esther was not expecting you to give her something in return,” her mom said, “After all that isn’t why you should give someone a gift.”

“I know, it’s just that Mrs. Esther, doesn’t really have anyone to give her a gift.”

“That’s true, but you know sometimes just spending time with some one is a gift to them.” “You enjoy spending time with Mrs. Esther and I am sure she enjoys spending time with you.”

“I know mom, but it isn’t quite the same thing.” “I would really like to see Mrs. Esther smile so that her face can’t hold back the joy.”

Emily’s mom smiled. Emily was such a caring little girl and she was glad to see her concern for Mrs. Esther.

“Mom, why doesn’t Mrs. Esther go to church? She would probably have a lot of friends then.”

“You are probably right about her having a lot of friends, but she doesn’t feel like going to church.”

“Why, is she sick?” Emily asked. Emily loved going to church and she couldn’t image anyone not feeling like going unless you were sick.

“It is kind of complicated", her mom said with a deep breath.

Her mom sat down. “Mrs. Esther used to go to our church when you were a baby. She also used to have a lot of friends, and I think she enjoyed going to church as well.” Emily’s mom said with a smile. “But after Mr. Charles died, Mrs. Esther stopped coming. I tried to get her to come back but she said she felt as if God had forgotten her when Mr. Charles died. She had prayed and prayed for him to get well and stay with her and in the end it did not seem to matter. Mrs. Esther was really sad about it and she just felt God didn’t answer her prayers because He did not love her or remember her.”

“But mommy, God loves all of us and he doesn’t forget who we are.”

“Yes, you’re right Emily, but sometimes we forget that and it is hard to remember when we go through difficult times.”

“You know that dogwood tree right outside Mrs. Esther’s living room window by the front porch?”

“Yes,” Emily said slowly.

“It has never bloomed in the spring since Mr. Charles died.”

“Why doesn’t it bloom? The tree is still alive.”

“You are right and I am not sure why it stopped blooming. Trees can be like people I guess and still be living but not blooming and missing joy and beauty in life. It is almost as if the tree knows how Mrs. Esther feels.”

“Why doesn’t she plant a new dogwood tree?”

“It wouldn’t be the same, sweetie. Mr. Charles planted that tree for their anniversary one year. It is a special tree to Mrs. Esther.”

Emily’s mom looked at her watch. It was almost time for dinner and for Emily’s daddy to be home. “Well sweetie, we had better get daddy’s Valentine surprise ready.”
“Ok mom, just give me a few minutes and I’ll bring my stuff and help you get the table ready.”

Emily looked out her window at Mrs. Esther’s house next door. She could see the dogwood tree standing in the cold and looking lifeless. She knew it would be green again during the summer, but she wondered if it would bloom this year.

Emily got her daddy’s valentine and the surprise one she had made for her mom and went into the dining room. She gave her mom her surprise valentine. Her mom hugged her and gave her a kiss. Emily was happy. She enjoyed surprises and liked to surprise people. When her daddy came home they had a wonderful dinner and he gave Emily’s mom and her some flowers and a box of candy.

When it was time for bed her parents came in to tell her good night. Emily sat on the bed and said, “I know what I am going to give Mrs. Esther”

“What?” her mom asked.

“I am going to pray that God will have her dogwood tree bloom this spring.”

Emily’s parent looked at each other, “That is a wonderful idea,” her mom said.
That night Emily knelt beside her bed with her parents and prayed,

“Dear God,
Thank you for my mom and dad, and our house, and all the
wonderful things you have given me. Thank you for the beautiful day. Forgive me
for the wrong things I did. Help me to listen to mommy, daddy, and my teachers.
And God, if it is possible, I pray that Mrs. Esther’s dogwood tree will bloom
this spring. Please show her you love her and you still remember her. Thank you
and God, Happy Valentine’s Day. Love, Emily Amen.”

Emily’s mom and dad smiled. “That was very nice, Emmie,” her dad said with a hug. "I know God is glad you are concerned about Mrs. Esther. It is important for us to remember God loves us all especially when we have to remember for those who feel forgotten." Emily got into bed and went to sleep.

Every night for the rest of winter and sometimes at dinnertime too, Emily prayed for Mrs. Esther and her dogwood tree. She just knew Mrs. Esther would finally smile from the inside if the tree would bloom.

Finally the cold days of winter ended and it started to warm up again. It was only a week away from Easter. Everything seemed to be in bloom. The daffodils and tulips were very pretty in Mrs. Esther’s yard. Emily had help Mrs. Esther plant them so she felt a certain pride in how pretty they were. Emily went to visit Mrs. Esther. They sat on the bench and admired the flowers and the warm sun. “It’s almost Easter, Mrs. Esther.” Emily said excitedly.

“Yes, it is.” Mrs. Esther said somewhat quietly. She was looking at the dogwood tree with a longing in her eyes.

Emily felt sad. It still had not bloomed. She was certain God could do it, maybe He needed a little more time. “Mrs. Esther, I was wondering if you would come to church with us next week on Easter Sunday? I know you don’t usually go, but I thought you could come and then have lunch with us. I asked mom and she said it was fine.”

Mrs. Esther looked at Emily with a soft half smile, “Thank you for asking, my dear, but I am not sure I will feel up to dinner and church. Could I rest in the morning and come for dinner?”
Emily looked at Mrs. Esther and said, “Sure, I will miss you at church, but having you come to lunch will be wonderful.”

Saturday evening before Easter, Emily wrote a card to Mrs. Esther. She felt like she had failed in her prayer attempts and was not sure if she should tell Mrs. Esther that she hadn’t prayed hard enough for her to get her special gift. She decided she would tell Mrs. Esther so at least she would know Emily had not forgotten her. Emily woke up very early Easter Sunday and put on her new pink dress with flowers. She hurried into the kitchen and quietly crept out the door. Silently she went next door with the basket of muffins and candy she and her mom had made for Mrs. Esther. Emily put her card on top and left the basket by the door where Mrs. Esther would find it when she went to get the newspaper. Emily hurried back to her house and finished getting ready for church. As they left for church, Emily looked back but knew she wouldn’t see Mrs. Esther till lunch time.

As soon as Emily’s family had left, Mrs. Esther went out to get the newspaper. She saw the basket and card. She bent down and picked the basket up and brought it back inside. She saw Emily’s writing on the envelope. She smiled She opened the hand made card. On the outside Emily had drawn a cross with red and pink tulips all around it. She had written Happy Easter Mrs. Esther. When she opened it and began reading she sat down and all of the sudden she felt the warmth and wetness of tears spilling down her face. She could scarcely belief what she was reading. Emily had written her a little note that said.

Mrs. Esther,
I had hoped this would be a very special Easter and spring
for you. I have prayed during the winter for your dogwood tree to bloom. I
thought that maybe if it bloomed you would not think God had not forgotten you.
I am not sure why it has not bloomed. I know God must have a plan, but I wanted
you to know I have not forgotten you, and if an eight almost nine year old who
forgets her reading book from time to time can remember you, I am sure God
remembers you and loves you to. I am sorry I did not pray hard enough or long
enough for the tree to bloom. Maybe next year.
Love,
Emily

Mrs. Esther felt the tears run down her face and she got up and walked to the window. She looked out at the tree and then wiped her eyes. She saw something that made her breath catch. On one lone branch there was a flower - a tiny white dogwood flower. She couldn’t believe it. She hurried outside despite the fact she was still in her nightgown. She went and looked closer. Yes, it was a dogwood flower. She had a hard time believing it. She closed her eyes and slowly opened them. It was real. God had not forgotten her. She could feel years of sadness and loneliness flowing away in the tears that had started streaming down her face. She hurried inside and looked at the clock. She had forty-five minutes, could she make it?

Emily was leaving Sunday school to go into the Worship service with her parents. She saw an older lady in a beautiful pink dress with a white hat with a pink flower on it standing at the top of the stairs. She wondered how Mrs. Esther would have looked in a dress like. She thought Mrs. Esther would like it since Mrs. Esther liked hats. As she reached the top of the steps the lady turned and looked at her. It was Mrs. Esther and Emily could see her smiling with a joy her face could not hold back. Emily ran to her and hugged her.

“You came!”
“Yes, Emily I did. I had to make sure you knew God answers prayer and you weren’t the only one that remembered me.”
“What do you mean?” Emily asked.
“The tree, it has one white flower on it. It might not be a lot, but it was enough and I am sure with both of us praying this winter, it will be full next spring.”

Emily smiled and took Mrs. Esther’s hand. Emily’s mom and dad smiled and they walked behind their neighbor and their daughter thanking God for answered prayers.

Online Again

2009-06-26T15:34:00.001-07:00

I am finally back online after waiting for 6 days to have our Internet connection restored. We changed our telephone service to another carrier and chaos ensued with our Internet service. Needless to say, it has been a long and frustrating six days. It made me aware of how much I use the Internet to find recipes, look up phone numbers, stay in touch with friends, and other things. I am glad I am back to being connected.

I was very blessed in that the service wasn't disconnected before I was able to upload the kids' photos to Walgreen's for printing that we took for Father's Day presents. We are trying to watch our money so the kids and I decided to update daddy's photos at work.

Here are some of them:

I was glad we at least were able to give daddy his gift. He was really glad to have new pictures for work.

I am glad I am back online and can catch up with my email and blog friends.

Spiritual Tantrums

2009-06-18T09:17:00.000-07:00

I think we have all been a spectator or been in the middle of dealing with a tantrum from a small child out in public. It usually happens at a store and you will hear the crying and whining, "Why, Why, Why?", or the "I want it!", or the lovely, "no, no, no!" all these are followed by screaming and/or the child throwing themselves on the floor and refusing to do what the parent is telling them to do. I always hate witnessing these scenes. They aren't pleasant for anyone, particularly the parent having to deal with it.

As I picture the whole scene in my mind a thought occurred to me. How often does God see us throw spiritual tantrums? Tantrums where we question God about the state of things in our lives or whine and cry about why things are the way they are. I know I have these meltdowns from time to time. I am sure it is as unpleasant for God as the ones parents deal with here on earth.

It is one thing to have a two year old that doesn't quite understand the program have a meltdown, but what about a 39 year old who should understand that is just not behavior becoming of a child of God? Who has the bigger issues the toddler or the 39 year old?

Why do I feel that if I have a spiritual tantrum that God is going to be more willing to answer my cries or give me what I want? Why do I think that a meltdown is more likely to bring my heavenly Father around to my way of thinking, than for me to look to Him for wisdom and guidance in a graceful and patient manner?

How do I reflect God when I seem to be a sniveling, whiney, and spoiled child who asks for more and more? Why isn't the gift of salvation and a God of love and acceptance enough?

I think it has to do with acceptance. Acceptance on my part to know that I don't have to have what the world says I need to have. I don't have to have everything perfect in order to be alright. It is the acceptance that through the trials I become closer to God and become more understanding of my place as His child. It is in understanding that if my life was everything I thought it should be, it wouldn't be everything God can make it or make me to be.

I use to run for the furthest part of the store when I would hear a child's tantrum begin. It is so uncomfortable and I know if I was the parent the least people that watch my distress the better. Now, I move away but think about how I am acting as a child of God. Would my heavenly father be proud of the way I am acting and look forward to going out with me, or would He tense up at the thought of taking His undisciplined child out for the day?

I am not sure I will ever totally get a handle on my spiritual meltdowns, but I do think I am slowly gaining ground in dealing with them. I am sure God thinks it is about time for a 39 year old to stop kicking and screaming when He is working me back into His will.

American Pie - A Second Helping

2009-06-15T18:27:00.000-07:00

It is amazing that as a nation we have been through so much yet have learned so little or maybe we have forgotten too much. In our race to be politically correct, not trample on everyone’s rights, and get our share of the American Pie we have forgotten from whence we came.

Life in early America and even America up to about 70 or so years ago, was about hard but honest work, helping others when needed without looking for the reward, only buying what you could afford, and a strong devotion to this county with a desire to see its past principles carried on and a pride in our country that was not haughty or self absorbed. When I watch the news or read about what has happened in the news, I am saddened in many ways. There are the numerous stories about how people treat others with hate, fear, murder, theft, and so on, but as horrible as all these things are, just as bad is the sickly pallor of our nation and the rejection of it or lack of compassion for it by her own people.

We seem not to care that as we go about our lives based on the “pursuit of happiness” we forget it is the “pursuit of happiness” we are guaranteed not “happiness” itself. We have the ability to “pursue” happiness because of the sacrifices of others and because of the framework on which this country was built.

When we, as people in a nation, become more concerned with our piece of the pie instead of the whole pie, we begin to lose. We focus on “Is your piece bigger than mine?”, “Where is my piece?” “What did he or she do it get that piece of pie?”, “Are there nuts in my piece of pie?”, “Why does my neighbor have more crust or less crust?” or whatever we think we just have to have. Instead of seeing the whole pie is precariously perched on the edge of the table and is close to falling, we are glancing over our piece and looking at everyone else’s piece to compare them. Now, that is not to say that we shouldn’t be concerned about our piece but only in relation to making sure we take care of our piece and not let it fall on the floor, or be left for others to ravage through. We also have to realize that once we have a piece we are responsible and accountable for it and we can not assume the pie or others will take care of it.

We are given our rights to pursue happiness but not at the cost of watching the whole nation crumble under our greed in our desire for the best piece of pie expecting it to cost us as little as possible with the least amount of work. When I look at the state of our nation, I am reminded of the analogy of the difference between involvement and commitment. "The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' -the pig was 'committed'." Are we involved with making our America stronger or are we committed? Are we involved in keeping the pie from the edge by carrying a sign, “watch for falling pie”, or are we going to get in there and push back until it is away from the edge regardless of the size of our piece?

When will we realize that just getting a piece of pie, no matter how big or small that it is, is a blessing and one we need to be thankful for regardless of how much we have. We also need to realize that the pie we eat was made by others and if we don’t get in and get committed to making more pie based on the old fashioned recipe there will not be any “American Pie” for future generations.

Questions or Faith?

2009-06-12T11:15:00.000-07:00

I guess I must be in a pondering mood because besides pondering about all the stuff I normally ponder about, I have been pondering something else lately. I have been considering all questions we attempt to answer about God and His relationship with man. Questions that range from did God allow evil in the world, can God create evil, does man have free will, or does God choose those that are His children? There are so many more as well. There are different camps on every side of a question or issue and many of them can back up their positions with verses in the Bible. I have been wrestling with some of these issues as well and in the midst of the struggle a clear thought has occurred to me. Does it all really matter to my relationship with God? Do I need answers to these questions in order to have a strong faith in God, or isn't that what faith is in many ways believing in God without having to know the whole picture?

Throughout history men have fought each other through words, deeds, and even with weapons over the disputes in our "understanding" of God and his motivations, actions, and thoughts. I think in many ways our "questions" serve more to divide than unite. Why are we driven to figure God out? Is it something we need to do in order to mitigate the feeling that we are less than God, or it is a feeling that we have to understand in order to follow?

I will use the illustration of a parent and child. There are many times as parents we will tell a child something or give them a command and when we are questioned, we say, "because I said so." There may be a reason for why we don't explain our reasons or actions. There may not be time, the child may not have the maturity or ability to totally understand, and then there is the reason of we are in authority and that is all there is to it. How do we feel when a child questions us in these situations? Do we feel closer to the child or do we feel a little put off that we need to explain ourselves? After all we are the parent. Our child should just trust us and know that we have the experience and knowledge to know what is best.

Do I need to question my Heavenly Father on His reasons for things or do I just need to follow what He has told me. Jesus used many illustrations about sheep during his time here on earth and even compared himself to a good shepherd. Sheep follow their master. They don't have to know why the master does what he does, they just know that protection lies with the master. God did make us smarter than the average sheep and he did give us the ability to question things but does this really give us the permission to do so? Maybe our cognitive abilities were meant for other things.

Being human and not able to understand the mind of God, why do we attempt to answer the questions we raise? If we consider The Bible God's instruction book for us all, why do we have volumes and volumes of books in stores that attempt to "answer" our many questions? Why are there so many different answers?

I think in many ways man's questions serve mostly to divide us. I don't think that is the intention of the questions, but I have to wonder what is the intention? I don't think I need to understand why sin or evil exist. I know it does. I also know that because they do exist we are separated from God and because of them we have to have a way back to God. That way was made available through the death and resurrection of His son Jesus. Through my acceptance of Jesus as God's son and the acceptance of Him sacrificing himself for me I reestablish a relationship with God the Father.

If I accept God as sovereign and I put my faith and trust in Him? Haven't I already said I will follow Him and I don't need verification through the answering of all these question to arrive at that place. Do I need to truly know whether I chose God or whether He chose me? Does the answer to that relieve me of anything? No, I am required to go out and tell others and help bring them to a knowledge of the love of God and the grace He offers.

I think we get too hung up in our search for answers to questions that in reality don't change what God has told us in the Bible. Love the Lord your God and Love your neighbor as yourself. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life and no one comes to the Father except through him. If we were truly capable of understanding the mind or actions of God, wouldn't we be just like him and isn't the desire for that what muddied the water in the first place?

I know there are many that would say I have taken an overly simple position on issues that are complicated and require more thought. I say that while God is a complex God, the way He relates to people is simple. A baby in a manger, a woman at a well, the hunger of a multitude, the anguish over the death of a brother, a death on a cross are all easy to understand. We understand a mother's pain and joy, looking for love in all the wrong places, hunger, the pain felt at the death of a loved one, and the sacrifice of one that didn't deserve to die. These are the messages God leaves for us and how He reveals Himself. Messages of real human joy and suffering and He tell us how to deal with them.

I think to truly follow God is give up our desire to understand why, and to desire how we are to follow. That is where our study should begin and never end.

In the Book of John, Jesus left simple instructions to Peter, "Feed my sheep." Are we busy feeding sheep and helping others draw closer to Him, or are we feeding our own desire to know things that leave us with more questions?

While I sit and Ponder...

2009-06-11T10:57:00.000-07:00

Several months ago I wrote a blog titled The Stealth Christian. I followed it with another called the Great Omission. I was intrigued at the time with what were some major issues as I saw them in the church today. Not any one particular church but for the church as a whole, as the body of Christ.

I have been thinking about the impact these issues have on the Christian family. I am still considering these things and intend to post about them in the next week. I feel so compelled to draw attention to the need for families, especially Christian parents, to refocus their attention of putting God at the forefront of their families. There are so many families that just check out of church during recital season, summer, certain sports seasons, or just because they don't see a need to attend church on a regular basis. The question that intrigues me is which part fell apart first - the parent's relationship with God or their relationship with the church? Or is can it be a simultaneous thing. And then what needs to be done to revive these relationships?

The impact of a person's or parent's flat lined relationship with God is far reaching beyond them. It is as if the flat line of spiritual growth reverberates across their sphere of influence and impacts so many others. It may seem flat and appears to be a whimper across a broad spectrum of societal noise but it is a cry that the church can't ignore.

I know I don't have all the answers. I am not even sure I am close to presenting some ideas, but I do know it is something we as the body of Christ need to stand up and take notice of and work towards fixing.

Can You Hear the Music and Smell the Cake?

2009-06-01T17:58:00.000-07:00

The American Republic will endure until the day Congress discovers that it can bribe the public with the public's money. Alexis de Tocqueville

Americans are so enamored of equality that they would rather be equal in slavery than unequal in freedom. Alexis de Tocqueville

There is a saying that "Nero fiddled while Rome burned". Now before you get all excited and say that is an anachronism and the fiddle wasn't created until a thousand years later, I think you understand the meaning of it. The point is that while Rome was in distress and on fire, her leaders didn't seem to care about the population or city. Now onto the, "Let them eat cake", comment. This has often been attributed to Marie Antoinette though there is some historical dispute about this. Regardless of who said it, it is said that at the time of the quote, the French population was struggling under enormous financial distress and the French monarchy didn't seem to care and had a rather unsympathetic attitude toward the people's distress. Now I know it wasn't the cake we think of today, it was more of a pastry, whether a pastry or frosted cake, the meaning stays the same.

When I step back and look at American today, I can hear the music and smell the aroma of cake baking. Our government has lost touch with the populace, lost touch with our founding principals, and lost touch with reality in many ways. We have government officials who don't seem to think they should pay taxes, should be able to throw lavish parties at taxpayer expense, wear clothing that most of us couldn't afford, send their children to private schools that doesn't show a confidence in the public school system they claim to support, make millions off of book deals, and try to spin their way out of bad decisions or bad situations.

They are the Scarlett O'Haras of today. As Rhett Butler would say, they are "like the thief who isn't the least bit sorry he stole, but is terribly, terribly sorry he's going to jail." When they are caught they aren't concerned about what they did as much as getting caught. The thing is our politicians don't usually go to jail when they go outside the bounds of the law. Like Scarlett they usually find a way to bend the situation to their will and many times come out on top like the illustrious southern belle.

If those that forget history are doomed to repeat it then we are definitely there. We are those that Joseph de Maistre talks of when he wrote, "Every country has the government it deserves". If we can hear the fiddle and taste the cake it is because we have done nothing to stop it. We have waited for government to bail us out, lead us here or there, take away freedoms that were part of the founding of our country, and we have waited for the government to fix every perceived bad situation.

Where are the people who take a stand for what is right not just politically but morally? Where are the people who will stand and say this is enough? Where are the people who will say we don't have to buy houses we can't afford or live beyond our means because we are jealous, greedy, and spoiled people? Where are the people who believe in courage and freedom, not the people who would enslave us to the government so that the small group of politicians and individuals can ride the last waves of prosperity in this country on the efforts of the average person? Where is the motivation, inspiration, religious conviction, and willingness to sacrifice of our founding fathers and ancestors that said, enough is enough?

We could point the blame at those that govern right now, and I am not speaking of any one government official, but the reality is we put them there. Not just those currently in government but those over the past years that have had their part in the way things are today. Yes, we the people voted them there whether in ignorance, lack of understanding, apathy, or because we didn't check the facts and bought the image of what we thought we were getting and didn't see past the facade to the reality. If we are part of the problem, then we must be part of the solution. It is time to end the apathy and lack of accountability.

They say it isn't over until you hear the fat lady singing well, my friends, she hasn't hit her stride yet, but from the looks of it she is in the dressing room feasting on cake while the string section gets in tune. This is one concert I hope we have the courage to stop because once she sings, there won't be a need for an encore.

This Little Light

2009-05-31T16:40:00.001-07:00

When I was younger, we used to sing this song in Sunday school called “This Little Light of Mine”. I have abbreviated the number of lines we sang since they were repeated a few times but the lyrics went like this:

"This little light of mine,I'm gonna let it shine
Let it shine,Let it shine,Let it shine."

"Hide it under a bushel? No!I'm gonna let it shine
Let it shine,Let it shine,Let it shine."

I was chatting with a friend the other day. We were discussing why it is hard for people to share with others what God has done in their lives or what He is doing now. Why is it we are afraid to let our light shine and show the glory of God and all He can do in our lives? Is it because to explain how He is working we have to talk about our walk through the valley? Are we so proud that we can’t let others know we are struggling with things that most people struggle with? Are we afraid others will think less of us? Why are we so worried about “us”? Could it be our valleys are not only there so we can become better on the other side but also so, we can help others?

It is funny when we find a great new product like the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser we will call the world and say, “Guess what, there is the new product and it is terrific, it got XYZ off my walls, my shower doors, etc!” “ You just have to try it!” We will talk about the great restaurant we went to the other night. “You just have to try it” “The ribs and chicken were so terrific; I have never had such good barbecue!” We will take time to tell just about everyone we know and even people we run into if it works its way into the conversation.

However, how many of us call the world when God shows us something amazing or does something in our lives that only He can do? Do we call and say, “Guess what, it was three days till payday and we weren’t sure what we were going to eat because there wasn’t really enough food till then, but then a friend called and said they had extra food prepared and wanted to know if we wanted some. Isn’t God GOOD!” Then do we call everyone and say, “I haven’t had the money to buy clothes in over two years and I really needed some jeans, and guess what the sister in law of one of my dearest friends sent me three boxes of clothes she was going to get rid of and you’ll never guess, they all fit and there were seven pairs of jeans in there! PRAISE the Lord!” Yes, I know that is quite a run on, but you would expect the person to be excited, wouldn’t you? :)

Now to call and let everyone know how good God is and what He has done, we have to be willing to admit we are facing difficulties, but look at the testimony we now have. There are so many others out there that face so many of the same things we face that need to be encouraged. They need to know the God of the Bible is still in business today and still cares. If we hide it under a bushel, how can the love and light of God shine onto others? Let your testimonies be heard and let His light shine, we could all use it as we walk through the valleys or make it back up onto the mountaintop.

The Struggle

2009-05-25T15:58:00.001-07:00

“The bravest battle that ever was fought; Shall I tell you where and when? On the maps of the world you will find it not; It was fought by the mothers of men” Joaquin Miller

Lately I have been struggling to find the balance in being a Christian mother in today's world. There is the view of what constitutes "success" by a secular world view and then there is "success" by a more Christian world view. I say a more Christian world view because I think many times as Christians we try to add some spirituality to the secular world view and call it a successful Christian view. I have struggled with, at what point is this type of view successful? How does a Christian parent balance these views? How do we balance a world view that prides "success" in academics and extra curricular activities above the spiritual view with a view where God should be the focus and we should be raising our kids with a more eternal perspective? After much struggle, thought, and prayer it has come to me that maybe we aren't to find a balance. Maybe that is where in lies the problem. If we are trying to balance what God has called us to with what the world is calling us to, then aren't we putting God and the world at the same level?

As parents we often try to give our kids more than we had or give them opportunities to do more than we did. We compare our kids' successes with other kids and other families. As Christian parents we often fall into the same trap. In reality the gauge of whether we are successful as a parent is our child's relationship with God and with those around them. Are we raising children to have a more eternal perspective or one that focuses only on their life here? Are we raising children to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with God?

Where does God fit in our families' lives? Is he someone we mention on Sundays as we spend a few hours at a church or is He a part of our family and someone that we spend time with daily?

As a homeschooling parent I have spent the last year trying to come to terms with how finding this balance should play into my children's education. My husband and I are both strong on raising our children to do well academically and I think that this is a good thing. But I have also realized that all the academics in the world will not necessarily help my child develop a deep and abiding love for God. At the same time they need to be strong academically to be able to have opportunities where they can reach out to others and be able to be who God has called them to be. As a parent I shouldn't limit their potential. I think this is where most Christian parents struggle.

I have come to a place where I think God has shown me that my struggle in finding a balance is not one I can win. I have to put God first and in doing so make that the focus of how I raise my children. Success from God's perspective is raising my children to have a strong relationship with their heavenly Father and for my kids to love their neighbors as themselves and to discover what God's purposes for their lives are. The academics should enhance that or supplement it if you will. They need to do their best work in their academics as God's calls us all to do our best at what we do.

I guess in all I have found that for a Christian parent you can't achieve a real balance if God is the focus of your family's life. This is one time when we either are in accordance with His will or we are in accordance with the wishes of the world. This is not an easy concept to deal with all the time. Sometimes it is hard to look at things from an eternal perspective when we deal with life from and earthly perspective. It is hard to go against the grain of the world or to swim against the current of public opinion.

Look at the time your family spends each week. How much time is your family involved in activities that grow you and your children spiritually? There are 168 hours in a week. For most families only about 2 of these hours, usually on Sunday, are spent spiritually growing their kids and most the time this is done by others at church. It is no wonder that Christian families are struggling with many of the same issues non-Christian families struggle with. Not that we are immune to problems, but many times we don't work at strengthening our families through a strong relationship with God. We have to make a decision. Are we going to put God first or are we going to be "spiritual driftwood" that floats along in the river of secular public opinion - too afraid to make a stand or are we going to be like the mighty oak that holds firm to its roots and its foundation and has the river go around it?

As Christian parents we need to once again have a heart like Joshua and proclaim,
"...But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD."

I'll Pray For You...

2009-05-23T14:26:00.000-07:00

How many times have we heard this or even said these exact words? At face value they sound wonderful and something that is the foundation of something wonderful. I wonder how many times this is just a statement and not a catalyst for real action though. While I am not saying praying for someone is wrong I am beginning to think that often that isn’t enough action. Telling someone we will pray for them generally doesn’t require much of us. Just a few minutes during our day or evening, for a week, or weeks as long as we remember who it is and what we were praying about and then we are finished.

However, what if we took it a step further, what if we were actually committed to helping others beyond just “praying for them”. No, often we cannot solve other’s problems and many times we shouldn’t, but what if we could be a help in them lightening their burden(s). If you have friends going through troubled times, regardless of what they are, you can offer to keep their kids for a few hours once a week so they can have some time to get caught up or work on things they need to work on without interruptions. You could cook them a meal and bring it just because. Write them a note telling them you are thinking of them and letting them know you are continuing to pray for them.

Many times just doing small things for people, especially when they are going through a valley can mean so much and help give them a needed boost to keep going. Keep praying, but don’t let that be the total sum of what you do. It is in our actions that others see Christ in us and since for many of us, prayer is a private matter we don’t give others the opportunity to see Christ’s love for them through us. One more thought, don’t just do for others that you know. Sometimes the most wonderful kindness is one that comes from a stranger. If you hear of someone going through a rough time, do something to send a little light his or her way. You can do it anonymously or get to know them.

Sometimes we never know why we are where we are when we are there. When Esther questioned her position and her ability to change things, in Esther 4:14 Mordecai told her, “Yet who knows whether you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” Who knows what difference we can make to someone if we don’t go beyond just praying for them. We may never know but in the end, it does not matter if we know. What is important is when God shows us an opportunity that we don’t cross to the other side of the road assuming someone else will come along and help our neighbor. We may be there, on the same road, for such a time as this.

I have had many prayer requests cross my door this week and it made me remember this writing from a couple of years ago. I think it is the still small voice telling me to keep praying but find ways to show God's love in a more physical sense.

To Whom Much Has Been Given

2009-05-07T10:57:00.000-07:00

42They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. 43Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. 44All the believers were together and had everything in common. 45Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. 46Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, 47praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved. Acts 2:41-47

It would be amazing to look at the news today and not feel a sense of urgency about so many things. A sense of urgency as well as a sense of stress or anxiety. These are definitely difficult times for many. In the past few months the passage of Acts 2 has been brought to the forefront of my mind many times as I survey the current social and financial landscape that looms before me. I have been struck with the thoughts that though these are difficult times they are the times when God has given His people direction on how to behave, act, and be about His business.

We are not to be a people of fear and anxiety but a people that shows hope, joy, compassion, and the ability to share with others. We are to "... always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have."(1 Peter 3:15) How can we give a reason for our hope if we don't have hope or reflect that hope?

If there ever was a time for an Acts 2 church it is now. Not only for those in the church but for those that need to see Christ in action through us. These are the times when we have to give of ourselves and what God has blessed us with. I think often we look at our bank account and what we have and think, I barely have enough for me and my family, I am definitely not one of those to whom much has been given. The reality is every child of God has been given much through the grace of God through the death of Jesus. It is that "much" - our salvation - that we are required to share. To be a light to others and to draw them close to Him.

These are times when we should see that what we "have" is really God's and we are just stewards of it here. We are sharing with others what God has put us in charge of. We need to understand that no matter how small we think what we have is, it is God's and He can do great and mighty things with it. It maybe that the shelter we give someone, the food we share, or the money we give to others is just a step to them becoming children of God.

I have often wondered how we would respond to Jesus if He were among us today. A lowly carpenter that was barefoot and didn't really have a place to stay as he traveled unless it was at the kindness of others. Would we bother? The thing is Jesus won't physically come to your door and ask for a room, but if a family needed a place to stay or food to eat would we be there for them? If all believers felt that what they had was truly a blessing from God and truly belonged to God would we not give it back to Him? When I borrow something from a friend or neighbor I make an effort to make sure they get it back. Why don't I always feel that way about what God has let me borrow?

These are times that were created for the church. Times when we can shine in a world of darkness and help others to see Him through us. These are the times when the wheat stands out from the tares. Being about our Father's business often requires sacrifice but then why should that surprise us? Isn't it through sacrifice that we are even able to be His children? Giving to others is more about sharing what we have been given and acknowleging whom it truly belongs to, giving of ourselves is about acknowledging who we belong to.

The Love of Jesus can be summed up in one word - giving. He gave His life for us. The Acts 2 church could be summed up in one word - giving. They gave thanks, they gave praise, and they gave what they had to anyone in need. Shouldn't the church of today and our actions be summed up the same way?

Caterpillars or Butterflies

2009-05-03T13:02:00.000-07:00

The little girl was dressed in an old worn out dress. There were a few tears in it and a few places that look like they had been patched. She was barefoot and her feet were dusty. Despite the dirt and grime, she had a sweet face that seemed oblivious to the rest of her appearance. I watched her from a distance as she glanced in the direction she had come. The dirt road seemed no different than when she had come down it, but I suspected her appearance was different because of the road. She was covered in dust and there were smudges of red southern clay here and there along her face and hands. Her hair was disheveled and you could kind of tell at one time in the near past, braids had been where now was a tangled mass of unruly hair that strained against the tattered ribbons that bounced off her back into the air as she skipped along.

As I watched her I began to take pity on her. Her clothing was second hand and obviously more like third or fourth hand. I wanted to take her home and bathe her and right the tangled mess that seemed to be in mutiny all around her small head. I stood there and watched for a minute. She smiled at me and waved. Everything that was in me wanted to right the messy situation. Why didn’t someone care enough to keep her clean and proper I wanted to ask. She seemed like and adorable child, but who could tell amidst the current state of affairs. As I watched, I saw her stop, crouch down and look at something. I wanted to see what had caught her attention. I moved a little closer, but not wanting to frighten her I stood a little ways away. When I looked again, she was smiling and had something in her hand. I saw what I thought was a caterpillar. She was holding it up and watching it inch along on her hand. She seemed to notice I was watching and headed in my direction. I wasn’t sure what to do. I was afraid that as she skipped toward me the dust would soon be on me and I surely didn’t need to get messed up.

As she came closer she said, “Hi, want to see what I found?” Her voice was a surprise. I had suspected it would sound very country or backwoods but it sounded almost like a song. It was crisp and clear and almost beckoned me to her. I met her part of the way. If I thought she was grimy at a distance, it was nothing compared to being near her now. When she was almost near me, she held out her hand and said, “It’s a caterpillar. Isn’t it lovely?” I looked at the grimy little thing slinking along her arm now. “It is interesting I suppose”, I said in a measured voice wondering how this little girl could find a caterpillar lovely. She said, “one day it will be a butterfly, did you know that?” "Yes, I suppose", was my reply.

I looked at my watch and realized I was going to be late. I needed to get on my way. She looked at me and said, “People are like caterpillars.”
“How do you suppose that is?”, was my reply.
“Well, you are all dressed up and pretty and you look like a butterfly. I am sure I probably look more like this here caterpillar. Kind of dirty and short and definitely not able to fly.”

I started to smile, she look like she had been flying down the dusty road earlier as she skipped forth carefree. She then said, “do you think sometimes, people aren’t really butterflies, but pretend to be so that they can seem like they are above everything?” It must be hard for people to think they are like this caterpillar just inchin’ along and stuck on the ground or stuck to something and not able to see things from a different view.”

It took me back a moment. Her thoughts were so simple, but had so much meaning. I looked at this small girl that I realized must be older than I had thought when I first saw her, but she was still a child. I looked at her shabby appearance and as I thought about what she had said, I realized I wasn’t the butterfly, I was the caterpillar. I had only looked at this child from one view. I had thought I was above her and the dusty, drab, and worn appearance she seemed to project. In reality, before me stood the butterfly. A child that saw what things were from a different view and saw the promise in a little bug no bigger than a long piece of taffy. I began to feel as dirty as the child in front of me appeared to be. I realized the dirt on her was the kind that would wash off with a wade through a stream or with a bucket of water and a wash cloth. I also realized that the dirtiness I felt would only be removed with prayer and a change in heart. She looked at me and said, “where you goin’ all dressed up like that?”

“I was headed to church”,I said. It was at that moment I realized I had already heard a message from God.

"Well, you still goin’ to church?" she asked.

I looked at my watch and realized that if I hurried I could make it before the first song. Then I looked at the girl, the caterpillar, and the dirt road and I realized I had already found God and in the course of a few minutes with a child I had learned more than I had in years. I had learned that becoming a butterfly wasn’t based on age but on transforming from what we think we are or should be to becoming what our creator designed us to be. Even if I looked like a butterfly, I could still be earthbound and never able to see from a different view and from the other point, even if I looked like a dirty caterpillar I could be skipping towards the heavens lifted by the love and joy of God and seeing things from a very different point of view. Even in rags, someone can be beautiful when they can embrace the wonder and love of God. Likewise, even the most well dressed person with all the right social graces can be as lowly as the caterpillar without having true happiness and a real knowledge of God radiate from within. No matter what we appear to be on the outside, if we were truly transformed, nothing can truly hide that transformation once we surrendered to God and no matter what we appear to be on the outside, only God truly knows who are the butterflies and who are the caterpillars.

As I stood there, she must have gotten tired of waiting for an answer, she smiled and said, “well, I have to be goin’.”

I watched her skip away still cradling the caterpillar and with her hair still barely secured in the ribbons bouncing off her back. She headed back up the dirt road and along her feet she seemed to travel on clouds of dust. I stopped and decided I needed to take some time to pray. Pray for forgiveness for a haughty attitude and for missing the beauty in everything God had made, including a little girl who I judged based on appearance. I also thought I needed to thank God, thank Him for a lesson about real transformation and thank Him for the wisdom and beauty of angels that flitted about on clouds of dust.

This came to me as I was reflecting on some things. It is still a work in progress, but I felt compelled to post it anyway. Please forgive the rough draft nature of it.

The Cannoli Tree

2009-05-01T04:20:00.000-07:00

My two middle children are red heads. They are very different in personality but they do share one thing. They both have an issue with being able to come up with the right word for things. My son, the older of the two, has a bigger issue with this. There are times I am left trying to figure out what they are trying to say and then there are times when it is obvious what the word they are looking for to use is.

We have a magnolia tree in our backyard. One day Little Red, as our youngest red head is known as, came inside and was all excited. She had found a birds nest in the magnolia tree with eggs in it. She just wanted me to come see what she had found in the "cannoli tree" I asked her to show me which tree and sure enough it was the magnolia tree. Now, I would love for it to be a cannoli tree. Can you imagine being able to pick fresh canollis off a tree?

Now to Big Red, as my son is called. He is the master of confused words. One day we were discussing scientists and their contributions to science. Jake chimed in with, “Einstein was known for his work in Quarantined Physics”. I made sure to let him know it is "Quantum Physics" - not Quarantined Physics.

We have some friends that had told Jake about a sister putting her dance leotard on her brother. As Jake was retelling the story he said that the sister had put her "leonardo on her brother". After much laughter my oldest daughter and I explained it was a leotard. Leonardo was a famous artist or a Ninja Turtle if you want to explain it that way.

Little Red came in the other day after playing with her little sister the three year old. They had been playing in the dirt and were in dire need of a bath. As she stood there with Emma, she said, "This is my minion." I smiled and I knew this was one time when she had the right word and it was the word she intended.

Maybe there is hope for her...

Bible Bee!

2009-04-29T10:49:00.000-07:00

I am looking forward to May 1. It is the day we can download our study guide for the first National Bible Bee. The kids and I are getting excited about really getting into studying for this. We have been doing some overviews to get them ready for the study guide, but it will be nice to actually know what we need to get into. This should be a fun summer project for us.

If you haven't heard about the Bible Bee or would like more information on it, I would encourage you to check into it.

The Great Race Rewind

2009-04-29T09:13:00.001-07:00

I am always amazed that people today are in such a hurry. People drive at a breakneck pace to pass a car or get ahead of everyone, only to have to stop at a traffic light with all the other “slow” drivers they passed to get where they are going. People are frantically trying to be first and get through things so they can rush to the next thing. I make these statements not as just an observation, but one of the guilty of this ever pressing rush myself. I would like to think the reason I want to get through the grocery line fast, or through the bank line is I have some socially redeeming charitable work to get to that just wont happen unless I get there, but truth be told I am just jumping on the social gerbil wheel trying to keep from getting crushed or being ridiculed by others hurrying to get somewhere.

With the exception of emergency and law enforcement personnel, I am not sure most of us have life threatening emergencies on a daily basis. Once in awhile I know we all have to make a stop at a drug store for some health or beauty item we realized we were out of and just have to have for a social engagement, but really does this happen every day?

Is it self importance that makes us hurry or the feeling we will be left out if we aren’t there first or shortly after? Or is it that we all feel like we are losing so much time we are trying to get it back somewhere only to realize we have to go back to our house for the item we forgot when we rushed out the door? I rarely have an experience that I can say is good if I had to rush or hurry to it. I usually arrive all stressed out, my hair frizzes due to the heat I generated, and if my kids are involved, well that is another story.

I think we have to come to a point in our lives where we realize that we don’t need to hurry to everything. We also have to realize that we are in a hurry because we are often running late due to the fact we didn’t plan or that we started off late to begin. It isn't necessarily the fault of all those in front of us. Time has a way of catching up with us at times and it is later than we realize. What we need to do is slow down, plan our day, and realize that if we want our kids to be less impatient we need to set better examples. I can’t imagine what pace their lives will be at when they are adults if we all don’t start to slow down at least a little bit.

So today, take a deep breath, take off your track shoes, lessen your pressure on the gas pedal and realize you will get there. You have a better chance of making it there more safely and less frazzled if you slow down a little. Next time you head out, start out a little earlier and pace yourself. The Lord willing it will all still be here tomorrow.

Silence from Heaven

2009-04-18T04:25:00.000-07:00

I remember when I was a little girl and I would be asleep at night and a particularly bad thunderstorm would wake me up. The rolling thunder and crashing lightening were almost just too much to bear. I remember praying for God to please let it end, please make it quiet down, please keep me and my family safe. I know there were many a storm that from a little girl's perspective seemed to go on for so long. I use to wonder why God didn't make it stop if He knew I was scared? Why did it continue when I was praying so hard?

I still find myself praying during thunderstorms outside at night, but the real storms that get me unsettled now are the real storms in life. Times when it seems I am tossed about and meet thunder in my life. These are the times I pray to God to please let it end, please help me get through this, and please keep my family safe. As a child I use to wonder if God was hearing me. As an adult and further in my walk than I was as a child I know He does, but there seems to be the same silence from heaven. The storm rages on and yet God is silent or should I say appears to be silent.

When the thunderstorms raged when I was younger I learned that if you counted the seconds between the time you saw the lightening and heard the thunder you could estimate how far away the storm was. I used this many a night in between prayers to determine how much longer I had before the storm would pass. It was some what comforting to have a gage of how long it would be. The problem with life's storms is that there is no gage. You can't count the seconds between one event to another to gage how long you will be in the midst of the storm or when it will pass and when the silence from Heaven seems to be deafening, it can really be disconcerting.

In all the storms I dealt with as a child I knew there would eventually be an end it was just getting to that point that I longed for. I feel the same way as an adult. I also know that God is with me regardless of the silence I seem to be "hearing".
I am reminded of Isaiah 54:10:

"Though the mountains be shaken
and the hills be removed,
yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken
nor my covenant of peace be removed,"
says the LORD, who has compassion on you.

I know that though the storm rages around me that the maker of the thunderstorms I experienced as a child is the one that will stay with me now. I may not "hear" Him above the rumbling and flashing all about me, but I know that "though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil, for He is with me." My faith and understanding of His everlasting love for His children will comfort me.

I may not physically be the little girl that hid her head under the covers while the lightening flashed outside, but in God's eyes I am still His child and He will never leave or forsake me. I may not always hear Him, but I have to remember that maybe I shouldn't be trying to hear God from heaven, but from where I am - in the storm. I should try to hear Him from where He is, right beside me, as He walks through it with me.

The Jonah Factor

2009-04-16T11:36:00.000-07:00

I know we all have those times in our life when we are called to do something or called to something that we don't want to do. Times when we don't like what we have to go toward or where we will have to be if we go down a certain path. There are times when we are like Jonah. Knowing what God requires of us but yet trying to backpeddle and looking for our way in the opposite direction or just trying to stay put.

It is often hard to go forward in the direction God calls us to, but then staying where we are or heading down another path isn't usually pleasant as well. Jonah found that out the hard way. When we refuse to go in the way God wants us to go we will usually find ourselves swimming against God's current. That will get us nowhere. God has ways of bringing us around to seeing it His way. Often He brings people into our lives that nudge us, prod us, and sometimes just give us a swift kick in the seat. We can choose to consider these times a blessing or a trial. The interesting thing about God is He will take our trials and turn them into blessings if we will focus on Him.

We can go forward willing or woefully, but as His children we will never go alone.

Busy Busy Birthday Season

2009-04-08T06:45:00.000-07:00

It has been a busy and crazy few weeks here. My son turned eleven three weeks ago, my daughter turned thirteen last Thursday, and my Mother-in-law who is visiting us this week had her birthday last Sunday. By the time my birthday rolled around this past Tuesday, I was caked out and celebrated out. We had a quiet day here without all the normal birthday stuff.

We decided to take a trip to Rock City and Ruby Falls in Tennessee this past week. We had a nice time. The weather was great and the kids had a good time.

With the craziness of the past few weeks I feel like I have been very distracted and have not been on track with many things in my life. I am glad things will settle down now. I have felt as if there is distance in my walk with God and I know it is my issue not His. I know I feel this way when I have been praying about something to change or for me to see wisdom in why things are the way they are. Sometimes I think I focus too much on the situation and all that is going on around me to really hear what God is trying to tell me.

I pray that as my life quiets down, my mind will quiet as well and that I can listen for the still small voice of I AM.

The Rainbow in the Storm

2009-03-29T15:22:00.000-07:00

This past weekend has been a wonderful example of God in action and His promise to always be with His children as they go forward in obedience to Him. Our friends the Webbs are in the process of adopting a baby from Ethiopia. At the end of January they found out they would have to have $7400 by March 31st to complete their homestudy. They were a little in awe of the amount they needed to raise in two months, but knew that God would provide. They knew that God was capable, but they just weren't sure How they would see Him work.

Their biggest fund raiser was to be a yard sale at our church. The date was scheduled for March 28. By this past week they had raised $4,271. They needed almost another $3200. Well on Wednesday of this week the rain began and I don't mean just a little rain, by Friday we were in the beginning of a monsoon type of rain that wasn't expected to let up until Saturday night. To say we all were a little dismayed would be an understatement. How do you raise any money, let alone over $3,000 at a yard sale in the rain? They were able to move the sale inside the our church but not without a small obstacle of having to wait until 10PM Friday night to set it up. I had kidded Dana on Friday if she had borrowed Noah's ark to get the stuff to the church. I have never seen it rain so much for so long here in Georgia. After quite a few years of not enough rain, it was as if the sky had opened up and was trying to make up for it in three days.

We had all prayed for a beautiful sunny day but in the end, it wasn't to be. It wasn't God's plan. A storm with a lot of rain was God's plan. We were still concerned because even if the sale was inside, who in the world was going to go out into heavy rain to go to a yard sale? Well God must have been watching with a huge grin and a sigh of "O ye, of little faith". Well the rains came down, and the people came into the sale! Our small church's sanctuary was full of people for almost all of the sale. In the end the yard sale that seemed like it was going to be washed out was a great success. Over $3200 was raised! Definitely a testimony to God's faithfulness. The rainbow during the storm was the crowd of people and all the shopping they did. The rainbow of God's promise is that He is always with His people and can make the seemingly impossible - POSSIBLE!

The other interesting and totally God thing was once the sale ended and we had everything packed up, had the sanctuary back in order for today's service, and had cleaned it all up, the rain stopped. It misted here and there but the torrential down pour was gone. It was almost like the widow with the oil that ran out when she had no more jars. Once the sale was over and God had done His wonders - the rain ran out. We all had been blessed in so many ways. The Webbs had raised enough money and everyone involved had been able to see God at work. Often we want God to bring the rainbow out without the storm so we don't have to go through it, but in reality God wants to take us through the storm so we can see Him at work.

I am so excited for Dana and Demer as they are able to go forward onto the next stage of their adoption process. I am also so excited because I was able to be reminded that often we forget God is aware of what we need and will be there even when our faith seems to question how in the world He will do it.

In the end, everyone there yesterday and the over 30 families that donated stuff to the yard sale were able to see God at work in the way He works best - In His time and in His way, according to His plan. We may not have seen an actual rainbow yesterday - but we saw the Sonshine all day long!

Learning to Be Still and Know...

2009-03-27T04:32:00.000-07:00

I have sat at my computer several times over the past few days wanting to blog, but having a writing or blogging block. I just can't seem to wrap my mind around what I want to put into my blog. My blog is like a creative outlet for me. It is like an online journal or diary. It is a place to put the thoughts that come to my mind that I want to be able to remember or where I can reflect on the things that God has shown me. I always begin to fret when I go days or weeks without having something to blog about - not that I think I have such wonderful wisdom that others are missing out on because I am not posting, but because I realize that somehow I am not gleaning things from my life that I should be gleaning. I also realize I am probably not enjoying or being mindful of those precious moments my children give me in what they say or what they do. More importantly I am probably not hearing what God is trying to tell me or show me.

When I sit down and try to type out something and nothing seems to come out, I try to consider what is keeping me from going into that place where my fingers seem to take flight across the keyboard and bring forth to life the thoughts that seemed to be floating by in my mind. I think it is all the static that life brings today. I have a thousand thoughts floating in my mind and they just seem to be an obstacle to me getting my blogging thoughts together. It is as if my blogging thoughts are like the frog in Frogger and in order for them to make it to the computer screen they have to cross highways of other thoughts without getting run over.

The sad thing is it often that way when I try to take some quiet time to reflect on my relationship with God or just take quiet time in general. Getting one thought safely across to completion is difficult. There are so many things that seem to get in the way: the roof that needs replacing, getting a 3 year old potty trained, getting the house organized, where did the umbrella go, keeping the kids motivated, trying to get my to do list completed, what to fix for supper, and so much more. It is as if there is just thought overload or a thought traffic jam.

It is at these times I realize I need to learn to be still and learn to just have quiet times where I let my mind rest, let all the noise and confusion, thoughts, and things that need to be done just stay at a distance for a while. Times where I am actually able to reflect on things and appreciate the blessings in my life. Times where I can see the mighty hand of God involved in so many things around me.

I need to take the time to just be quiet. Quiet in my thoughts, quiet in my actions and quiet in my relationship with God.

"Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth."

Psalm 46:10

I Won a Blog Award!

2009-03-23T10:06:00.000-07:00

Thank you Marietta, or should I say Bookworm, for the wonderful award! I am honored to be in the list of bloggers you bestowed this award on! The Bookworm's Booklist is an amazing site. It is a wonderful site for parents to find great children's books.

I will have to take a little time to consider who I will pass on the award to over the next few days. Thanks so much!

Doughnut Hole Theology

2009-03-18T19:08:00.000-07:00

My kids really like doughnuts. In all honesty so do I. Being in the south, Krispy Kreme is the place for doughnuts, but I am just as willing to go to Dunkin Donuts if the occassion arises. I guess I am not a doughnut snob. Cream filled, those with sprinkles, eclairs, glazed, you name it - they are yummy. I also like doughnut holes. You know the little spheres that taste like the big ones, but just aren't quite the same as having a whole doughnut.

One morning recently when I went to get doughnuts for my family, I considered all the different types before me and the fact they were missing that portion in the middle known as the doughnut hole. It dawned on me that as Christians we are often just like the doughnuts minus the middle portion. The middle part that is missing is what we often give to God. Not all of us but a portion of us. The reality is we should give the whole of us and not have a hole in us. Why is it we often give to God just a portion of ourselves and generally we want to choose the portion instead of saying, "here I am God, take all of me"?

We give God the middle "hole" section and keep the rest of it to ourselves. We seem to feel as if that is all God wants from us. That we are not required to give the "whole" of us.

Now I like doughnut holes, but they aren't the same as having the whole doughnut and often the doughnut holes don't even come in all the great and fun flavors that whole doughnuts come in. I can honestly say if given the choice between the hole of a doughnut and the whole doughnut, I would choose the whole one every time. If that would be my choice as a human, why wouldn't the God who created me and sent His son to die for me want the whole of me? Did He create just part of me? No, He created all of me and all of me is what I should give back to Him.

It isn't always easy, and at times I realize I am giving God the hole and not the whole. I think it is important to remember that when we accept the salvation Christ provided for us it makes us whole, so there really shouldn't be a hole at all to from which to give. We are made whole, so in reality isn't that what we should give?

Know Thy Enemy

2009-03-16T14:03:00.000-07:00

I think I have made a discovery. At one time, I thought procrastination was a recessive gene passed on to us by our parents but I think I was wrong. It is an Aggressive Gene. How many of us would be all we think we could be without having such an aggressive force working against us? It falls in with the part of DNA that stands for Do Not Attempt!

I am not sure there is a clear cut way to overcome this force but I do know it is important to keep up the battle. I have started so many things that have merit and are wonderful, but somewhere along the way as soon as I turned my head, or got distracted by another thing that had merit, this gene comes out and takes over. Distraction is its main weapon and Procrastination has the power of the feeling of being Overwhelmed. If, I make an effort to be Supermom, Superwife, or just plain Supergal, my kryptonite or enemy is Procrastination.

I would love to say I am more powerful than a pressure washer, able to leap tall piles of laundry in a single bound, and control all the chaos in my life but I am just who I am. An average person with extraordinary dreams and a desire to see at least some of the become reality. Therefore, if I want to see those dreams become a reality I have to learn to wrangle that Aggressive gene – Procrastination and become victorious. How do you do this you ask? I am not sure, maybe I will think about it later!

I wrote this two years ago and after reviewing the current status of things in my life I would say that while I am trying to win the war against procrastination, lately I have been losing some battles. I am going to win this war! I just know that I can, if not today certainly in the future!

Still a Caterpillar

2009-03-11T18:36:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I have those moments in my life that I just can't quite figure out. Times when I seem to be so close to something and yet so far away from it. Times when I am sure I am on track and then - boom, it just doesn't seem to come together. Times when I thought I knew what God wanted for me but then they just don't work out or don't seem to anyway.

It is at these times I wonder what God is trying to teach me or show me. It is those situations where I wonder what I am doing wrong or is it that I am not doing anything wrong in as much as God is just trying to mold me and show me a better understanding of something.

These are the times when I feel so human. Times when I just don't know how to respond to disapointment in a graceful way. Times when my pettiness, lack of confidence, and uncertainty about the way I think things are seem to loom out before me. Why can't I be better than all of that? Is that what God is trying to bring to my attention so I can weed it out? It is hard when you realize that you really aren't above the feeling of being insecure or feeling like you don't quite belong where you are, when you are supposed to be a child of God.

I often wonder then, is it just an attack by Satan to keep me in a place of feeling like I am less than I am. Of paralysis by analysis so I don't move forward in doing what God has called me to be.

I am not sure that there aren't times in our life allowed by God or designed by Him to make us struggle through these things. They aren't always pleasant but generally when we come out on the other side we are stronger. It just isn't easy while we are in the midst of it. The good thing is that even in the midst or all the storm of uncertainty, God is there.

I am trying to understand and while I do gain wisdom going through these valleys, I know that I won't truly understand until I sit at His feet. Only then will all the sleepless nights, tears, feelings of frustration, spiritual growing pains make sense, but then I also think they will probably be forgotten so it won't really matter. When the total transformation occurs as I see my Savior what purpose would there be for remembering what was when I sit that the feet of the Lord? Does the butterfly remember being a caterpillar? One more question to be answered in eternity.

Potty Training

2009-03-11T13:21:00.000-07:00

We have been working with our youngest with the whole potty training excercise. She is our fourth and you would think we had never gone through this before. Nothing we are trying is working. She has made up her mind that she doesn't want to so therefore she isn't going to. Now if she wasn't over three years of age I wouldn't be so worried, but this is dragging on a little too long.

She loves books. I thought I had found the answer by telling her if she went 10 times in the potty I would buy her a new book. She was all excited and it worked for exactly 3 bathroom trips. When I reminded her that she still had to go seven more times to get her new book, she calmly told me, "It's alright, I already have books." Wow, the novelty of that wore off fast.

We have tried withholding things like candy until she has gone, praising her up a storm for going, trying the big girl approach, you name it - I think I have tried it.

We even have tried making her sit in the bathroom on the potty until she goes. One day it took 40 minutes. Forty minutes of her oldest sister and brother encouraging her from outside the door and me inside reading to her, talking to her, and trying to encourage some more. The next day we tried it again. Jake, my son, called it potty jail. When I went to sit in there with her again, he asked, "Does she get her one phone call?" I looked at him with one of those looks like, I know you didn't just say that. He busted out laughing and went onto whatever else he was doing.

I am about at the end of all my knowledge on how to get her to go potty. A friend told me not to worry and that she didn't see a lot of seven and eight year olds wearing diapers so eventually she would get it. The thing is she gets it, she just doesn't want to. It is funny how even after successfully training three others I have hit an obstacle with this child.

I know somehow we will conquer this issue. In the mean time, if anyone has any original ideas feel free to share.

Great Video by Voddie Baucham - Children of Caesar

2009-03-10T08:39:00.000-07:00

Great Video by Voddie Baucham Jr.! This was brought to my attention by another wonderful blog: The American Home

Voddie is an awesome speaker and if you get the chance to hear him or read his books I would encourage you to do so!

Carry on Baggage Encore

2009-03-09T10:03:00.000-07:00

"For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness."
Ralph Waldo Emmerson

I would venture to say we all have tons of stuff we carry around each day apart from the normal grocery, Target, and Walmart bags of stuff. We carry around our memories, our experiences, our dreams, and ideas. But most of us also carry around much heavier things like sorrow, bitterness, anger, and unforgiven transgressions that just weigh us down. I think the contemporary term is “emotional baggage”. How many carry ons do we have? Is our emotional baggage made by the Boomerang Corporation, you try to lose it but it just keeps coming back?

We shouldn’t keep anger, bitterness in strife in our lives. It becomes oppressive and just keeps us in knots. It is like carrying around excess luggage that doesn’t benefit us. We all have experience and times that make us angry. Sometimes it is at other people or other situations and sometimes we are angry for other people we think that have been mistreated. Anger when worked toward something good is a good thing, but few of us use it for that. We hold onto it let it fester, add it to past grievances, and let it take root in our minds and hearts. It is like the quote: "Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the only one who gets burned. "

We need to let our anger and bitterness go. Let it out and not let it poison our hearts and minds. Anger is a natural response but shouldn’t be a natural condition. Don’t let your emotional baggage keep returning. This is one time you don’t need to put on a return address. We can’t truly love others and ourselves while we harbor bitterness and resentment. Life isn’t always fair, people don’t always act they way we wish they would, and things don’t always end up the way we want them too, and we don’t always have control, but we do control how we react and deal with things.

If you are harboring anger, resentment, and bitterness don’t be an accessory or victim to their crimes, kick them out, call in the joy police and go forward. We can’t fly without paying a penalty if we are over the limit on carry on baggage, the same applies in life with emotional baggage. We will pay a penalty if we carry too much.

Why We Homeschool

2009-03-05T15:57:00.000-08:00

It is often funny the strange looks people sometimes give when they find out we homeschool. Most people are supportive but there are those that look at you funny and then the questions begin. Here are the top 3 I am often asked:

1. How can you stand being around your kids all the time? This is usually followed by the comment, "I would go crazy if mine were with me all the time".

2. Aren't you worried they won't be social enough? What about being around other kids?

3. Is it difficult?

The answer to all three is a joyful no. I have always wondered why people ask the second question. If they took time to really check it out or think about it, homeschool kids have a lot more time to be social than kids do in school. We take a lot more field trips, spend time with homeschool groups, interact more with siblings, and so much more. But this isn't the major reason we homeschool. There are several reasons we do, but one of them that isn't often brought to light is sibling relationships. I love the fact that my kids get to spend time with each other and learn to work with each other every day through out the day. Do they always get along? No, they are human. But as I watch them interact with each other and with other friends, I know that their positive interaction with each other stems a lot from their ability to spend more time together.

I have four kids that are 12, 10, 7, and 3. The older two will soon be 13 and 11. My son the 11 year old is great with his sisters. He has his pesty brother moments but is very caring when it comes to his sisters and even the sisters of his friends. My kids love to go out and see their friends. They rarely meet a stranger, and often surprise people on how out going they are. I am not sure why for some people homeschooling seems like a spectre that makes kids unsocial, unsure, and uncivilized.

We were involved in a homeschool enrichment group last year and we had a field day at the end of the year. It was a wonderful site seing the kids of all ages put on teams together and the older ones helping the younger ones and cheering them on as well. Kids who were not related to other children were tying shoes, helping younger children up and helping to brush off the dirt of those who fell in the haste of an egg race. There was no naming calling, unsportsman like conduct, boasting, or just general meaness. The kids were there to have fun and encourage each other. And there were no parents yelling ugliness from the sidelines.

So, when I am asked why I a homeschool, I have plenty or reasons which include academics and being able to teach the Bible in our classes, but there are other just as important reasons, such as building a stronger family, learning to become who you are not what society says you should be, being able to focus on character and moral issues, and helping my kids develop a close bond with each other.

Why do I homeschool?

Because a three year old can run beside her big brother studying nature outside on a beautiful spring day.

A Twin to Thomas

2009-03-02T08:28:00.000-08:00

I have always thought Thomas the disciple of Jesus is an interesting fellow. The statement regarding "O ye of little faith" definately could reflect his actions at times as they are recorded in the Bible. Thomas had to see the nail scars on the hands of Jesus and had to feel His side to believe in his Lord being ressurected. Thomas needed reassurance that what he thought he believed in was real. At times I think we somewhat scoff at the need for Thomas to have proof. How could a man spend so much time with Jesus, be one of his disciples, and even be willing to die with Christ when he felt they were headed into danger, and yet not believe Christ had risen again and even have the audacity to require physical proof?

It is recorded that Thomas was a twin. Well, with the exception of a great span of time, I could have been his twin. At least his twin in a spiritual sense. How often do I have doubts, or require proof that God is understanding of where I am? How often do I seem to need to feel the scars to remind me that the Christ of the Bible is still with me today? I never doubt my faith in God or in Jesus, but my doubt often is entrenched in my inability to totally grasp God and His love for me my inability to understand what is totally required of me.

When my dreams or hopes seemed to be dead, I often want to know God is capable or resurecting them. When I seem to be tossed about in the storms of life, I want to know what God's plan is to protect me and my family. "O ye of little faith", could be used to describe me as well.

I am not able to touch the nail scarred hands at this time, but I know I will one day. Until then Christ shows His love for me in everyday little things and some really big things at times. I pray that in the mean time that I will require less from God as my faith increases and that the cry of Thomas, "My Lord and my God", will go before me as I walk through life.

I have to wonder at how Thomas felt at that moment when he first truly understood who Christ was. There will be a day when we all stand before Christ and truly understand with more open eyes the magnitude of our decisions here while on earth. I am sure as Thomas watches, he will understand the joy and magnitude of understanding of those who made the decision to accept Christ as their savior. I think Thomas would understand our moments of wavering and our moments of great fervor for Jesus.

Thomas was a man in a long ago time, in a far off place from where I am now but, I know Thomas and I would have gotten along well, afterall we are very much the same.

Where the Domesticated Things Are...

2009-02-22T15:38:00.000-08:00

This past Saturday we went on a little family outing to an animal ranch near Stone Mountain. It was a beautiful day weather wise and the kids had a wonderful time. Well the older three did at least in the beginning. Emily, the youngest, was not as excited about being near the animals when we first started our hike through the park. She is just not overly adventerous until she gets more comfortable with her surroundings, well at least outdoors that is. She loves to go shopping and never seems to have a problem visiting new stores. :)

We got to feed several of the animals including your basic barnyard types, deer, squirrels, and a bear - he was in a cage.

Barnyard animals are kind of funny in that everytime I see them in this kind of setting they remind me of people. Just in the way they act, pose, or relate to people or each other.

There are the social ones. These reminded me of my three oldest. Confident in having each other close by.

Then there are the more daring types.

The first thing that came to mind when I saw this animal was the direction of government (not one particular person - just in a general sense) or greed in general.

Then there were these cute domesticated things. I kept them and brought them home with me!

It was a fun trip and a beautiful day. One of those days when you see God's hands at work from the wonder of creation to the wonder and sparkle in your children's eyes. It was one of those days that as the sun set, I made sure to say thank you to my Father for all His many blessings.

Truth Be Told

2009-02-19T05:02:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I was getting the kids ready for Bible study at the home of our small group leaders. I was helping my oldest fix her hair, which was nice because she seldom wants me to do that. We were in my bathroom because it is bigger and the younger two girls were in the tub. I needed a pony tail holder because I was pulling the top portion of Michaela's hair back. As is usual with three daughters there was not a pony tail holder to be found in the near vacinity. I decided to take the one in my hair out and put it in hers. I had pulled my hair up earlier in the day and when I pulled my hair out my naturally curly hair sort of went everywhere. Anna my third child looked up and said, "Mommy, you hair looks horrible." I turned to her with a smile and said, "Thanks, Anna."

She looked at me and said, "Well I have tell the truth. You should always tell the truth."

"Yes", I said, "you should tell the truth." I went on to tell her, that sometimes you should find a kind way to be honest with people though. Her reply was, "just tell the truth, it is simpler."

Yes, I suppose it is simpler and we should be honest. I just hope one day she can find a way to be honest without hurting people's feelings. I understand Anna so her sometimes brutal honesty doesn't bother me, but I know she is going to have problems later in life with others until they get to know her. Anna is refreshing most of the time, she just tells you how she sees it. She has always been the most reliable to oversee things when the kids were in another room playing. She has a strict sense of justice and generally follows the rules.

I learn a lot from my kids. The truth is you can find more truth in child's understanding of things, than many adults that are around us. I know I can always go to Anna and ask, "does this outfit look good on me?" I know without a doubt, she will let me know one way or the other.

Commanded to do Likewise

2009-02-17T05:59:00.000-08:00

"Adoption is not about finding children for families, it's about finding families for children" Joyce Maguire Pavao

Since my friend Dana started her journey into adopting a child from Ethiopia, God has shown me so much in regards to the issue of orphans throughout the world. I have been amazed at the sheer numbers of children that are orphans and astounded at the need. I have also been touched by the efforts of so many to help the children, help communities that are in need of so much, and the efforts of those who reach out to others in need in selfless ways.

I have also been amazed by the process and financial requirements to adopt a child. Not that I am criticising it, but that it just shows the love and willingness of the families that adopt to go through the mountains of paperwork, self reflection, and financial sacrifice to grow their family through adoption and give hope and a home to a child.

I think my attitude towards this issue was always one of sympathy. It was sort of reflected in the first part of the quote above, I felt adoption was about finding children for families. I knew there were orphans and I felt a certain sadness about it, but like the two that passed the beaten man on the side of the rode in Luke chapter 10, I had other things to get to.

I thought it wasn't really in my sphere of influence to change anything about this, so I didn't feel compelled to even try. What I failed to realize and accept is that God has commanded me to care about it and so I can not pass on the other side of the road and be in His will. I am commanded to care for orphans. I am commanded to give to the least of these. I am commanded to welcome the little children in His name.

I think often as Christians, we seek to distance ourselves from issues because we feel if God wanted us to do something about it, He would put us directly in the line of fire for that issue. That may be the case at times, but the reality of it is we are commanded to do many things in the Bible that we consider optional. I think we also take our spiritual gifts as Get Out of God's Calling items. We sit back and say, "my spiritual gifts aren't really in hospitality or caring for others," or "I don't feel called to do something about that." The reality is we all don't receive the same calling for everything, but there are things we are all called and commanded to do. Loving our neighbor as ourself is not a suggestion, it is a command. We are sprititually, physically, and financially gifted in different ways but that doesn't give us license to get out of something, but rather gives us different ways to give to something. Are we all called to adopt a child? No - but we are all called to do what we can for the orphans of the world. We are called to pray for them, pray for the families that are trying to adopt them, pray for the countries of these orphans, pray for the care givers of the orphans, etc. We can assist those caring for them or adopting them by providing financially as we are able. We can give of our time, talents, and love.

We need to realize that regardless of our blessings, gifts, and calls of service we are never excused of passing by on the other side. We are called to the role of Samaritan in any compacity. You may not be able to bandage a wound, but you can run and get the bandage, you might not be able to cook for a large group, but you can make the lemonade or help purchase the food, you might not be able to adopt an orphan, but you can pray for the children and help a family that is being called to give a child a family.

At the end of the parable of the Good Samaritan in Luke 10:30-37, Jesus asked the man whom He was talking to,"Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?"

The man replied, "The one who had mercy on him."
Jesus told him, "Go and do likewise."

We are also commanded to go and do "likewise".

Should the "Stimulus" Stimulate a Christian Response?

2009-02-13T03:53:00.000-08:00

stim·u·lus
n. pl. stim·u·li
1. Something causing or regarded as causing a response.
2. An agent, action, or condition that elicits or accelerates a physiological or psychological activity or response.
3. Something that incites or rouses to action; an incentive:

There is a lot of talk these days about the "Stimulus Package" in Washington. It is the measure that is suppose to "save" our economy and basically save us from ourselves. There are a few things I think we are failing to remember:

1. We have thrown money at the educational system for years and that is no closer to being fixed than it was since the problems began.

2. A stimulus that doesn't fix the roots of the problem is only a bandaid that will not last. Greed and bad decisions are what brought us here. It isn't something that happened over night and it wasn't something as simple someone transposing a digit in a ledger.

But I digress, this isn't meant to be soapbox regarding the "Stimulus Plan" It doesn't matter which side of "The Plan" you stand on it is apparent something(s) needs to change.

So, back to my question, "Should the Stimulus Stimulate Christian Stimuli"?

I believe the answer is YES! This a time when we need to return to the church of Acts 2. We need to come together and give to each other and those who are in need. I would encourage you to read Acts 2 and the example of what the Church is supposed to be. These are the times that give the Church the best opportunities to work, serve, and draw others closer to Christ.

Instead of waiting on the government to bail us out of our moral stupor and apathetic trance, we should be lighting a fire underneath us to spread joy, comfort, and whatever assistance we can. I am not not necessarily talking about throwing money at the problems. Yes, that may need to be done in some cases, but what we need to be doing is looking for ways to reach out by reaching in. We need to be willing to give of our time, talents, and possessions if need be. We need to be willing to truly become disciples of Christ. We need to heed the lessons of Matthew 25:31-46:

31"When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his throne in heavenly glory. 32All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.
34"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'

37"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'

40"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'

41"Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.'

44"They also will answer, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?'

45"He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.'

46"Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life."

We often sit around and wait for His glorious reappearing, when we need to be about a glorious reengineering of ourselves and a church. Why do we wait on the Lord when we should be about our Father's business? Aren't these the times that give us the chance to show the world what our Father is about? When was the last time, you had such a chance to show Christ and love to the least of these?

A few Sunday's ago, my daughter Anna who is seven was sitting in church and as the offering plate was being passed she took out some of her prettiest rocks and crystal like fragments and wanted to put them in the offering plate to give them to the church. She knew our church had been running behind on tithes and offerings and she wanted to give what she had. I gently and quietly told her that she couldn't put them in and that I would tell her why later. She looked sad, but listened to me. After church I explained to her that God was very proud of her for being willing to give up her treasures for Him. I also told her I was very proud of her. I explained that the church wouldn't be able to turn them into money. She smiled and I could tell she understood. She was willing to give what she had. She had left her money at home but wanted to give to God what she had. The next week she brought her change and put it in the offering plate. I know that was sacrificial as well since she doesn't get an allowance. Any change she has is found in a cushion or she just happens upon.

The reality is and we have to face it, the Church is failing to give all it can with all that it has. There are over 140 million orphans in the world, there are millions of homeless people, families in poverty, and millions of others that don't truly know who Christ is. Have we given up on digging in and giving to God all we have? Are we clenching our money and time and abilites in our fist so that they can't do anyone any good?

Should the Stimulus stimulate a Christian response? Without a doubt, would be my answer. There is no better time to shine His light than when all seems the darkest.

The Dolly and Blankie Effect

2009-02-09T05:15:00.000-08:00

When I was a child I had a blanket that went with me everywhere. I slept with it at night and wasn't able to really sleep really well if I didn't have it. My youngest child doesn't have a blankie but she has Dolly. Dolly is a Raggedy Ann doll that she received on her first birthday from my parents. Dolly has been almost every where with us. Dolly was and is a part of her. If she didn't like something, Dolly didn't like it. If she wasn't tired, Dolly wasn't tired. Sometimes I would ask her a question and she would respond that Dolly did or didn't like it without even saying whether she did.

She actually has another Ragedy Ann doll that is a little different than Dolly. If we tried to pasify her with it if Dolly coudn't be located, she would tell us, "It not Dolly". Looked liked Dolly and seemed liked dolly, but to her, it wasn't Dolly. Dolly still goes with us most places and everyone at church knows Dolly and knows who she belongs to or who belongs to Dolly. :)

The security of a blankie or a Dolly generally doesn't last after we get older. We find other things to make us feel secure - friends, other items, the dreaded chocolate, money, etc. The sad thing is for a lot of Christians, yours truly included, we have the best security in God and in Jesus, and yet we cling to all of our blankies and Dollies. We look for comfort in things moth can corrupt and fire can destroy. We think that other things can be like God, but in reality it is a substitute and not God. Amazing an 18 month old knew the difference in two very similar dolls but yet we often choose a very different substitute for comfort instead of the only one that can truly offer us a lasting comfort and security.

My daughter's Dolly went with her everywhere when she was younger. Amazingly, we only lost her once and thankfully she was found at the Lost and Found at Walmart within about 15 minutes. I think we often leave God at home when we go out or forget where we last put Him. We don't begin to look until we are in crisis mode. On the occassion that Emily put Dolly somewhere where we weren't sure where it was, we all scrambled to find her. We do the same thing. When the waves began to crash around us we look for God whom we felt went away but in reality we were the ones that put Him at a distance. Dolly is incapable of ever leaving Emily because she is a stuffed doll, if Emily can't find her it is because Emily left her somewhere and didn't keep up with her. God doesn't leave us not because He isn't capable of it, but because He told us He wouldn't. What a comforting thought, He doesn't leave. If we are looking for Him it is because of what we did, but He stays right there and waits for us to find Him.

I still have what is left of my blankie - a tattered piece of fabric with several holes. It was well loved. Dolly looks well loved as well she definately has the Raggedy going for her. Just like Dolly and blankie we all have our worn spots and holes - the great thing about finding comfort in God is that he stitches the holes and mends the worn spots with His grace and Love. His love doesn't make us worn, but can make us all together a different kind of Holy.

Emily goes to bed with Dolly, gets up with Dolly, and takes Dolly with her through the day. I pray that I will feel that way about God. That I go to bed reflecting on my relationship with God, get up and start my day with God, and take Him with me throughout the day. I hope that should I look up and realize He isn't right there, that I will stop everything, and return to where I left Him.

Resisting to Continue the Journey

2009-02-06T04:06:00.000-08:00

Our Father refreshes us on the journey with some pleasant inns, but will not encourage us to mistake them for home.

C.S. Lewis (1898-1963) The Problem of Pain

This is a thought provoking quote from C.S. Lewis. I think one of the biggest problems Christians face is our inability to move beyond a comfortable place. We want a church and relationships that don't tax us, challenge us, or cause us to truly grow. We want to feel good, forget for a while, and fellowship without the presence of life, reality, and the call to action.

Many times we forget we are journeying here and should be awaiting His call for where He would lead us whether that be in our own community, church, place of business, or in a different geographic location. We are to be available to go forward even in a matter of growing in Him and that doesn't always take us to pleasant places. God isn't a Bed and Breakfast kind of God. A bed and breakfast vacation spot beckons leisure, slow pace, and a lack of responsibility. No, I think God is more into, Let's Pitch a Tent, Build a Fire, and Go Catch Some Fish. All those require action and require us to get off our backsides and do something. Christianity is not a call to leisure and if we think that is our reward here, we are sadly mistaken. God's call is not one to leisure, but one to following His lead and going forth. Now, that doesn't mean God won't bring us into times of rest, but they are seasons and not fixed times that go on forever.

Take time to evaluate your "walk" as of late. If you realize that you can't see where you walked into your current spot, that the "grass" has grown up around you, and there doesn't seem to be any marking of you being in the area, consider this, "leave no trace" is for actual walking in the wilderness, not walking with God. If you are doing what He has called you to do there should be a trace of your handiwork and seeds of His love being spread.

Get refreshed when He leads you to a pleasant inn, but don't consider it a finishing point - just another launching point. God grants us rest, but He doesn't grant us a permanent vacation.

I wrote this a year ago and it came to me today while I was wishing my life was in an easier place. I have found through much trial and error - a lot of trial due mostly to my error - that I find more of God in the rough spots because I am looking for Him than I do in the comfortable places. I tend to take my eyes off of Him when the waters are calm so to speak. Not totally, of course, but I let my guard down and that is when the waves begin to rise. I hope I don't ever get too comfortable so that I get complacent in my journey to learning more about Him and having my faith strengthened.

The Butterfly Effect

2009-02-02T06:34:00.000-08:00

I am sure most of you have heard a saying that goes something like this, "if a butterfly flaps its wings in Africa today it will affect the weather across the globe in the near future". This stems from a theory called the Butterfly Effect. The easiest definition of this I have found is:

"The phrase refers to the idea that a butterfly's wings might create tiny changes in the atmosphere that may ultimately alter the path of a tornado or delay, accelerate or even prevent the occurrence of a tornado in a certain location. The flapping wing represents a small change in the initial condition of the system, which causes a chain of events leading to large-scale alterations of events." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butterfly_effect)

The application in our lives is that if something seemingly small happens somewhere else distant from us, does it affect us? Can an occurrance in a far off place like Africa affect me here in America or someone that I know? Where at one time I would have said I don't think so, I can now say, yes it does! My wonderful friend Dana and her husband have felt called by God to grow their family through adoption. They have two beautiful children now, but feel that God is calling them to share their amazing capacity to love and see God glorified in other's lives by adopting a child from Ethiopia.

It is amazing how the events in someone else's life can change your heart and your way of thinking. Watching them on this journey, which they are just beginning on, has made me think about so many things. One of the things is how gracious and loving God is to adopt me into His family through my acceptance of the sacrifice of His son. Why would the birth of a baby in Georgia more than 3 decades ago cause an effect or even be a blip on God's radar? Why? Because He created me, He knew me before I was born, loved me even though He knew I wasn't perfect and that I wouldn't be the perfect child. He was even willing to send His only true son to die for me thousands of years before I was even brought into this world. Yes, those who accept His gift of salvation are adopted into His family. What amazing love and grace!

As our friends start on this journey I think what they are doing is wonderful. The time, effort, money, patience, and prayer this journey will take is an awesome responsibility and task. But one they say is worth it, not just because this child is worth it but, because obediance in God's calling is always worth it.

There are many that God calls to adopt and become parents to those that are orphans. There are many that God has other plans for that don't necessary have them traveling the road to adopting a child, but even these people are called to aid those who are on the adoption road. In James 1:27 it is written that, "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." While some are called to bring children into families through adoption, others of us are called to help those bringing them into their families. We are all called to aid widows and orphans. How can we aid them? Through prayers, fund raising, encouraging them along the way, and whatever else God may lay on our heart. Responding in obediance to God is often not easy, but it is made easier with the love and prayers of others.

I would encourage you to read my friend's blog titled Our All in All as they go on their journey.

A long time ago in a place far from here, a baby was born in Bethlehem and placed in a manger because there was no room at the inn and that has had an effect far more reaching than the flapping of a butterfly's wings. I am not sure whether the actual flapping of the wings of a butterfly in Africa changes the weather here in Georgia, but I do know that the birth of a baby there will change a family and the lives of many others here forever. There is nothing seemingly too small or too distant that God can't use to change the lives in a beautiful way of those willing to be obediant to Him.

Walking Through the House With the Lights Off

2009-01-30T13:14:00.000-08:00

Have you ever noticed how careful you are when you walk through the house at night without the lights on? In your mind you have a layout of where the furniture is and you sort of feel you way along. One of the most awakening and painful experiences as a parent is to step on Legos on the floor with barefeet when you are not expecting them. The thought of banning the colorful, little, child loving, plastic pieces comes to mind as do some words that are better left unsaid. When you step on a Lego in the dark it is not an experience soon forgotten. Neither is any other experience such as tripping over a child's shoe or other item that was left and not picked up. Then there is the times when you hit your toe or toes on a piece of furniture.

It is amazing at how are senses seem intensified when we walk through a darkened house. We know the lay of the land so to speak but still walk carefully and feel our way toward our destination. Why is it we don't use the same care when we walk through life? Many times we walk through uncharted territory or even well known areas. There are plenty of landmines and life Legos that we can step on. There are temptations to stub our pride or faith on and yet, we charge through like bulls in a china shop and then often are surprised at what we have to face or what we have messed up. In our house we can switch on the light to light our path and make it safer. In the world we are given direction by God as our light to navigate the darkened pathways we often have to trod.

Why do we intensify our senses in a dark house, but let down our guard in the real world? I think sometimes like our house we become too comfortable in the world and feel too comfortable in our ability to navigate where we are. When do you run into the furniture in your house? I always do when I go to quickly or don't take the time to feel ahead to make sure I know where it is. Overconfidence and miscalculation often bring pain and even if I navigate those obstacles, there are always things I can't see in the dark. The noisy toy that goes off with the slightest touch or the ever wonderful Star Wars character that doesn't quite mesh with the bottom of my foot and makes you feel like you have gone to the dark side of the force when you think about the lecture your child will get in the morning.

If we are still capable of miscalculating a safe route in our comfort zones how effective we are when we try to navigate in the world without having a detailed map? We may not have a map for everywhere we go, but we do have direction from God if we choose to follow His direction. The problem is we often charge ahead with our own will and self-inflated confidence in how things are. It is like charging down the hallway at night where there isn't any furniture only to be stopped in our path by a Thomas the Train engine left on the floor.

I think the key is to slow down, ask for guidance and not overestimate our ability to find our way. In reality the problem probably lies in the last two words of the previous sentence - "our way". If we are following God's way we are less likely to run into unpleasant things or trip over the pitfalls in life.

So, the next time you walk throught the house without the lights on, think about how you walk through life. Be careful, there is always a stealth Lego or Matchbox car with your name on it if you plow ahead without caution. The best way to go is to turn on the light and don't try to see the way through the dark. When you are out of the house the same applies, turn on The Light.

What's in a Name?

2009-01-28T13:16:00.000-08:00

Juliet:
"What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet."
Romeo and Juliet (II, ii, 1-2)

When my oldest child was six years old we were out driving one Saturday to lunch. We were in some traffic and coming up to a red light. As my husband and I were talking about something my daugther spoke up and said, "Mom, look at all the hookers!" Now, at this point I am flabbergasted and appauled. Where in the world would my precious child know anything about "hookers"? I jerked my head in the direction she was pointing to see a dry cleaning van with a long row of hangers hanging up in its window still swinging side to side from the van stopping at the light. I about lost it in laughter, but with mom type of control I didn't laugh out loud, she was pointing to the hangers or "hookers" as she had called them. Sad how my mind had come up with the seedier version of that word and had not considered she may be thinking of something else. I gently corrected her and said they were called hangers not hookers. Now I knew why she left her close on the floor, she needed to know they were for hanging her clothes up not for just hooking onto the clothes rack. :)

I have thought of this story often, especially when I drive by a dry cleaning van. It often makes me think of how we define things and what we call them. Sure, the hangers hooked onto something but that isn't what we call them. How many times in our lives do we look like something but are actually called something else by those that don't know us. What labels do we carry as we go out in the world and would we be called what we are by those that don't know us?

Are we called a Christian because we are seen in church or because of our actions, dress, and how we treat others? Are we called a mom because of the care and love we give our children or because we drag 4 screaming kids into McDonalds and start griping at them to hush and behave. What defines a mom or Christian? Hangers and "hookers" are doing the same job but the connotation is very different in our language. I think the same goes for the words Christian and mom. There are positive connotations and examples of them and not so positive ones. I think it is time we really paid attention attention to how we reflect those words. We shouldn't look to others in how we define them but to the one who created both.

What's in a name? The difference between a smile and a "you're right, honey" and a jerk of the head in astonishment with the strangled cry of WHAT?!

On the Outside Looking In...

2009-01-28T11:16:00.000-08:00

Everytime I hear the expression, "it was like being on the outside looking in", I picture the image of a child looking in an old fashioned toy store window at a toy they would really love to have, and wondering if it is ever possible for them to have it. This expression often means that someone on the outside of a situation can usually see it from a different perspective than someone in the situation themselves. It also can express someone feeling left out of a situation and they are just viewing if from beyond the situation.

How often do we feel that way at times? Are there times when we see things going on inside and we feel we are standing outside of them looking into them? I think at times when we are struggling with things in our own life and we look around and see friends or others we know with seemingly wonderful families, marriages, or lives we can feel this way. We look around and think, why can't my life be that way, or what I am I doing wrong, or why does God allow this to happen, or why doesn't God fix this? Putting ourselves on the outside looking in, can be very frustrating and lonely if we stay there.

Do we feel as if what we really want is beyond our grasp? Is it on the other side of a cheery, warm, well lit window where the friendly hustle and bustle of everyone inside seems oblivious to us staring in through the window from the cold, darker, and lonely street? Or do we feel as if they see us, but lack the willingness to invite us in their "perfect" world? Then there are those that they would come outside to invite us in, but then once inside they go back to their hustle and bustle and don't really include us so now we are on the inside, but emotionally we are still outside.

I think it is at times like this that we can all feel the loneliest. We feel we are outside in some way. Not always able to stay physically outside, but unable to be totally included even if we are physically inside.

The question becomes why are we on the outside? Is it because we put ourselves there or were we put there? I think often we have as much to do as to why we are there. Often we feel we are there when we really don't need to be there. We often feel disconnected from people or a situation because we feel as if we are the only one dealing with issues or that others just don't get it. And sometimes we blame others thinking that is their fault for not including us or being so busy with their "perfect" lives.

I think it is important to remember that no one has a "perfect" life. We often see what we want to see or what others want us to see. Everyone struggles with things in their lives. Sometimes I think we are on the outside looking in for a reason. Sometimes we just don't fit into the situation and sometimes we have to learn what is truly important.

I think at times we have to stop and not focus so much on where we think we should be but where God wants us to be. Maybe we have to get back in His will or maybe we are in His will right where we are. Which ever the case, maybe we are outside for a reason or maybe for a season. God puts other's lives in our paths to show us many things and to help us along. If we allow Satan to get in and monkey with things he can take it and twist it and make us feel alone or on the outside. It also has the potential to allow the green eyed monster known as jealousy to come in and stay for a bit. In some ways as Christians we should all be on the outside of what the world would have us be a part of. In other situations we often emotionally place ourselves outside and feel as if we are alone.

We aren't all meant to live the same lives, where would the testimony in that be? We have to stop feeling like we are on the outside looking in and realize we should be on the inside of the family of God looking out. Looking out for those who are looking in and wondering what we are about. We shouldn't be to busy to bring those on the outside in, and to share our story of how we came to be on the outside. When we feel like we are on the outside of things we need to stop and ask ourselves why? If we are in Him, then we are in the best inside ever. Why should the rest matter?

The reality is at times it does. It doesn't mean the reality is right just that it is. When we feel this way, we need to step back and take inventory on the many blessings we do have and the distance we have come in Him. I have felt on the outside way at times and when I stop to realize it is Satan trying to steal my joy, I am able to stop feeling like the forlorn child outside the bright toy store and realize that whatever may lie in there is probably things that moth and fire can corrupt and destroy. It isn't always easy and at times it may take a little while.

The goal in this life is that when time ends that I am not a lost child on the outside looking into the glorious and bright window of heaven knowing that there is no way into the warm glow that is in there. We may often be on the outside of things here on earth, but better to be on the outside here than on the outside in eternity. Whatever I may be on the outside of here or think I am on the outside of here, is nothing compared to what I will be in, on the inside in my Father's house.

The Waiting Place

2009-01-24T13:35:00.001-08:00

Have you ever been in that place where you seem to be waiting on God? In that place where you have a passion and desire for something that God has shown you only to not be able to get quite there yet? It is the place where we wait - waiting for the child you are adopting, waiting for everything to come together so you can do what God is calling you to do, waiting for those around you to catch the vision, waiting for the answer to prayer. It is just on this side of the fulfillment of the vision God has shared with you or what He has called you to.

This Waiting Place is a very difficult place. It is full of all kinds of emotions - joy, excitement, impatience, frustration, desire, questioning, and generally full of prayer. Prayer for patience, for guidance, for wisdom, for reassurance, and prayer for things to hurry along.

It is often the place where we often seek reassurance that we are on the same page with God. Why is it we have this desire or vision, and things seem to be in a holding pattern? This is a place of a lot of "Why God?"

I have often found that it is at these time that we have to learn patience, learn to lean on God all the more. I am sure that is part of the reason we end up in the Waiting Place. It is a time when our faith can be tested and we have to draw closer to God to get through this place.

I will have to admit I am not the best at waiting in the Waiting Place. I often feel frustrated, impatient, and begin questioning whether I really understood what God was showing me. I suppose my inability to have the proper attitude and right amount of faith in the Waiting Place in previous times in my life is the reason I continue to have to go through it and seem to stay there for the longest time. God is always faithful and eventually He calls me out of the place. Sometimes what lies on the other side of the Waiting Place isn't quite what I expected (that can be a good thing) and sometimes it is even more than I expected, but it is always what He knew it would be.

The one great thing I have found in the Waiting Place is the people that often are waiting as well. God is never a put you in a Waiting Place alone kind of God. He knows we weren't made to go through the Waiting Place alone. Sometimes people I have met sail through and I am not able to spend a lot of time with them and some times others wait as long as I do and we form a bond in the Waiting Place. We all have different visions, desires, and calls from God we are waiting to go forward toward. The neat thing is regardless of where and what we are being called to, we don't have to wait alone. The people we meet and form a bond with while in the Waiting Place are God's gifts to us and a way of letting us know He is still with us and understands what is going on.

I hope one day, I become better about waiting in the Waiting Place. That my faith will be stronger and I will have more patience to wait on God and truly understand that it is according to His time and not mine that things take place.

If you find yourself in the Waiting Place today or tomorrow, don't worry - there are a lot of us there. Pull up a seat, not a comfy one - you don't want to get too comfortable, and come and visit.

Where Does the Time Go?

2009-01-19T11:26:00.000-08:00

I am so excited! I think I have fixed the computer issues that were keeping me from blogging! Now back to our regular scheduled blog...

Our youngest turns three today. We actually celebrated last night with some friends from our church. It was a Chuck E. Cheese night. Not an organized one with Mr. Mouse, just friends geting together there for supper and cake. Chuck E. Cheese is one of my least favorite places, but one of those things you do for your kids that you definately don't do for yourself. I take 2 tylenol, put a smile on my face, and enter through the doors to chaos. Sunday evenings generally are not too bad, but last night was because today is a school holiday. Note to self - Never ever go again on a non-school night! Oh, well Emily only turns three once and she is our youngest so we shouldn't have too many more years of this kind of thing.

It is hard to believe she is three. It seems like yesterday we celebrated her turning one:

Here is a picture of her from yesterday at her birthday with her daddy:

It is amazing at how fast our children grow. I think at times as adults we forget how quickly time is marching on. We have but a short time to teach our children all the things we want to teach them, to spend time with them, and forge a relationship that stands the test of life and time. I often stand in awe of the great task I have before me everyday when it comes to raising our kids. They are all real blessings all the time, total bundles of joy most of the times, and patience testers some of the time.

Though there are character issues we have to continually work on, and academics that we strive for, they are priceless. All of them!

This is my oldest who has the Indian name: She Who Thinks She Knows Everything But Doesn't! The joys of an almost 13 year old!

This is my son and his Indian name is: He Who Needs to Show More Self Control and Patience! You have to feel for him at times being the only son with three sisters.

This is our third child and her Indian name is: She Who Needs to Whine less and Listen More. She is very literal and has an interesting take on the world.

When I look at my children, I am often reminded of the parable Jesus told in Matthew 25:14-39 about the rich man who was going on a journey and left some money with three different slaves. He gave each a different amount according to each's ability. When he returned he called them in each for an accounting of what they had done with what he had given them. The first two had increased their master's money while the third had burried and hid it away. The first two were rewarded with more responsibility and with their master saying, "Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!" While the third that did nothing with what he was given was cast out and chastised for his actions. I see my children as gifts that God has given me to teach them about Him and help them on the road to a strong relationship with Him. When I stand before Him one day, I hope He will be able to say, "Well done, good and faithful servant! Come and share you master's happiness!"

I know that each day that goes by is one less that I have to work towards the goals my Heavenly Father has set for me. So, before the next birthdays I know I have a lot to do and so little time to do it. We often think we have a lifetime, but in reality we don't know how much time we have. We should always be about turning the gifts God has given us into our Master's happiness.

Walking with the Father - A Reminder

2009-01-15T20:50:00.000-08:00

I wrote this back in 2007 and it came to mind today as I watched my youngest taking off her socks to go barefoot. My kids have always been the barefoot kind of kids. I will have to say I am too. There is something so freeing and fun about going barefoot. I will have to say that in this cold weather though, I am sticking with my slippers and Jake, my son did have socks on today. But Emily the youngest just doesn't like socks on without shoes so she took them off as soon as she could. I think at times we all need some barefoot time.

Walking Barefoot with the Father

When my oldest child was four she was a typical 4 year old with many questions and her own insight into things. I will never forget the day I was driving she and my 2 year old home from day care one summer day. Both my husband and I worked at the time. It was a beautiful early evening in summer and there were huge puffy white clouds in the sky with the light blue sky you get just before the colors of sunset appear. My daughter was looking out the window and seeing what shapes the clouds were. She was telling me she saw a duck, a rabbit, an so forth. Suddenly, she said, “I see God.” I smiled and said, “You do?” She went on to say, “Yes, and you know what He isn’t wearing shoes, He has bare feet.” I thought this was really cute. She got quiet again, I looked back in the rear view mirror, and she was smiling. I thought it was another one of those wonderful moments that children give us but didn’t think too much more about it. The next day I went to work and I just had to share the story with one of my co-workers. As I was telling her about it the smile that was on her face disappeared and she looked at me with disbelief. After I was done, I said, “What?” “What is wrong?” She said, “Nothing, let me tell you another story.”

She went onto tell me about a friend she had that had a daughter that was about 11. The friend was a single mother and the little girl’s father had never been in the picture so to speak. When her daughter got in trouble, her mom would send her to her room to talk to her Heavenly Father. One day she got in trouble and her mom sent her up there to talk to her Father. After a while, she went upstairs to talk to her daughter about her behavior and what she had learned. While she was talking to her she asked if she had talked to God about her behavior and the daughter said, “Yes, I saw Him too” The mother asked, “What did He look like?” Her daughter replied, “He wasn’t wearing shoes.” Both my coworker and I were blown away. Here were two girls, who were different ages and didn’t know each other with the same description of God.

To this day, I often recall that story, as I look up at summer time clouds similar to the ones my daughter was looking at that day. I am still amazed when I recall this story that God chose to walk barefoot into two little girls’ lives on different days and different occasions. He also knew the way they would relate to him best. I think sometimes in our “grown up” lives we forget that God wants us to remember we are His children and he understands where we are and how to relate to us. Often we choose to view God as this all powerful identity that is far away and is not interested in our daily lives. He must be too busy running the universe to see or care about what I am dealing with. When in reality He is waiting on us to see His invitation to come and walk with him even if we don’t bring our shoes.

There is a freedom we seem to feel when we walk with bare feet. There is some danger to of stubbing our toe if we are not careful, but the freedom we feel without the confinement of shoes is wonderful. We can’t be careless and walk through the thorns but if we choose our path carefully we can feel the coolness of the grass, the refreshment of a cool stream, the warmth of the sand. When our feet are bound up in shoes or confined we seem to trudge forward, but when we go barefoot we become more light hearted and have a spring in our step. This is how we can feel when we loosen the ties that bind our every day life that seem to trap us and make us feel bound. If we are willing to kick off our shoes, we will experience so much more than, if we trudge forward in our daily grind. Don’t wait! God is there and waiting to take a walk – no shoes needed, just bring your bare feet!

Finding Our Value In Him and Not in Them

2009-01-14T07:29:00.000-08:00

I have at different times in my life struggled with feeling whether I matter to others. I am sure we all go through times in our lives like this. Some of the trappings of the fraility and ego of being human I suppose. It is amazing at how hurt and sad we can feel when those who we like and love say things or do things which make us feel like we don't really matter or are not in an equal footing as we thought we were. We feel unimportant, belittled, like we are failing in some way, or that we just don't matter.

I know that many times these attacks come from satan himself as he tries to make us feel like less than a child of the King. The hardest part is when he uses those closest to us to achieve his goals.

I have learned over time that why it is still painful to go through these times, I have to realize that my true value comes from a relationship with God through the sacrifice of Jesus. There are people in my life who may not value my time, my talents, or are unwilling to do even a small thing to help me out, but Jesus went to the cross for me and laid down His life so that I might live eternally with Him. Shouldn't my value come from Him and not Them?

Others in our life will disappoint us, hurt us, and fall short of what we think they should be, but that shouldn't surprise us. We often do the same things to others. In an unperfect world, why are we surprised when our value seems diminshed by an imperfect measure?

I am not sure there is a quick cure for the pain when we feel this way, but I do know if we can focus on finding our value from a perfect Heavenly Father through the perfect sacrifice in His Son, then we can find our way again. I am not perfect, but there is one that was willing to pay the ultimate price to have an eternal relationship with me. It is with Him that I should find my value. Not that I should be arrogant or haughty in how I see this, but that when those who wound me lash out that, I can find refuge in the one who is perfect and finds me worth giving up Himself so that I might live and be perfected in Him.

Where Nothing Seems Right

2009-01-06T19:44:00.000-08:00

I seem to awaken in another land that gave me a fright.
It was a dark hardened land where nothing seemed right.

It didn’t matter what I did or what actions others took
Everyone was chastised as if they were a crook

Just a glance or look, a simple comment or action
It was all misunderstood and taken with great aggravation.

This land was full of “why didn’t you do this?” and “how could you think I would like that?”
It was laden with criticisms of all shapes and sizes.

People were cynical and selfishness was all around.
No kind thought or word of encouragement did abound.

As I walked on I saw a church, Praise God I thought, here I should find rest.
But to my amazement it was here too. The music wasn’t quite right, people were mumbling, “No, I didn’t like the sermon or from where it was coming”, and “did you see what they wore and how she was dressed?”

I was shocked and I was frightened. This world was quite scary and the worst part was all the unkindness they seem to carry.

It was husband nagging wife, mothers harping on children.
Neighbors with not a kind thing to say and many being driven away
by unkind thoughts and careless words meant to hurt and drive wedges.
There seem to be no peace, in this land where nothing seems right.

As I walked on weeping, I noticed a man coming my way. He seemed different and gentle, and there was a sense of peace in his sway.

My dear child he said, “Why are you crying”? “This land”, I said, “it is so unkind and uncaring, where can one go to find respite from such wearing?”

“In this world you are in where so many seek peace, people often search in vain because they don't often understand it is to Me they must come to find what they seek”.

“But why”, I asked, “have so many not found it all?” “There is anger, spite, and cruelness here and there. Is it possible that there are any that care?”

“Yes, my dear one, they are here and there, the problem is people often forget that when those call Me Father take their eyes off me, they wander in darkness and feel as if lost at sea. There is not one immune in this world filled with sin, but take heart my child they have only to let Me in.”

I looked up in His eyes and saw such love and healing, but at the same time there seem a certain sadness, that the people of this world whom He so loved could turn to such badness. Here was a light that shown brighter than stars, a love that could not be contained in any made by man jars.

I looked and said, “how does it change, can it be saved, how do I go on, in this world full of rage?”

“You take Me with you in your every day journey, up hills down valleys and the land in between. The love I have shown you has to be seen. In your actions with others, in your words and deeds, you have to become the wheat that shines out from among the weeds.”

I looked at him with my eyes open wide, “I am but one person and I feel so very small in this world that doesn’t seem to care very much at all”.

He smiled as He took my hand and he said,“You are who I made you don’t ever fear, I am with you at all times so don’t shed a tear. I made you to reflect the sacrifice of a perfect lamb, wherever you go you take with you the great I AM.”

So, with a gentle touch he brushed a tear from my cheek and with a strong hand set me to my feet. “Now go and spread joy from this valley to the next, there are others just like you and you will meet them I know.”

“My work here they do as you will do too. You will learn that when everything in the land doesn’t seem right, it only needs the love you will show to help lessen the darkness and allow in the light.”

So, I left in the direction He had put me in, and knew that one day when His work for me was through I would see Him again. In a land where everything was perfectly right, in a land that was created by He who is the Light.

This came to me yesterday as I was struggling with a few things. It is amazing how God reaches out to us in our down times and helps lift us up. I hope it will encourage you as well.

Different Day, Same Story...

2009-01-06T04:46:00.000-08:00

I posted this blog in 2007 and it came to mind today as I was thinking about some things. I thought I would post it again, since it is still very true of my life.

Am I Talking to the Walls?

"My life has a superb cast but I can't figure out the plot. "-Ashleigh Brilliant.

I really like this quote. I think it sums up what most people would say about their lives. Often I don’t know where my life is going to take me or more exactly where God will lead, but the majority of people in my life are definitely a highlight. One group of characters in this production of my life is my children. From the first moment I laid eyes on my first child, I didn’t know how people could not believe in God. I have also never know such joy.

I have had the same feeling when I have held each of my four children. They all have similarities but are also very different. Most of the time when you think of the parent child relationship, we think of the parents being the teachers. This is the case quite often, but I can say my children have taught me many lessons that I know they are not even aware they have taught me. I think one of the most important is my relationship with God.

I know so often with own children I feel like I am talking to the walls. The rules from yesterday and the previous years of their lives are forgotten so many times. I wish I had a dollar for every time I have said, “Don’t (insert any rule for example, run in the house!)” There is also the “Please clean up your room.” This statement is generally followed by “Now!”

I have often thought my children’s minds were made up of Etch-A-Sketches or White Boards and somehow while they sleep their minds are shook up or erased. Then the next morning we have to go back through it all again. It can be very frustrating at times but when I stop to think about how God my Heavenly Father, sees me as his child I will have to admit it must look very much the same. I often think I can even imagine God sitting in Heaven looking down on me and slowly shaking His head back and forth saying softly, “My child, my child, why won’t you ever learn?” “Why are we going through this lesson again?”

I always try to keep this image in my mind as I go about my day. I would love for some day for me to feel as if God is smiling and telling me He is proud of me. That I got it right, that I listened well, and followed Him in the right path. I know that He probably does smile at times when I am thankful for my blessings, love my neighbor as myself, and work to bring my children up in knowledge of Him, but I know most days He probably wants to throw His hands in the air and say, “Am I talking to the clouds?”

I get up everyday and know that once again, today, I will have to remind someone not to run in the house, to clean up their room, and treat their sibling kindly, but I also know that God understands because He started the day very much the same way.

The (heart)Beat of a Brand New Year!

2009-01-02T17:30:00.000-08:00

Well, a new year has begun. I am actually glad. We had a rough ending to 2008 starting on Christmas night when our youngest who turns 3 later this month had to be taken to the Children's Hospital. She had a tachycardia episode around 10:30 P.M. and after receiving her heart monitor transmission the on call cardiologist told us to take her down there. Her heart rate was 280 beats per minute. After working with her and several unsuccessful doses of medication, she began going into distress with her blood pressure dropping and her color paling out. They decided to shock her heart back into rhythm with a slight electrical jolt. That did seem to help but due to the medicine she was on via an I.V. she was admitted into the cardiac ICU there. She spent two days in ICU so they could wean her off the I.V. medication and onto and orad medication and so they could monitor her. She spent another day in the cardiac step down unit.

It was not quite the Christmas night we had planned but one that regardless of our lack of control in the situation, God was ever present. Since it was so late, almost 3 A.M, before they had her stabilized, we waited until morning to call our neighbor and our church family to have someone look after our other children. It had been late the night before and we had taken them with us not knowing exactly what we were dealing with.

It is amazing what wonderful people we have at our church and as neighbors. Not that I didn't already know this, but I ever reminded of it in small ways and big ways. There were people that looked after our children, other offers to look after them, prayers, emails, and phone calls checking on our daughter and us. In what should have been a very harried situation, I was at peace knowing that God was in control and that Emily was being seen by wonderful and caring doctors at the hospital. I attribute that peace to so many praying for us and to a God that knows what we need when we need it.

Our daughter's heart issue showed us the condition of so many other's hearts. Dear friends that reached out to us and showed us what God calls us to be. I never worried about my other children because I knew those watching them would care for them and keep them in line if need be. :)

Our daughter is doing well now on her medication. The doctor's are going to see how she does and when she is older they may do a procedure on her to eliminate the extra impulse in her heart that is causing the problem.

It is amazing what God can bless us with if we are able to see Him in all that happens to us. Many things are not always good, but God is always good and is always there. Sometimes we just let the grief, lack of control, and anger at times cloud our vision of Him. God never promises for things to be easy, but He does promise to never leave us or forsake us.

I pray that as the New Year gets started that we will all examine the condition of our hearts and recognize the areas we need to work on. I pray that we will not let our hearts be troubled, and that we can reflect the love of God in our actions with others.

Happy New Year!!

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-23T15:31:00.000-08:00

Well it is almost Christmas Eve. I think I have everything finished. I have some baking and cooking to do tomorrow but it wont take too long. My kids are excited and are trying to get us to let them open a present tonight. Christmas is a fun time of year. Our two, almost three, year old is really into it this year. She enjoys going and seeing the Christmas lights at night. She really likes "candy candies" - her term for candy canes.

I hope you all have a wonderful CHRISTmas and a blessed New Year! I hope that you will share some wonderful times with family and friends.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

How Far From Bethlehem?

2008-12-20T15:40:00.000-08:00

As I think about the new nativities my mom gave my kids this year and as I sit in traffic near the mall, a question kept coming to mind. How far are we from Bethlehem? Now geographically speaking, I am pretty far since I am outside Atlanta, Georgia. But the real question is how far am I from Bethlehem in my heart and in my actions?

Is Bethlehem a far away place in a far away time? Is it the reason for a season, but not the motivation behind my actions the other three seasons? Would I follow the star leading to the King if He came today? Do the songs of the angels still radiate in my heart today? How far am I?

In reality we shouldn't be very far from Bethlehem on a starry night that changed history and people's lives so many, many, years ago. The baby in the manger didn't stay a baby, and we can't either. We have to grow in Him. We have to keep the promise and gift of a Silent Night in the Little Town of Bethlehem. We have to heed the call that calls O Come All Ye Faithful. We should be joyful and triumphant. When was the last time you wanted to sing like the angels the shepherds heard on high?

One night long ago, a baby was born in a place called Bethlehem. The thing is what happened on that night should never be far from our hearts or our lives. Bethlehem should be with us always, close to us and our thoughts. So, take a moment and reflect, how far are you from Bethlehem?

The Grinches are Taking Over...

2008-12-10T09:36:00.000-08:00

Every Who down in Whoville liked Christmas a lot, but the Grinch, who lived just north of Whoville, did not. The Grinch hated Christmas - the whole Christmas season. Oh, please don't ask why, no one quite knows the reason. It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight. Or maybe his head wasn't screwed on just right. But I think that the most likely reason of all may have been that his heart was two sizes too small. Dr. Seuss

As a child and even today, I enjoy watching the tv special, How the Grinch Stole Christmas. It was always cute and the story had a good ending. The Grinch finally got what Christmas was about and joined right in.

I am not sure if you have noticed, I don't know how you couldn't, but there seems to be a whole army of Grinches trying to take away Christmas, well the Holiday season for those that just can't handle the word Christmas. I am sure we all know people who act as if their hearts are "two sizes too small".

It is like most places you look they are trying to take the joy out of our holly-Who wreaths. They are taking away our Christmas trees and the message in a manger scene. Why is it people want to take the joy out of Christmas and replace it with commercialism, greed, the must haves, politically correct ideas, the hurry, the scurry? It is as if they are all trying to take the feast, take the pudding, take the roast beast. They are trying to empty the ice box as quick as a flash. Why, those grinches are even trying to take the last can of "who hash"!

It is almost as if they want to take the whole wonder out of a Holy Night in the Little Town of Bethlehem. They want to take the boughs of holly out of the halls and take the jingle out of the bells. The grinches want to remove the holly jolly Christmas from our lives. The saddest thing in all of this is removing Christ out of Christmas. Even those who may not believe in a manger in Bethlehem, can understand the wonder in "tiny tots with their eyes all aglow" and the excitement of believing in the something special and in giving to others.

Why the rush for the army of grinches to remove all of this? I think like the original Grinch, they think if they take all of our toys, and decorations, our food for our feast away, then they can keep Christmas from coming. But as the Grinch learned,

He HADN'T stopped Christmas from coming! IT CAME!
Somehow or other, it came just the same!
...
"It came with out ribbons! It came without tags!"
"It came without packages, boxes or bags!"

Christmas is more than all of that. Christmas is about a giving gifts that mean so much more. Not actual things, but gifts beyond measure. The gift of baby in a manger to save those who come to Him, the gifts of three wise men, the gift of song to shepherds in a field, the gift from one child to another child, the gift of the twinkle in the eye of a jolly man in a red suit, the gift of drummer boy who gave all he had. Christmas is about giving, but not just things we can buy in store, yes, Christmas we have to realize means so much more. You can take a way the jing-tinglers, the toys, and the wreaths, but you can't take away Christmas when it comes from the heart.

Christmas will always be with us as long as we can give to others in love, accept the uncomparable gift of salvation from God above, we can take the time to enjoy simple pleasures, and learn that it isn't always gold that is a treasure. Christmas may be a day on the calendar in December, but the warmth of it should stay with us throughout the year burning brighter than an ember.

So, go forth and share the love of a baby in a manger, share the Christmas spirit with a friend and a stranger and maybe, just maybe that army of grinches will reconsider what they are fighting against. Maybe their hearts won't feel so tight, maybe they realize that they can learn to live with the light, maybe they will catch the joy of the season and yes, maybe even they will even come to realize the reason.

The Wild Ride Before Thanksgiving

2008-11-25T04:22:00.000-08:00

We were supposed to be visiting my parents in Florida for the Thanksgiving holidays. In fact we were supposed to leave tomorrow morning but our trip has been cancelled. In some ways it never really got off the ground. We had been trying to work out going to see them and something kept getting in the way. Our plans changed about 6 times over about 3 days. Finally on Friday of last week we had everything worked out, or at least we thought.

Saturday morning I had a run in with a deer while driving. Though thankfully I was not injured (the deer was not so fortunate), the car while damamged was not damamged too badly, it did end our hopes of the trip. The money we had for the trip would now go towards our deductible to get the car fixed and then the damage has to be repaired before we do a long trip with it. So,with a heavy heart, I called mom and told her the trip was off. I had begun to think there was some reason we weren't supposed to go because often when things just don't seem to be coming together or are just too difficult they aren't meant to be.

Well fast forward from Saturday morning to yesterday (Monday) evening. Our youngest had a head cold this weekend and it moved into her chest. I had to take her to the after hours children's clinic. Shortly after we got there she had a tachycardia episode. So they had to get her breathing issues resolved and monitor her heart. She is now on breathing treatments for the next 7 days and we have to keep and eye for further heart rate issues. So, even if Bambi (well actually Feline) hadn't wiped out our trip, Emily's illness would have.

It is amazing sometimes how often our plans fail but in the perspective of God, He was always in control. He knew what we would be facing and helped us deal with the issue of changing our plans. We weren't meant to go to Florida and now we understand why.

I am praying for a quick recovery for Emily and that the doctor's will eventually determine why she has issues with tachycardia. She had an episode this past June. So, while I am shopping tonight for the food to fix our Thanksgiving meal that I had thought I wouldn't be fixing, I will thank God for always being in control even when I don't always see it, I will thank Him for my family, thank Him for watching over all of us, thank Him for the gift of salvation, thank Him for His steadfast love, and so many other things.

It isn't often we recognize God directly involved in our lives though He is always there. Thankfully, this is one time I got to see it through the flash of a deer, a sick child, and plans that just didn't seem to come together. This is one of those times when my answer to prayer wasn't my answer but His answer and for that I am grateful.

May God Bless you and Happy Thanksgiving!

Why Can't Every Day Be Like Christmas?

2008-11-19T13:01:00.001-08:00

Today my kids and I are going to a friend's house to have some Christmas fun. We are going to make snowflake ornaments and the bird feeders made out of pine cones and peanut butter. The ornaments will be taken to an assisted living facility not far from us and handed out to the senior citizens that are living there. I am excited the kids get to be a part of this. Far too often these days we focus too much on ourselves and what the holiday is bringing to us, and not what we are bringing to holiday for others.

We are going to listen to Christmas music, drink hot chocolate, eat cookies, and listen to the excitement of 9 - 11 kids ages 2 - 14 share in joy of the season. One of the things I look forward to in today is watching the kids work together and share in this fun.

Isn't it amazing that we find the most joy doing for others and helping to bring a smile to someone else's face?

There is song that Elvis Presley sang titled, If Everyday Was Like Christmas

The chorus says the following:

Oh why can't every day be like Christmas?
Why can't this feeling go on endlessly?
For if every day would be just like Christmas,
What a wonderful world this would be.

I have always enjoyed listening to this song, but something has always struck me about how sad the song sounds in some aspect. Someone lamenting the fact that everyday isn't like Christmas. For the Christian, isn't everyday supposed to carry the spirit and joy of Christmas so that every day does feel like Christmas? Why is it we wait for this one time of year to celebrate our Savior's birth or to feel the joy of Christmas? The song writer is very correct in saying, "What a wonderful world this would be." Yes, indeed what a wonderful world it would be if Christians truly experienced the joy, peace, and and attitude of Christmas every day. What a difference we would make to the world.

So, if you need a little boost in making every day feel like Christmas: go read the Christmas story in the Bible, get yourself some glue, paper, paint - whatever brings a smile to your face and makes you excited, cut out a snowflake, make a paper chain, make a card for someone, write your favorite Bible verse on a card to give to someone and turn up the Christmas music.

Why can't ever day be like Christmas? Isn't it supposed to be?

Pluto - A Dwarf Planet

2008-11-16T05:41:00.001-08:00

Recently I was looking at a catalog with a lot of neat gifts in it. There was a sweatshirt in it that said, "When I was your age, Pluto was a planet". I found this humorous because it made me recall a conversation with my third child early last year. Now to understand why this conversation is so dear to me, you have to know a little about our third child Anna. Anna is delightful! She is a red headed joy! Anna's most noticable fault, and I really wouldn't call it that, is that she is VERY literal. She takes what everyone says to be exactly what they say and often doesn't always initially distinguish between words that have a multiple meaning until she understands the context they are used in. We have a hard time with her not getting that we are teasing her at first. That being said, she has been our easiest child to raise so far because she generally follows the rules and makes sure others know them as well. When you tell her, don't do something or another she generally doesn't do it. Back to the story...

One day when we were waiting on something Anna turned to me and said, "Do you know Pluto is a dwarf planet?" I said yes, it is consider as one now. Then she looked at me with a very straight but troubled face and said, "The thing I don't get is how those little men are able to live on it when it is so cold and so far away." I about busted out laughing but kept it inside since I knew she was confused that it wasn't a dwarf planet because it had little men from fairy tales on it, but was catagorized that way due to its size. I explained to her that dwarf meant small not that dwarves live there.

Anna is amazing. She is very intelligent and her take on things is very intersting and generally right. I am thankful for the blessing of this wonderful little girl. I think we all should have an Anna in our life, that causes us to pause and think about things and see things from a different perspective.

A Day with the Father

2008-11-14T18:35:00.000-08:00

We have four children. Three girls and one boy. They are 12, 10, 7, and 2. They spend a lot of time around me since I am home with them. They love to have individual time with each of us but especially their dad since they don't see him as often since he is at work most of the day during the week. They like to get time with their dad. Time where he takes just one of them out for a while. Sometimes he takes them to lunch and a movie, sometimes for a walk, and sometimes for hot chocolate at the book store. These are special times for them. Times that are out of the ordinary.

As I reflected on this today, it made me think about time with my heavenly Father. How often do I get excited about spending time with Him? How often do I go out of my way to clear my schedule to have just some Father and Me time? Do I get that sparkle in my eyes or run back up the stairs to get my good jeans on for my Father when I hear Him call?

The thing is that when it comes to our Heavenly Father, He is always there wanting to spend time with us. No appointment necessary for His part. He is there wanting to hear about my joys, my sorrows, my friends, my family, my everything.

Unlike my kids' times with their dad that are special because those times are out of the ordinary, time with my Heavenly Father is special because He is always here. Seeing my joy when my kids make me laugh, seeing the tears I shed because of the hurt I sometimes feel, he is also excited when I accomplish something to further His kingdom. Yes, the extraordinary thing about a day with my Father is that He wants to spend every minute I am willing to give to Him with me. It isn't special in the fact it is an every day occurance, but that it is multiple occurances every day.

So, clear your calendar, get your nice jeans or favorite outfit on, let your eyes sparkle, and go spend time with the Father. You will be glad you did!

God's Paintbrush

2008-11-06T07:24:00.000-08:00

It is a beautiful fall day here north of Atlanta! The different shades or red, yellow, and orange are so bright and stunning. Fall is my favorite time of the year and this year it seems more beautiful than the last few. When I look at the beauty all around me I am in awe that the creator of all of this is the one that created me as well. I am also aware He is still working on me.

I know that this beautiful fall day that displays His glory has to make Him smile. I also know that the fact I enjoy it and know He created it, makes Him smile as well. How do I know that? Because as my heavenly father, I know He has to enjoy the times I am excited about His creation.

So, if you have the time today, get out and enjoy the day God has given to you. Yes, each day is a gift whether robed in golden splendor or cloaked in somber rain clouds. Each day we are given is an opportunity to praise Him, help others, grow more, and be a part of a wonderful creation with an ever present Creator.